


This is Just to Say

by burnintoash (funnymorning)



Category: Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Bodyguard, Alternate Universe - College/University, M/M, Platonic Ongwoon - we going there, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-08
Updated: 2018-08-08
Packaged: 2019-06-22 08:43:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 45,456
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15578070
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/funnymorning/pseuds/burnintoash
Summary: “Hwang Minhyun.” The guy says and flips open an ID pass with the telltale logo of ‘Presidential Security Service’ on it. “I am starting today.”Seongwoo shuts the door in his face.AKA a Bodyguard!AU





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A couple of notes.
> 
> 1\. I did do the research, but I am still not very well-versed in the Korean government system, so please let me know if you find something factually wrong / offensive / just strange. I will fix it up.
> 
> 2\. Continuing from point 1, I actually do not know if the Blue Houses has a special cleaning service. I am just hoping that there is.
> 
> 3\. My literature knowledge, also, is not a lot, so I bullshit most of it. Please read it with several pinches of salts.
> 
> 4\. Aged Up characters, but age differences are more or less the same as canon
> 
> 5\. Title taken from William C Williams' poem : https://www.poets.org/poetsorg/poem/just-say 
> 
> 6\. Thank you

“Isn’t he too young for this?”

 

“He is 26, the same age as you.”

 

“Ok, but to be fair,” Seongwoo tries to loosen the knot on his tie a little. He has never gotten used to wearing ties for a long period of time.

 

Sungwoon slaps his hand away before he can even try because apparently, he has a third eye and can see Seongwoo’s movements despite being engrossed in the documents in his hands. “I would not trust myself with my life either.”

 

“ _To be fair,_ ” Sungwoon imitates his voice without even looking away from the inches-thick binder. “You cannot be trusted with anything so what’s your point again? And stop trying to undo your tie. I spent the 5 minutes I didn’t have on that Eldredge.”

 

“Is that the way to speak to the First Son?” Seongwoo laughs.

 

“When the First Son keeps ruining his clothes, yeah.” Sungwoon sighs and slams the binder closed. “The Finnish Prime Minister is arriving in..” he looks down at his watch “...approximately 10 minutes and the meet and greet will go on for like 15 minutes max before they stop pretending to be nice for the press, so can you _please_ stay still for the next half hour?”

 

“You expect too much of me.” Seongwoo grunts, but Sungwoon has lost interest in him, already on his phone and typing in a speed that resembles a bullet train. “Anyway, this bodyguard dude.”

 

“He’s a PSS agent.”

 

“A glorified body guard.” Seongwoo interrupts him anyway, despite the dirty glare he got from Sungwoon. “He is too young and honestly does not even look that impressive from his photo.”

 

“Uh-huh.” Sungwoon nods. “I assume you also read his file instead of just looking at the one photo there and know that he served in the army for 5 years and has been with NIS for 3 before moving to the Presidential Security Committee as part of the special request from Blue House.”

 

“Of course, I did.”

 

Seongwoo definitely did not.

 

“So, it is his age, not his skill set or experience you have a problem with.” Sungwoon raises an eyebrow, looking amused. And that is the scary thing because Sungwoon only gets amused like this when he knows he is going to school somebody pretty fucking hard in the near future. But still, Seongwoo is not Ong Seongwoo if he does not make at least three regrettable choices on a daily basis.

 

“Yep.”

 

“Fine then. I’ll arrange Ms. Kim from the President’s current PSS rotation instead to be your personal agent. She has at least 15 years on you so age should not be a problem.”

 

“You would not!” Seongwoo squeaks. He is scared of Ms. Kim, much more than he is scared of Sungwoon and that is saying a lot. (Although to be fair, even his mom is scared of Ms. Kim and she is the President of the Republic of Korea, so no one can really fault Seongwoo for that.)

 

Sungwoon gives him a look that says _try me,_ and Seongwoo would rather _not_.

 

“So, those are my choices?” Seongwoo pouts. “Between a complete stranger dude and a demonic librarian from hell as a live-in bodyguard?”

 

“Either those or you move into the Blue House. I will arrange just day-time security details for you if you move back.”

 

“No.” Seongwoo refuses promptly, and Sungwoon shrugs like it is no big loss. He has probably expected Seongwoo to say no, because, well, because of the previous two hundred times Seongwoo has said no to staying at the Blue House. He has no doubt that his supposed room at Blue House is probably bigger and more comfortable (and without the ruckus, courtesy of a Kim Jaehwan,  every morning) than his tiny dorm room, but just the idea of staying at a place like that makes Seongwoo suffocate with pressure and stress. His mom can argue all day about not being able to stay with her only family under one roof, but they both know that mom barely spends any time at the residence except for the sleeping.

 

He does not want to stay in a place that is large enough to cover five different buildings and a garden, and too prim and proper, and where they regularly do _tours_.

 

“You know what your problem is?” Sungwoon asks.

 

Seongwoo does not, but he is sure he is gonna be informed of in the next few seconds.

 

“You are just..” Sungwoon continues, still typing away on his phone. “... being a little shit and giving me flaky excuses because you don’t want a bodyguard.”

 

“I don’t need a bodyguard, hyung.” Seongwoo whines. “I’ve been doing fine by my own since mom got into office.”

 

“That was before the peace talk with the North started and before the threat level rises against the president.”

 

“Exactly.” Seongwoo insists. “The President, who, as far as I know, is not me.”

 

“Your mom has the best security details this country has to offer.”

 

“Really? Because from the way you were selling that bodyguard, sorry, _PSS agent_ , I’d have thought he’s second coming of Kevin Costner in the Bodyguard or something.”

 

Sungwoon stares at him blankly before saying. “Weird choice of a comparison aside, I already talked this over with your mom, Seongwoo. If she has her ways, she will send a whole army of PSS agents to your school.”

 

Seongwoo winces because he knows Sungwoon is right.

 

“I got her to agree to just one personal security detail - the best I can find and someone you can probably feel comfortable with so you don’t make too much fuss and  we still have a way to keep our eyes on you. Look, with all the shits that’s been going on, the President has been sleeping like three hours at most at night. At least, let her sleep that three hours peacefully without having to worry about you halfway in town.”

 

Seongwoo pouts and plays with the name block on the table in front of him that says “Ha Sungwoon, Chief Presidential Secretary” until Sungwoon snaps at him to leave his name block alone. He should ask his potential bodyguards to fight off Sungwoon as a mean of audition round or something. Sungwoon would probably win by finding some ways to weaponize his stamp or something, Seongwoo has no doubt.

 

“They are landing.” Sungwoon says as his phone beeps and, stands from the couch where he has been sitting and taking way too much space for someone his size. “Put your First Son smile on.”

 

“This one?” Seongwoo gives the most uncomfortable smile he can muster and Sungwoon just rolls his eyes, unfolding his dress shirt cuffs.

 

“Put the skills you are getting a Master for to use.” Sungwoon grunts. “And _act_ like you want to be here.”

 

Seongwoo sighs and drowns his glass of water. If he is going to be stuck with some important and probably snobbish people for political bamboozle he does not quite understand for the next half hour,  he might as well be hydrated.

 

“And,” Sungwoon turns to him before opening the door that leads into the hallway towards the Press Center. “Give me a choice between, what did you call her again, the demon librarian from hell? I personally think she’s more of a gatekeeper of hell. Anyway, give me your choice between her and Hwang Minhyun by end of day, or I will assign the both of them to you.”

 

“I hope you get choked by your own lanyard.”

 

“You would not be the first one to wish it.”

 

* * *

 

The meet and greet with the Finnish Prime Minister and her daughter is, to be succinct, boring. And to exaggerate, it is incredibly mind-blowingly for-real B.O.R.I.N.G.

 

At  least, brunch is served in lieu of mini croissants and mini cupcakes  and mini doughnuts - seriously, have the chefs at the Blue House been replaced by the Lilliputs - why is everything mini? Seongwoo stuffs his face with about two doughnuts which barely fill his mouth.

 

The daughter of the Finnish Prime Minister, Millia-something gives Seongwoo a look that is akin to a grimace. She was all too eager to talk to him about five minutes back, when she still was under the impression that Seongwoo, like her who is across the globe on a diplomatic trip at the ripened age of 23, would have useful knowledge to contribute towards her probably very educated and important topics of conversations. Seongwoo wouldn’t know - he blanked out after she started talking about Economic Reform in Europe. It gets even worse when she inquires after what Seongwoo is majoring in when Seongwoo brought up his Masters. He can literally see her trying not to frown when he told her _“Theatre.”_

 

“Your mom is a brilliant woman.” She had said and Seongwoo can almost hear the undertones of _why are you not as brilliant_. “I thought you’d have political ambitions, and while I can admire Arts as a form of interest, it would not help you much in the political landscape, would it? Unless the ministerial environment is different here.”

 

“I do not have political ambitions.” Seongwoo had replied after untangling her unnecessarily convoluted vocabulary. Thank you, mom, for all those English lessons he cried through. “We are pretty upfront about that actually.”

 

“I have read the news pieces,” she said. Yeah, she probably is the type of person to do _research_ on him before meeting him in person. Seongwoo suddenly felt bad not even remembering her first name in full. “But I thought they are just .. well ..”

 

“Lies?”

 

“Necessary precautions while you work your way up.”

 

“I really am not working anywhere up,” Seongwoo laughs down at him shoes, new and shiny, courtesy of Sungwoon who chewed him out this morning for not polishing his one pair of dress shoes and then promptly pulled out a brand new pair of shoes. _I knew you’d turn up in one monstrosity or another, Seongwoo_.

 

“I see.” She nodded and said very politely although she looks like she had just sucked on a particularly sour lemon.

 

That is the problem with a lot of the people. They have a lot of expectations for Seongwoo, which is weird and creepy because they do not even know he existed nine months before. When his mom first took office, Seongwoo was prepared to deal with going from simply worrying about his mom overworking to worrying about the whole nation turning its eyes on her. He was, however, very much not prepared to deal with the whole nation turning its eyes on _him_ as well.

 

As it turned out, people are very interested in the only son of their new president. Especially one who is old enough to be working the _political landscape._ After all, even Sungwoon was only a year older than Seongwoo is now when he became the Chief of Staff (But then again, Sungwoon is a force of nature, like a hurricane or a tornado, and Seongwoo is barely a summer breeze). Seongwoo really has no interest in politics because first of all, he does not understand half of it and more importantly, he loves arts and music too much to not imagine himself doing it for the rest of his life.

 

During her first few months, the President had sat down with multiple publications and TV stations for personal interviews, and had reiterated again and again that her son does not have any political ambition or any plan to follow in her footsteps, but as most of these things go, nobody really believes her. People probably just thought it’d be a matter of years before another Ong pops out in the government body.

 

Well, that’d probably be from another very rare Ong family because this one? No. One government person in the family is one too many.

 

Speaking of the one too many government body in the family, his mom has finally gotten away from the clutch of the Finnish Prime Minister (seriously, that woman has talons for nails), and is coming towards him and Seongwoo drowns the pastries in his mouth with the lukewarm tea in his cup.

 

“You look handsome.” Mom said and Seongwoo stops himself from commenting (again) that she looks too gaunt - she has been losing more and more weighs lately, and Seongwoo just hopes that the new dietary plan is working well for her, if she eats at all.

 

“You look beautiful too,” Seongwoo replies, but it comes out more like _yoooloofutifultoo_ with all the food inside his mouth. Thankfully, his mom just laughs.

 

“How is the Prime Minister?” Seongwoo asks after making sure that he has no stucky pastry left inside his mouth.

 

“She’s nice.” Mom nods and Seongwoo laughs discreetly because he has been hearing from both Sungwoon and mom complaining about the Finnish rescheduling their visit again and again and how much they can’t stand the overly saccharine tone and demeanor of the Finnish PM.

 

“She is!” Mom gives him a look, and insists and Seongwoo just nods along. “Sungwoon told me that you are ok with your new security detail.” She continues. “That’s good. I was worried you might say no.”

 

Seongwoo internally curses at Sungwoon even though he is right. Seongwoo is no way in hell going to choose Ms. Kim as his live-in bodyguard (he is not even sure if that is an actual feasible option because Ms. Kim is pretty much settled on the regular rotation for his mom’s personal security details, but he is not going to take chance on any of Sungwoon’s threats). That left him with only choice even if it is more of an illusion of a choice.

 

“It’s… fine.” Seongwoo grits out. “Sungwoon hyung said it won’t be for too long.”

 

“Only until the talks are over and we can reach a definitive agreement.” His mom assures him again, and Seongwoo sighs in defeat. Who knows how long these kind of things can stretch out and Seongwoo is definitely not looking forward to having a bodyguard next to him 24/7, but he does not want to make his mom worried more than she already is over him.

 

“It will be fine.” Seongwoo reiterates although he is not so sure if he is assuring his mom or himself.

 

* * *

 

The doorbell does not necessarily wake Seongwoo because he had been awake for at least 20 minutes and lazing around Instagram on his bed, but it does jolts him out of that morning sleepiness haze that he is in.

 

It takes a couple of seconds for him to react because he has even forgotten that they have a doorbell in the first place, and it is way too early for anyone who has a reason to visit him at the dorm to be ringing it.

 

Seongwoo carries himself out of bed with the energy of someone who had stayed up until 3 in the morning for a thesis, and opens the door … and comes face to face with someone far too hot for Seongwoo to be facing in his morning bedhead and wrinkled shirt glory.

 

“Do you always open your door to any stranger?” The guy at the other end of threshold says and what.

 

“You rang the doorbell.” Seongwoo says dumbly.

 

“And you did not look through the peephole to check who is knocking at your door at 8 in the morning.”

 

“How’d you know I didn’t?” Seongwoo asks back even though he is pretty sure his first priority right now should be asking this unfairly hot but also patronizing dude at his doorstep who the fuck he is and what the fuck he thinks he is doing.

 

“Because if you did and realized that it is someone you didn’t know, you wouldn’t have opened the door.”

 

Seongwoo still would have because mama did not raise no rude bastard, thank you very much.

 

“Hang on,” Seongwoo blinks and says slowly, now that his brain has finished the long running rebooting sequences and he can vaguely recognize the face in front of him. “You are the PSS dude, aren’t you? The agent?”

 

“Hwang Minhyun.” The guy says and flips open an ID pass with the telltale logo of ‘President Security Service’ on it. “I am starting today.”

 

Seongwoo shuts the door in his face.

 

* * *

 

 

“Sir,” Hwang Minhyun is banging on the door and Seongwoo scoffs, focusing on brushing his teeth. “Please open the door.”

 

“You said,” Seongwoo says and realizes that it comes out more as a gargle with all the toothpaste inside his mouth so he quickly runs to the kitchen sink to rinse his mouth before coming back to the front door. “You said I shouldn’t open the door to any stranger!”

 

“I showed you my ID!” Hwang Minhyun sounds frustrated right now, which, serves him right. Who does he think he is? Coming here and acting like a fucking tool. “You know who I am.”

 

“Do I though?” Seongwoo replies. “For all I know, that ID could be fake.”

 

“You…” Minhyun groans and Seongwoo giggles to himself, heading into his bedroom to change into something that has been washed recently and not have any ramen or coffee stain. 

 

His phone rang and Seongwoo wonders if Hwang has his number as well, but the name flashing is Sungwoon (or to be more accurate, it is ‘[Siren Emoji][Fire Emoji][Bomb Emoji]Sungwoon Hyung[Heart Emoji] - his relationship with Sungwoon is complicated, ok?). 

 

Seongwoo groans and seriously considers not picking it up but doing that hasn’t gone particularly well for him in the past occurances, so he takes the L and mutters a fake cheery ‘hello’ into his phone.

 

“Ong Seongwoo!” Well, apparently, Sungwoon is not in the mood for any greeting. “I’ve been playing referee between two bitchass ambassadors since the break of dawn, so help me God, if you are also planning on getting on my nerves today, I will scoop your eyeball out with a rusty spoon and feed it back to you.”

 

“I didn’t even do anything!” Seongwoo complains. “You didn’t tell me he was coming today.”

 

“I told you as soon as possible, which translates to  _ as soon as fucking possible. _ Open the door to your agent, Seongwoo or I’ll have Guanlin call your RA and open it.”

 

“Urgh,” Seongwoo groans. “Fine. And stop teaching the intern your evil ways. He is too soft.”

 

“Behave.” Sungwoon says (threatens) and then hangs up. Seongwoo uselessly sticks his tongue out at his phone and stomps towards the door. He is not particularly proud of the pout he is sure is apparent on his face, but whatever.

 

“That was a low blow.” He says and opens the door. “You didn’t have to call Sungwoon hyung.”

 

“Would you have opened the door otherwise?” Hwang Minhyun says and steps in before Seongwoo can move out of his way entirely. Damn it. He smells far too good for someone Seongwoo is supposed to be angry at. “Plus, there are rumours that you only listen to the chief of staff. Sounds like they are true.”

 

“I don't listen to him only.” Seongwoo protests but Hwang Minhyun apparently is not listening - he is already in the middle of the living room, hands on hips under his coat (it is fucking summer who the fuck even wear trench coats in summer) and looking around. Seongwoo suddenly feels embarrassed at the ..  _ condition  _ … of his living room - the pile of tangled guitar strings on the coffee table (courtesy of Jaehwan) and the pile of probably/hopefully washed but unfolded clothes on the couch (also courtesy of Jaehwan - Seongwoo suspects he has been wearing clothes out of that pile lately instead of putting them into his wardrobe like a regularly functioning adult), the stuck empty ramen cups and half finished beer bottles next to a wad of bills and coins (ok, that one is Seongwoo) - everything is suddenly screaming to him that Seongwoo perhaps does not have his life together after all, which you know, is not exactly news, but still a realization. 

 

“Did you always sleep with your windows open?”

 

“Huh?”

 

Hwang Minhyun points towards the open door towards Seongwoo’s room. “That’s your room, right? Do you always sleep with your windows open?”

 

“Yeah, it’s summer.” Seongwoo shrugs. “It gets hot at night.”

 

“Is you air conditioner not working?”

 

“It is, but I like the outside air more.” Seongwoo answers and follows Minhyun into the room.

 

“This,” Minhyun knocks on the window frame with his knuckles, and says. “This is a very strong access point. You need to have it shut. If you prefer to have your windows opened, I’d suggest moving to the topmost floor. I can arrange you to switch room with someone...”

 

“No,” Seongwoo cuts in. “Listen, I’ve already told this to Sungwoon hyung, and I am not sure he relayed that to you but my one condition with all this is that I do not trouble the people around me unnecessarily.”

 

“Well, if someone gets in through this open window and gets to you, I’d think a murder in the dorm would pretty much trouble anyone here, right?”

 

Seongwoo glares at him. “You are here to make sure things like that don’t happen.”

 

Hwang Minhyun, honest to god, laughs. “So, windows closed?”

 

Ergh. “Fine. Anything else?”

 

“We’ll need to sweep your place for bugs, either today or tomorrow.”

 

“You think the North bugged my dorm room?” Seongwoo scoffs. Well, if they did, Seongwoo has nothing but sympathy for the poor sucker who has to keep listening to the shits Seongwoo and his friends had gotten up to under the influence of alcohol right here in this room. 

 

“It’s a standard procedure.” Hwang Minhyun replies. “And we need to go through your security details and what they’d entail.”

 

“We will do it when I have some food in my stomach.” Seongwoo says decidedly and gets a little surprised when Minhyun agrees.

 

Wait, that is right. He is Minhyun’s employer. True, he is not paying his salary or has hired him, but still he is the boss here. 

 

That makes him feel a little better.

 

“I suppose you can’t make me breakfast?” Seongwoo asks as Minhyun leaves the room so Seongwoo can get changed. “We have eggs and bread that is probably expiring soon.”

 

“Not in my job description, sir.” Minhyun smiles sincerely, like he can smile his way into blinding Seongwoo to not realize that Minhyun is snarking back at him (it does, for a second). Seongwoo really has to talk to Sungwoon about getting their security department to either hire a better photographer or upgrade their photography equipments, because the blurry face Seongwoo has seen in Minhyun file? It does not do the slightest justice to the actual face. 

 

“Well then,” Seongwoo says. “I hope you like bitter coffee and burnt toast over at the student’s cafe.”


	2. Chapter 2

The toast is not that burnt and Seongwoo has dropped a worrying high amount of sugar into his coffee so it is bearable.

 

Hwang Minhyun, however, is not even touching the one Americano he has ordered, instead opting to bring out a leather notebook from the messenger bag he has with him. He looks like a weirdly out-of-place hipster journalist, with his neatly styled hair and beige coat/dress pant combo sitting in a shobby cafe where most patrons are students with bedhead and in mismatched sweat suits.

 

“So, first thing.” Hwang Minhyun starts and Seongwoo waves a hand as to say _start away._ “Accomodation.”

 

“I told you I am not moving.” Seongwoo reminds him.

 

“Not yours, mine.” He is corrected immediately and Seongwoo internally winces. That’s right. Sungwoon did say _live-in_ bodyguard. Goddammit. He does not want another dorm mate and the rooms are already tight enough as it is because originally, his dorm is a double which was just partitioned into two singles, each room barely fitting a single bed and a small wardrobe. “I will be taking the unoccupied room at 108, two doors down from your room.”

 

“Wait, 108 is vacant?”

 

“Yes, it was when I asked.” Minhyun replies. “Don’t worry. I didn’t kick anyone out on your behalf.”

 

Seongwoo nods and motions at him to carry on.

 

“You were given priority level two so I will accompany you to everywhere, including your classes, social gatherings, trip to gym, taking out the trash, etc.”

 

“If I am priority level one, will you come and hold my hand when I pee?”

 

Minhyun does not grace him with a reply. “From what I have seen, your daily routine is fairly straightforward with your classes and theatre sessions taking up the most time, so ..”

 

“Hang on.” Seongwoo interrupts him. “What do you mean _you have seen_?”

 

“I’ve been following you for three days.”

 

What the fuck.

 

Minhyun continues like he does not just witness Seongwoo’s jaw probably dropping onto the stained and grimy table. “Which actually ties in to the point I was bringing up before you interrupt me. I would suggest you to make your gym visits a regular occurrence as well, maybe two or three days per week, and I can help you train.”

 

“Err. Stop. Pause.” Seongwoo makes a big X with his arms and says. “Hold your horses, whatever. I have questions, like several questions.”

 

Hwang Minhyun sighs like he is the suffering one here. (No, he is not. That’d be Seongwoo)

 

“Go ahead.”

 

“Ok, one, why on earth were you following me? I thought you are assigned to protect me from creepers instead of being one. And two, the gym, seriously?”

 

“I was doing research on you,” Minhyun shrugs like it is that simple. “I wanted to know what your uninterrupted daily routine is like, what your weak points are and if I want to harm you, what would be the most optimal option.”

 

“Ok, I am gonna regret asking this,” Seongwoo says decidedly. “But what is the most optimal option if you want to like… I don’t know, hurt me?”

 

“Apart from just watching you be yourself and ran into lamp posts at night?” Minhyun smiles, again it is very irritatingly confusing because his smile does not match the snark that is coming out from his mouth.

 

And also, Hwang Minhyun has been stalking him, alright? Seongwoo literally just ran into a lamp post two nights back, but in his defense, the spongebob meme he was checking on his phone at that time was really funny.

 

“Yes, apart from that,” Seongwoo makes a face and grunts.

 

“Well, the security at your university is pretty decent, surprisingly, but they still fall for the I-am-a-student-who-forgot-his-card trick, so I’d probably use that to gain access to your class if I want something public. If I want something quiet, I can just taze you on any of the night you walk back to your dorm. The shortcuts you took are way too deserted and you had your music blasted in your earphones so loud that you didn’t even realize that the same person was following you for three nights straight.”

 

“Ok, Mr. Creepy McCreep.” Seongwoo mumbles. “I am sorry not all of us are paranoid about someone jumping us, ok?”

 

“It’s not a bad thing to be concerned about one’s own safety.” Minhyun replies. “Especially when one is the First Son of Korea.”

 

He does have a point, but Seongwoo hates this, hates being the someone that he did not ask for, or he did not want to, being expected to live up to some standard that he is never going to measure up to.

 

“Which is why,” Minhyun continues, cutting through the silence. “I am suggesting you to train at the gym. I can help you work out, and you can take better care of yourself when this assignment is over.”

 

“And when do you think it’ll be over?”

 

“I was assigned for a six-month basis,” Minhyun answers. “Which makes sense because the reunification summit is being held in four months times, and your threat level should go down if all goes well.”

 

“And if it doesn’t?” Seongwoo asks.

 

“Well, that’s for the president to decide. Either I will continue or depending on the nature of the threat level, we will have to adjust.”

 

Seongwoo grumbles and bites down on his now hardened toast.

 

“You don’t sound too enthusiastic about continuing.”

 

“I am perfectly content with my assignment, sir, and I will perform my duty to the best of my ability.” Minhyun smiles again, and Seongwoo is starting to notice the passive aggressive nature of those smiles.

 

“Leave the acting to us professionals, won’t you?” He scoffs. “And stop calling me sir.”

 

“Is that an order?” Minhyun asks. “Sir?”

 

“Yes, it’s a fucking order. Goddammit!”

 

Minhyun raises an eyebrow. “Alright. Mr. Ong.”

 

“That is even worse.” Seongwoo scrunches his face. “Just call me Seongwoo.”

 

“Not when I am on duty, I can’t. It’s the protocol.”

 

“Really?” Seongwoo asks. “Calling me my name is against the protocol?”

 

“It is to set the nature of the relationship with the client. You are an assignment, not a friend to us. It helps us focus and keep things clearer.”

 

“Wow, you really know how to make a guy feel special.” Seongwoo mumbles, and looks down at his phone. “And it is not even half past ten in the morning yet.”

 

“Which I believe is half an hour before your elective poetry class.”

 

“Mother...fuck.” Seongwoo says with feelings. With everything that is going on, he forgets about his first class of the day. “Shit. Ok. I need to go. Hold on. We need to go? Let’s go? I don’t know how this thing works.”

 

“Just … go, sir.” Minhyun sighs. “I will be right behind you.”

 

* * *

 

Seongwoo made it to his ModPo (Modern Korean Poetry) class in time, mostly because he sacrificed his shower this morning and instead opting to just grab his bag and run. Whatever. He showered last night before crashing.

 

Minhyun looked like he wanted to say something, but he did not and instead just walked a couple of steps behind Seongwoo into the Literature Building. He must have had his pass sorted out with the school faculty because he tapped a card of his own into the student restricted area until Seongwoo turned to face him before he went into class.

 

“Dude, you can’t follow me into class!”

 

Minhyun blinks. “I told you I’d have to accompany you to your classes.”

 

“And you did. You are here. But it’s weird to have my … bodyguard … sitting in my class with me. Plus, other kids will be distracted, and what would I even say to the professor?”

 

“I’ve cleared necessary permissions with the Dean. All your professors should be aware of this change. And I don’t think just an extra body in the lecture hall is going to distract anyone.”

 

Seongwoo wanted to ask Minhyun if he has seen his own face, but he, very smartly, did not.

 

“But gossips is gonna spread about me having a bodyguard and it’ll just put people on the edge.” Seongwoo explains. He has gone through it once before, when his mom first took office and all the tabloids and news outlets suddenly become interested in Seongwoo’s mundane daily activities enough to follow him around with a camera. Mom assigned an agent from her security service to be posted at Seongwoo’s school in case the journalists get too handsy but a middle age guy in suit/tie and earpiece standing in perfect posture next to Seongwoo just makes every student tense like they are gonna get arrested directly under the President’s order if they even breathe too harshly around him. At least, Minhyun can blend in if he ditches his trench coat and starts dressing like a regular dude. “Look, I am gonna go out on a limb and say that you’ve probably done your research on these lecture halls as well, so you know that there is only one way in and out, which is through this door, so unless someone’s  gonna lift off the roof and does a Tom Cruise Mission Impossible style dropping in, it’d be fine if you just wait here, right?”

 

Minhyun looks like he wants to protest but he must have taken pity on Seongwoo because he nods solemnly with a short ‘Alright’.

 

“Great. That’s great.” Seongwoo nods along impulsively. “I’ll … see you after class?”

 

“Not going anywhere, sir.”

 

* * *

 

Only Woojin is at the lunch table, so Seongwoo sits across him and asks. “Where’s your demonic boyfriend?”

 

Woojin points a chopstick towards the Western stall without even looking up from his phone, and as expected, the demonic boyfriend is queueing at stall with Jaehwan.

 

And Hwang Minhyun is queueing just in front of Jihoon, looking entirely at ease.

 

Seongwoo had asked him earlier if he wanted to have lunch with Seongwoo and his friends, which to be honest was more of a courtesy quest and not a whole-hearted invitation, but Hwang Minhyun has politely declined, saying that he’ll be nearby.

 

Which, apparently, is the table across from where Seongwoo is sitting.

 

Seongwoo swears the girls sitting at the other end of the long table that Minhyun sat down swooned when he smiles at them. Well, it is good to know that at least one of them is comfortable and not at all going out of their mind in this whole thing, Seongwoo guesses.

 

Jihoon clangs his tray in front of Seongwoo, effectively blocking Seongwoo from seeing Minhyun, and the clattering conversation between him and Jaehwan redirects Seongwoo’s attention from his bodyguard to them.

 

“I am like 70% sure, Jihoon.” Jaehwan is saying. “You don’t trust me?”

 

“Why would I trust you of all people?” Jihoon scoffs. “You are just being paranoid. Seongwoo hyung, tell him he’s just being paranoid.”

 

“You’re just being paranoid.” Seongwoo repeats obediently. “What are you being paranoid about again?”

 

“I just …”

 

“He thinks someone is following him.” Jihoon cuts him off and says. “Which makes no sense because why would anyone go after him? Money? I’ve seen him trying to get the spare change someone dropped under the vending machine. An ex-lover? Sewoon hyung won’t even bother.”

 

“Or maybe he’s a serial killer who goes after young men with bright future.” Jaehwan insists. “You never know!”

 

“Erm,” Seongwoo interrupts them because he has a very bad feeling about this. “Who exactly is this potential serial-killer slash stalker you are talking about?”

 

“He’s actually sitting right across from you.” Jaehwan whispers dramatically with a shifty expression that just makes him look like a suspicious dumpling. “Just … like sneak a look between me and Jihoon, but don’t make it too obvious. See the guy in the coat.”

 

“I …” Seongwoo starts.

 

“So, see.” Jaehwan enthusiastically continues now that he has an audience. “I’ve noticed this guy around for like days, alright? And he is not from this school. I’ve checked with Daehwi.”

 

“Daehwi is an undergrad freshman.” Seongwoo reminds him.

 

“Yeah, but he somehow knows everyone.” Jaehwan insists. “He’s very powerful. Anyway, it is not just around campus, dude. I’ve seen him near our dorm as well, pretty late at night, just .. loitering.”

 

Well, apparently, Minhyun is right. Seongwoo is the one who is bad at noticing things.

 

“Maybe he’s dating someone from the dorm.” Jihoon offers an explanation.

 

“Have you seen him with anyone at all?” Jaehwan hisses back, and even Jihoon does not have a comeback for that. “Anyway, I sneaked a photo of him yesterday so if I keep seeing him around, I’ll report him to the campus security. Or maybe the police. Jiwoon from the campus security  is still mad at me for that time I accidentally broke one of the CCTVs.”

 

“ _Accidentally_.” Woojin scoffs. “You hit it with your guitar while you were drunk.”

 

“I was aiming at the mosquito.” Jaehwan rehashes his alibi. “So, Seongwoo hyung, if you see that guy anywhere, let me know, alright?”

 

“He is not a stalker.” Seongwoo sighs. “He’s with me.”

 

“You are dating him?” Three pairs of eyes blink at Seongwoo in surprise.

 

“No!” Seongwoo hisses. “I mean, he works for me. Well, not work, but he’s my bodyguard, starting from today. It’s just .. the power that be thinks I need a little protection with all the things happening in the government you know.”

 

“Oh,” Jaehwan plainly says after Seongwoo finishes explaining things unnecessarily.

 

“Yeah, and he was just … canvasing me, I guess. Get a feel of how he needs to .. you know … do his protection service thing for me.”

 

“Yeah, ok.” Jaehwan nods. “That makes sense.”

 

Even Woojin and Jihoon are nodding in agreement, and going back to their lunches.

 

“Really?” Seongwoo asks. “No mockery or smacktalk about the fact that I have a bodyguard?”

 

“Hyung, you are the First Son.” Jaehwan says and Seongwoo grimaces a little. They are friends first before Seongwoo’s mom even ran for office, but now Seongwoo is _the First Son_. “If anything, it’s more weird that you never have any kind of like bodyguard or secret service around you after the first few weeks.”

 

“I insisted on having none.” Seongwoo tells them; it was more of a beg and cry, actually, but they don’t need to know that. “But I guess the situation now is a little bit more serious so my mom has to have tighter security around her, and I can’t get out of it as well.”

 

“Well, good, because to be honest,” Jihoon lazily wraps his fork around his spaghetti and says. “I was only disagreeing with Jaehwan hyung because that dude is too hot to be a stalker.”

 

“Good to know where your priorities are, Jihoon.” Seongwoo scoffs.

 

“What?” Jihoon shrugs. “I can appreciate finer things in life. Call him over so I can ogle his face without any doubt that he might be a serial killer.”

 

Woojin rolls his eyes and Seongwoo just shakes his head.

 

“You two fought again, huh?”

 

“Who?” Jihoon blinks too innocently. “No idea what you are talking about.”

 

“I am talking about that strangely silent sparrow of yours.” Seongwoo nods his chin towards Woojin. “What is it this time?”

 

“I forgot to take out the trash.” Woojin mumbles.

 

“Erm. Correction.” Jihoon says primly. “You forgot to take out the _rotting_ trash even though it is your turn this week, and even after I have reminded you three separate times.”

 

“Dude, I was busy with the dance club thing!” Woojin protests.

 

“Well, maybe if you aren’t too busy teaching the girls at your dance club how to twerk, you might notice the putrid smell you had left me in.” Jihoon spits back.

 

“You know you have two hands and a perfectly functioning pair of legs to take it out by yourself if it is that bad, right?” Woojin throws down his chopsticks and says, and Jaehwan suddenly puts the entire cut of meat from his plate into his mouth, looking ready to run. Seongwoo regrets eating so slowly because he probably has to run soon as well, now that the regularly scheduled 2Park Brawl of the Week is in near future.

 

“Bitch, it was your turn!” Jihoon pounds his fist on the table, and Jaehwan jumps, muttering something about a practice session and scatters.

 

Coward.

 

“Maybe you two could talk it out ..” Seongwoo attempts to mediate but Woojin is already slamming down his soda glass, and talking a mile a minute in barely decipherable satoori (to anyone but Jihoon anyway) so Seongwoo takes that as his cue to exit and pick up his tray.

 

The two demons do not even bare him a glance.

 

Seongwoo needs better friends.

 

Minhyun looks surprised, the first time Seongwoo has seen him not that put-together since he shut the door in Minhyun’s face this morning, when Seongwoo sits down on the empty spot in front of him.

 

“My friends know.” Seongwoo says in lieu of hello. “That you are my bodyguard. And knowing them, it’d be half a day before the whole campus, or at least everyone in my programme will know about it as well.”

 

“Oh,” Minhyun mutters. Seongwoo notices that he finally has that ridiculous coat off, which is somehow even worse for Seongwoo because now instead of being bewildered by Hwang Minhyun’s absurd choice of clothing, he has to face the very well defined chest and shoulders underneath a thin white dress shirt.

 

Seongwoo is not straight enough for this.

 

“I thought you wanted to keep it lowkey.” Minhyun says like they are having a secret raunchy rendezvous instead of Minhyun just simply working for Seongwoo. Seongwoo blames the chest (and the shoulders, god, the shoulders) for even thinking such thoughts.

 

“Well, it was either that or I bail you out at the police station.” Seongwoo answers, focusing on his soggy noodles instead of Minhyun. The noodles, sadly, do not look as appealing.

 

Minhyun looks confused, but he is a better man than Seongwoo because he just nods and says. “I’ll take your words for it.”

 

“And I am gonna have to tell Jaehwan eventually if you are gonna be around 24/7 anyway. You know him, right? My dorm mate?”

 

“I know. I have looked into him as well.”

 

“Found anything I can use for blackmail or just pure humiliation?”

 

“Well, I am afraid that is confidential.” Minhyun smiles again, the audacity. “I can however say that he is in the green threshold, meaning NIS believe he is of no threat to you.”

 

“You guys obviously haven’t heard him laugh in the middle of the night while I am sleeping.” Seongwoo mutters under his breath.

 

“Hyung, I thought you have left.”

 

Seongwoo turns his head to see Jihoon standing next to the table, hand in hand with Woojin. Well, that was a quick one so at least Seongwoo does not have to worry about a sulky Jihoon later during their theatre meetup.

 

“Still eating.” Seongwoo pokes at his noodles that he is sure he won’t be eating anymore, but Jihoon’s attention is already on Minhyun.

 

“Hi!”

 

Minhyun gives him a very robotic smile. “Hello.”

 

“I am Jihoon, Seongwoo’s hyung’s most treasured dongsaeng.”

 

“He really is not,” Seongwoo assures Minhyun.

 

“And this is Woojin, my boyfriend.” Jihoon finishes with a clasp onto Woojin’s biceps like they were not yelling in each other’s face just five minutes back. Woojin just patiently gives his trademark ‘I-am-the-little-brother-you-have-always-wanted’ smile.

 

If it were Seongwoo, he definitely would not be going around introducing his _boyfriend_ to strangers, especially strangers who are licensed to carry, but Jihoon has always been stupidly brave, Woojin even more so.

 

Seongwoo sometimes envies them.

 

“It’s good to meet you.” Minhyun replies, his tone neither too rude nor too inviting for anything more than a customary greeting. Jihoon raises an eyebrow, but probably thinks better and says bye to the both of them before leaving, still hand-in-hand with Woojin.

 

“I assume you have looked into them as well?” Seongwoo asks as Minhyun quietly finishes his fish and chips.

 

“I have.” Minhyun confirms but does not elaborate.  Seongwoo kind of wants to ask if the two Parks rank above or below threat level compared to Jaehwan. But Minhyun is already talking about scheduling a bug sweep at the dorm in the next few days, so Seongwoo just keeps his curiosity to himself and nods along.

 

Minhyun leaves the table after he finishes his meal and comes back shortly with a coke can and a water bottle in hand before pushing the ice cold can towards Seongwoo. Seongwoo takes it with a thanks and thinks maybe having Hwang Minhyun around is not that bad after all.


	3. Chapter 3

Jaehwan’s response when Seongwoo tells him that they need to have a bug sweep at their dorm is that “Do we need to clean our place first?”

 

Seongwoo does not think it is strictly necessary, but still, he asks Minhyun just to be sure.

 

Minhyun looks very torn, an expression Seongwoo has learned over the past two days as one where Minhyun is restraining himself to not say something that might cross the line or offend Seongwoo in ways more than Minhyun is already doing with his surprisingly frequent snarky comments.

 

“What is it?” Seongwoo asks, throwing an oreo pack into his basket. Minhyun really meant it when he said he’d be accompanying Seongwoo anywhere, even on his night snack runs.

 

“You don’t need to clean your place. The sweep will take maybe 20 minutes, but I think you should clean it anyway, for your own sake.”

 

“Wow,” Seongwoo comments. “Are you calling us dirty?”

 

Minhyun’s mouth forms a hard-pressed line. “No?”

 

“You are a terrible liar. How’d you even become a spy?” Seongwoo scoffs.

 

“I’m not a spy.” Minhyun replies and puts a dozen pack of health bars into the basket. “I am an intelligence agent.”

 

“In other words, a  _ spy _ .” Seongwoo mouths back. “You’d better be paying for your own shit, by the way. I am too broke for your tasteless but expensive health bars.”

 

“Yes, sir.” Minhyun replies simply.

 

“How’s your room?” Seongwoo asks they reach to the short line at the convenience store next to his dorm. It is an hour past midnight so there are only two people in front of him, both of them tired and grouchy students.

 

“It’s one of the best accomodations I’ve been assigned to, outside of hotels.” Minhyun answers.

 

“Really?” Seongwoo turns to him asks. “If a 200 sq-ft room is your idea of best accommodation, I’d hate to see what your idea of  _ bad  _ is.”

 

“I’ve just been in a lot worse places,” Minhyun just shrugs and helps to take out the mostly sugar and empty calories worth of snacks that Seongwoo had gotten for himself. 

 

“Ok, you can’t just say that and not follow up with a story or stories.” Seongwoo tells him.

 

“I was saying it as a fact, and not as an opening to a story.” Minhyun replies, and pays with his credit card. Seongwoo wants to protest but whatever. If it is too much, Minhyun can always claim it back from Sungwoon. Sungwoo owes him a treat or two for all the shits he had put Seongwoo through. “Plus, I don’t believe you have the level of security clearance to know my stories, sir.”

 

“You know everytime I start to think you are a normal person,” Seongwoo rolls his eyes and grabs a plastic bag out of Minhyun’s hand. “You go and pull this shit.”

 

“I am a normal person.” Minhyun protests.

 

“Uh-huh,” Seongwoo says, unconvinced. He went back to read the file Sungwoon sent to him on Minhyun after a few days because he got curious. Minhyun has enlisted in the Navy when he was 18, as soon as he was eligible, in fact; rose through the ranks pretty quickly for a young blood, before he was recruited by the National Intelligence Security organization. And everything after that was redacted after redacted like Minhyun’s past three years of life is just one big red tape. His specialities listed are languages and tracking so Seongwoo assumed he spent a lot of those three years abroad.

 

It is sometimes just almost too absurd to think that the guy next to him, the guy who is in his button down shirt and slacks even at 1 in the morning, carrying a plastic bag full of red bull cans, is a guy who Seongwoo is supposed to be trusting with his life, and a guy who probably has gone through shit - both physically and mentally - that Seongwoo couldn’t even imagine. They are even the same age for crying out loud - some birth month in fact, like Seongwoo is maybe 15 days younger than him. And yet here he is, not able to throw a single punch to save his life while Minhyun is just … Hwang Minhyun, NIS agent extraordinaire. 

 

Seongwoo is not used to feeling incompetent because he has led a pretty good life so far but Hwang Minhyun has a way to making him feel some types of ways, ones that Seongwoo does not particularly enjoy.

 

“I’ll arrange the sweep for tomorrow, well, today 10 am?” Minhyun asks as they reach Seongwoo’s door and Seongwoo fumbles for his keys. 

 

“If you want us to clean our place first,” Seongwoo says and takes off his shoes to head inside. The dining table has not a single space left with all the unwashed dishes and Seongwoo’s dialogue notes, and bits and pieces of snack pack/tissue boxes/empty soju bottles, and ok yeah, Seongwoo kind of sees Minhyun’s point. “Might as well just schedule it for the day after. It took me and Jaehwan a whole nine hours the last time we tried to clean out the dorm.”

 

“Why don’t you just call over the housekeeping service from Blue House?” Minhyun casually suggests and what.

 

“That’s an option?” Seongwoo blinks. “There is a housekeeping service that I can use?”

 

“Yeah,” Minhyun nods. “Ministers and high-level personnel uses it all the time. Are you not familiar?”

 

“No, but are you sure I can use it? Like isn’t it only for official purpose or something like that?”

 

“You are the First Son.” Minhyun shrugs. 

 

“Yeah, but it’s my dorm room, you know. Not like my room in the Blue House. Never mind. I’ll check with Sungwoon hyung first tomorrow.”

 

Minhyun is silent for a while before finally nodding. “Up to you, sir. I’ll shift the sweep session to 2 pm anyway, just to give you some more sleeping time in the morning.”

 

“Thanks, but you wanted to say something, don’t you?” Seongwoo asks. 

 

“I …” 

 

“Go on, spit it out.” Seongwoo says. “You have that look on your face.”

 

“I think,” Minhyun starts, picking up his health bars. “I think you are interesting, that’s all.”

 

“Interesting?” Seongwoo repeats after him. “Me?”

 

Most of the times, when people describe him, it is more of handsome or funny if they want to be nice, clumsy or slow if they don’t. Interesting is not a trait Seongwoo has particularly associated with himself.

 

“I have dealt with a lot of different people, sir.” Minhyun continues. “You know, from the top 1% of society to some top governmental personnels, and I’d say a First Son is as top 1% as I can get, but you are a little less, how should I put it?”

 

“Stuck up?” Seongwoo suggests.

 

“Conscious.” Minhyun finishes his sentences. “I think you are very much aware of who you are and makes a conscious effort to not act on it. I think it is very interesting, not good or bad, just … interesting.”

 

“Well,” Seongwoo busies himself with the plastic bag in his hand because he is strangely feeling a little flustered. “If you think it is interesting that I don’t act like a rich kid, it’s because I’m not. I mean, my mom was the Finance Minister before she ran for office. Her financial rules were stricter at home than at the National treasury, trust me.”

 

“It’s not about money or your very terrible ways of spending it,” Minhyun says and points at the dusty hoverboard that is laying on the floor next to the TV console, the one that Seongwoo bought because he was curious, but never gets around actually riding it.

 

“Hey!” Seongwoo protests with a murmur. He has no idea how Minhyun sometimes hesitates to say what he is thinking to Seongwoo when he regularly goes and says this kind of shit. “At last, it looks nice and Jihoon got a couple of rides out of it, ok?”

 

“I just mean the way you look at things, and the way you … live, I guess.”

 

“Not a very First Son material, huh?” Seongwoo laughs down at himself.

 

“It is nice.” Minhyun adds in. “You are a nice person, one of the nicer people I’ve been assigned to, sir.”

 

“Oh, I..” Seongwoo flutters. “Thank you?”

 

“Have a good night, sir. I’ll be back around 10 if you want to have your breakfast outside.”

 

“Let’s see.” Seongwoo answers non-committedly. “You have a good night too.”

 

Minhyun nods before leaving with his tasteless health bars, and Seongwoo closes the door after him, feeling a little bit more lightheaded than when the night started.

 

He has never been  _ interesting  _ to a person before. 

 

He kind of likes it.

 

* * *

 

Sungwoon says he can use the Housekeeping service from Blue House every month or so, which should be more than enough because Seongwoo does not even clean his place every three months. 

 

Jaehwan is just coming out of the shower when Seongwoo got off the phone with Sungwoon and after arranging the housekeeping team to drop by in an hour.

 

And with the way Jaehwan just walks around one noticeably dusty area of the floor in front of the bathroom means they really do need that service.

 

“Hey, we are cleaning out the place today.” Seongwoo informs, and Jaehwan snaps his head to stare at him, hands rubbing a towel on his wet hair.

 

“Hyung, I don’t have time. I am going for that busking thing.”

 

“Not us.” Seongwoo answers and opens up a red bull. Red bull for breakfast? Why the fuck not? “Apparently, I can use the housekeeping service from Blue House as long as it is not more than six hours a session.”

 

“What the fuck?” Jaehwan blinks. “You mean we’ve been walking in dirt all this time while you have a team of maids just sitting around?”

 

“Or you can just vacuum it yourself.” Seongwoo rolls his eyes.

 

“Well, why would I do that when I have Blue House on speed dial?”

 

“You have Blue House on speed dial?” Seongwoo scrunches his nose.

 

“No,” Jaehwan shrugs. “But I have you and that’s kind of the same thing.”

 

“Asshole,” Seongwoo scoffs. “And we are doing that bug sweep thing later. I think they are gonna have to sweep your room too, bro. Sorry.”

 

“No biggie.” Jaehwan shrugs. “Hey, can they try to find that one small mic I took from the Props department and then lost it? It should be somewhere in my room.”

 

“It’s a bug sweep, dude, not a treasure hunt.”

 

“They’d still pick up on cameras or microphones, won’t they?” Jaehwan scratches his head.

 

“Not the ones that are not recording, idiot..” Seongwoo shakes his head. 

 

“Yeah, well, whatever,” Jaehwan shrugs. “I already told Sejeong I’d pay for it back anyway. Hey, by the way, we are going to a club or bar depending on the vibes later, after my busking thing. We are meeting at the Pizza Pub around 8.”

 

“Not sure, dude.” Seongwoo grimaces a little. “I mean, I’ve got Minhyun and all.”

 

“He’s your bodyguard.” Jaehwan makes a face. “Not an underage kid you have to worry about bringing to a club. C’mon. Woojin wants to go dancing before the midterms.”

 

“Woojin wants to go dancing anytime.” Seongwoo scoffs. “I’ll see how later, alright?”

 

“Urgh, fine, but I am sending Jihoon later if you don’t turn up.”

 

Yeah, that essentially means Seongwoo is going after getting a few kicks in the ass. Jaehwan can be surprisingly evil at times. 

 

Actually, going out does not sound that bad. Seongwoo has been immersed in his poetry thing and his upcoming musical lately. He would not mind just having fun for a night out. He just worries about what Minhyun is going to say, but then the image of Minhyun being annoyed under the neon lights of a club while drunk people trashes around him is something too ridiculous to not experience in person so Seongwoo gives Jaehwan an affirmative nod and decides to do laundry today so he can wear his better jeans. 

 

* * *

 

“Wow, this floor is originally white?” Minhyun exclaims when Seongwoo comes out of his bedroom, laundry basket in hand. 

 

“Ha ha.” Seongwoo laughs soulessly. “Appreciate it before it gets covered by two layers of dust again.”

 

“I’ve never been worried more about a threat.” Minhyun deadpans as Seongwoo rolls his eyes and heads out to the common laundry room in the basement. 

 

“I actually need to go and sign in the Sweep team.” Minhyun says. “They are bringing heavy equipments so the school wants them to check in first.”

 

“Sure, go ahead.” Seongwoo nods. “Don’t worry, Mr. Hwang. I doubt any assassin is waiting to kill me in the barely 2 ft wide laundry room.”

 

“I am more worried about you injuring yourself actually, sir.” Minhyun says and Seongwoo seriously considers throwing his dirty pair of pants at Minhyun’s face.

 

* * *

 

Seongwoo did injure himself in the laundry room but it is just a toe stub on one of the dryers so no biggie. This is just one of the milder random and often self-incurring injuries he gets on a daily basis. 

 

When he gets back to his room, there is a stranger lady weidling one of those metal detector things the Airport security uses in his living room, so he guesses the ‘Sweep’ is in full motion.

 

Actually, it is not as much of a commotion as he is expecting. There is another guy in the kitchen tuning (?) this heavy black box that looks more like a DJ set to Seongwoo than some kind of advanced technological equipment thingamabob. And that’s it. Just two agents going to town on his furnitures and appliances.

 

Minhyun is in Seongwoo’s bedroom, waving a similar metal stick over Seongwoo’s bed frame. Seongwoo’s bedroom has been cleaned to the last speck of dust, and his bed was made so primly that it looks like one of those hashtag ideal bedroom posts you’d see on instagram or pinterest, and with Minhyun hovering around it in his folded-sleeve shirt and pushed up hair; it just paints a perfect picture, the kind Seongwoo wants to take and keep it for aesthetic purposes.

 

“Don’t ruin my bed.” Seongwoo warns and Minhyun looks up. 

 

“All clear, sir.”

 

“What a relief.” Seongwoo deadpans but Minhyun doesn’t respond and moves onto his desk, waving over his notes and books that are stack neatly and his laptop that is aligned in perfect parallel state to the edge of his desk. 

 

Minhyun picks up a couple of books on his desk, including a very familiar black notebook and shit, Seongwoo forgot he left that on his desk because he was writing last night before going to bed. 

 

“Don’t ..” Seongwoo yells a little and Minhyun looks back at him in curiosity. “...read it.”

 

Minhyun’s face does not betray any expression - he just puts the books in his hand back down onto the table calmly. “Don’t worry, sir. I won’t intrude on any private things.” 

 

“It’s not … well, it kind of is. Sorry.” Seongwoo blubbers. 

 

“Sir.” Minhyun calls him again. “I won’t read your diary even if I have the chance to. You can trust me.”

 

“It’s not a diary.” Seongwoo blurts out. “It’s just … it’s just poems. I write sometimes.”

 

“Oh,” Minhyun raises an eyebrow. “Well, I am completely surprised given that you are taking two poetry classes right now.”

 

Asshole.

 

“They are just a little personal, ok? And embarrassing.” Seongwoo mutters. He is not ready for the world to read his poems yet, well, not until the next three months anyway. 

 

“Your bedroom is all good.” Minhyun just says and leaves him there to go and sweep Jaehwan’s room. 

 

“Hey, by the way,” Seongwoo follows him and says. “I guess when you said you’d accompany me to social gatherings, clubs are included?”

 

“You are going clubbing?” Minhyun simply asks. 

 

“Yeah, tonight.”

 

“Alright.” Minhyun nods. “I’ll have to come with you, of course. Do you have a table reserved? If not, I’d suggest something close to the Exit points, just to follow protocols.”

 

“No,” Seongwoo scrunches his nose. “We are all pretty broke. A standing table or the bar is probably the choice of the night.”

 

“Well, it’s not ideal,” Minhyun shrugs. “But not the worst thing.”

 

Seongwoo gives him one outing with the two Parks to change his mind, but he doesn’t say it out loud. 

 

“Do you know where you are going?”

 

“Probably NB2. You’ve been there before?” Seongwoo asks.

 

“No, but I’ve been to Vulture next door.”

 

“Wait. Really?” Seongwoo blinks. He would not have taken Minhyun for the clubbing type. 

 

“Yeah. I was on a drug bust.”

 

Right. There it is.

 

“So, you were doing drug busts while people probably same age as you were doing said drugs? That sounds kinda sad.”

 

Minhyun shrugs. “They were a lot younger, surprisingly.”

 

“Well, that’s depressing.” Seongwoo comments. “Anyway, I hoped you did see how people dress at clubs during your drug bust and come dressed appropriately.”

 

“There is no need for me to blend in.” Minhyun says and turns off his stick of doom, apparently satisfied with Jaehwan’s room. 

 

“Well, maybe not.” Seongwoo argues, following him into the living room. “But it’d be weird.”

 

“Do people recognize you when you go out like that?” Minhyun turns and asks. 

 

“Sometimes, yeah.” Seongwoo admits. He does have to appear with his mom in the news sometimes for diplomatic or PR purposes so some people do recognize his face sometimes. “Why?”

 

“Then people won’t think it’s too weird for the First Son to go clubbing with his bodyguard around.”

 

“Yeah I know.. But …” Seongwoo mutters. “But I don’t like it?”

 

“You don’t like the way I dress?” Minhyun asks.

 

“No, I…. it’s fine. You are fine. I mean, the way you dress is absolutely fine, but I don’t know, I just feel bad we are going out but you are dressed like you are on duty.”

 

“I will be on duty, sir.” Minhyun reminds him.

 

“I know,” Seongwoo whines. “But I don’t like it.”

 

Minhyun raises his eyebrows. “Well then, I’ll see what I can do.”


	4. Chapter 4

“Hyung!” Jihoon clasped him on the back, which almost topples Seongwoo over because Jihoon does not know how to control his own strength sometimes. “How does your bodyguard get even hotter?”

 

“Did you fight with Woojin again?” Seongwoo narrows his eyes and asks.

 

“No, he’s getting me a drink.” Jihoon says and turns around until he is facing Minhyun who is standing a respectable distance away from them, but Seongwoo gives him only until the peak hour hits and the bar area is crawling with drunkards and clubgoers, all thirsty for an overpriced quench at the bar. “Just because I am in love with my boyfriend does not mean I suddenly do not notice any other hot dude.”

 

“I thought love was supposed to be blinding.” Seongwoo scoffs. 

 

“What do you even know about love?” Jihoon laughs.

 

“Ok, Mr. I-have-been-dating-the-same-guy-since-high-school.” Seongwoo rolls his eyes. “You don’t get to look down on the rest of us because we don’t fall in love with our Best friend at the ripe age of 17, ok?”

 

“I wasn’t looking down on anyone.” Jinhoon shrugs. “I was just making a commentary on how hot your bodyguard dude is. Hey, quick question, if you faint in front of him, will he carry you bride style, your head on his very well-defined chest?”

 

“You have very strange fantasies, Jihoon.” Seongwoo shakes his head. “Has anyone ever told you that?”

 

“Yeah, Woojin.”

 

“Alrightttt, nevermind.” Seongwoo turns back to his beer and looks over at Minhyun, who did listen to Seongwoo and did not turn up dressed like a salaryman. But somehow, this is even worse because he is dressed in a white shirt and bomber jacket combo that does not have any right to look as good as it does on Minhyun. 

 

“He’s gonna get drowned in the sea of people in like twenty minutes.” Jihoon comments.

 

“I told him, but he said he’d give us some privacy.” Seongwoo snorts.

 

“In a club?” Jihoon laughs. 

 

“Yeah, I don’t think he thought that one through.” Seongwoo comments as Woojin and Jaehwan come back from the bar with a couple of drinks and a couple of freshmen. God, Seongwoo is too old to be hanging out with these younglings. 

 

But then the music plays and Seongwoo kind of loses himself. He has always enjoyed this - not necessarily the expensive drinks and people stepping on his toes, but being among seas of people as high as him, just absorbing the adrenaline around him and jumping to the beat blasting out of the speakers in thumps that pumps along with the beat of his heart. Seongwoo dances with Woojin for a while but even Seongwoo who gets as hype as one can get in a hype-beat club cannot match Woojin’s overflowing energy so he leaves Woojin to the mercy of Jihoon, who totally is not having the time of his life grinding onto his boyfriend. He gets another beer that one of the freshmen opened for him (Jinyoung, he thinks - he will be better with names when there is no alcohol and smoke and just noise in his systems). Jaehwan gets tired even faster than Seongwoo so he is already at the bar. Seongwoo dances by himself for a while, smiling and welcoming anyone who is, well, interested. He is obviously not going to go home with anyone because that is just inviting trouble, but it is fun to flirt and have fun and just people who are attracted to him and who he is attracted to. 

 

Well, until someone grabs him from the behind and starts yelling at him in his face. The bass is thumping so loudly that Seongwoo cannot hear anything clearly but he can piece together that the girl who he just dances with quite .. raunchily apparently fails to mention that she has a boyfriend and said boyfriend who probably has at least 8 cm on Seongwoo is also at this club.

 

“Look, dude!” Seongwoo yells over the noise. “I didn’t know, alright? She came onto me first.”

 

Oh, wow, ok. Dude is mad as hell because he gets into Seongwoo’s face even more, like Seongwoo can lean in and kiss him on the lips - he probably would get punched in the face but he totally can, just saying. 

 

And then, there is a body between them and Minhyun is holding the guy at arm’s length while simultaneously shielding Seongwoo behind him.

 

Oh, right. Bodyguard. Minhyun is supposed to be guarding Seongwoo’s body. 

 

Seongwoo kind of wants to see Minhyun punches the douche in the face because first of all, he bets it’d be hot to see Minhyun punches someone, and second of all, the guy is just annoying. It is also possible that Seongwoo might be a little bit more drunk than he thought he was because he is stumbling behind Minhyun, until Minhyun reaches an arm back to hold him steady. 

 

Minhyun’s grip on his arm feels like a chokehold and Seongwoo wonders how fucking strong Hwang Minhyun actually is.

 

He is saying something to the guy but it is too noisy and stuffy for Seongwoo to catch all of his words. He just heard something about trouble and threats and leaving. The guy looks like he wants to punch both of them in the face but Minhyun’s arm holding across his chest like a deterrent might be working something because Seongwoo’s face is still free of punches even after the guy finishes snarling at them. He weirdly looks like a chubbier version of Mushu from Mulan.

 

Minhyun says something like ‘Leave now’ and gives the guy a push back. The guy flares his nostrils and turns to leave, but not without spitting at Minhyun, and what the fuck…

 

Seongwoo sees red for a second, and rushes forward but Minhyun’s hold on him is too strong. 

 

“What the hell, asshole!” Seongwoo yells after him but the guy just turns around and raises his two middle fingers.

 

“Don’t.” Minhyun grabs at him when Seongwoo attempts to go and jump kick the guy in the nuts or something.

 

“He can’t do that to people!” Seongwoo turns back to Minhyun and yells, but Minhyun is frustratingly calm, already having finished wiping at his face with the sleeve of his jacket.

 

“Don’t mind him. I’ll keep an eye on him for the night.”

 

“No, fuck it. I am not in the mood anymore.” Seongwoo grumbles and stomps out of the crowd of people, which now feels just suffocating and irritating now that his high has been effectively ruined.

 

“Do you .. want to head back or just stay at the bar?” Minhyun comes out after him and asks. Seongwoo wants to shake him by the front of his jacket and asks if he does not get angry or how can he just stand there and take it while he can probably kill that asshole in a second flat?

 

“I think … I don’t know. Let’s go back. Wait, shit. I can’t.” Seongwoo groans. He is the designated driver. Well, technically, Minhyun would be the one driving, but it is Seongwoo’s car. Woojin and Jihoon probably would take a taxi back because they live off campus but he is supposed to bring back Jaehwan and the freshmen.

 

“I think I am just gonna wait in the car.” Seongwoo says decisively after checking the time. It is already closing to three and when he saw Jaehwan last time, he was already out of breath and sweating, so it’s not gonna be long before he gives up and crawls out of the club.

 

“Ok.” Minhyun nods and silently follows Seongwoo out through the thong of people. Seongwoo thinks he really is drunk because he is feeling a phantom hand hovering across his waist until he is out of the club, breathing the air that is not 60% smoke. 

 

“I am sorry.” Seongwoo says as they head towards the parking lot across the club. “For getting in a fight.”

 

“From what I saw, you did not.” Minhyun shrugs. “You were provoked.”

 

“Well, yeah,” Seongwoo laughs and kicks a small stone in his path. “But do you think the tabloids are gonna care when they run that story?”

 

“Do you think he recognized you?”

 

“Who knows?” Seongwoo shrugs. “Maybe not now, but he can see my face in anywhere online and realises.”

 

“I believe there are CCTV cameras inside the club. If things reach that stage, we can prepare something.”

 

“We’ll see.” Seongwoo sighs and gets into the car. “I should have just stayed at home. Less risky.”

 

“Don’t worry about it too much.” Minhyun says as he climbs into the driver seat next to Seongwoo. “I’ll send someone to get the footage from the club tomorrow.”

 

“Ok.” Seongwoo nods. “Is it bad that I am mostly scared of Sungwoon hyung and not anything else when I think about this thing getting out?”

 

“I’d say that’s a realistic fear, sir. The chief of staff is a very .. intimidating person.”

 

“You can probably throw him across the room.” Seongwoo laughs.

 

“I can but I will be too afraid to even try it.” Minhyun laughs along, and Seongwoo realises that this is probably the first time Seongwoo has seen him laugh without any mockery or fakeness to it. 

 

“You know who you should have thrown across the room?” Seongwoo asks. 

 

“I can guess,” Minhyun answers and takes a tissue from the tissue box on the dashboard to dab at the wet spot on his shirt.

 

“He fucking spat on you, dude.” Seongwoo says through grit teeth, suddenly angry again. “And I know you can probably like, I don’t know, throw him down or kick him in the face. You should have, actually.”

 

“He was just looking for a reason to start a fight. I wasn’t about to give him one. I didn’t train for years to fight a spoiled brat in a club.” Minhyun calmly replies.

 

“Yeah? Well, I am sure you didn’t train to get spat on a spoiled brat in a club either.” Seongwoo mumbles. “What did you train for? To serve and protect this great nation?”

 

Minhyun laughs again. “No, nothing that noble. It was pretty self-serving, actually.”

 

“What is it?” Seongwoo turns his body halfway and asks. “Did you want to like get a ripped body to impress the girls at school or something?”

 

“I did it to run away from home.”

 

Well, that escalated quickly.

 

Seongwoo can only replies with an  _ oh  _ because what the fuck do you even say to something like this, but Minhyun turns to face him with a gentle smile on his face. 

 

“It wasn’t anything bad.” He says. “I was just .. my family and I didn’t always see eye to eye on what I should do for my life, mostly because I didn’t know it myself. So, I joined the army as soon as I am eligible so I’d have at least two years before they start pushing me through college and family business and all that comes with it. But, as it turns out I am really good at the army thing so I continued, and then I got recruited. Everything else since then is in my file.”

 

“Yeah, with a lot of red tape.” Seongwoo mumbles. “How is your family now? Are they ..happy? With who you are? Where you are right now?”

 

Normally, Seongwoo would not ask such personal question because Minhyun always seems to draw the line between business and person pretty clearly, but this is both the longest and the most personal thing Minhyun has talked to him about so he wants to probe a little more.

 

“I guess.” Minhyun nods. “It’s a little difficult to complain about your son working in the top Intelligent Agency in the country, I guess. Plus, my job requires me to not be at home 300 days out of a year so that really limits the time for argument and disappointment, you know.”

 

Seongwoo’s mom has always been nothing but supportive of Seongwoo’s inclinations in regards to his life. She has never pushed him to be as book smart as she is or as ambitious as she is even if he is an only child. Seongwoo has always been more than thankful to her for that because he cannot imagine his life doing something he does not have his heart in. He is too emotionally fragile for that. 

 

“Tell them you save the First Son from embarrassing himself in front of a hundred people because he cannot throw a punch.” He says to Minhyun, just to lighten up a little bit. “I bet they’d be real proud.”

 

Minhyun smiles. “We can work on that punch during our gym session on weekend.”

 

“Ergh, do we have to?” Seongwoo groans.

 

“It’d be good for you to a few things about self-defense even if it’s just the basics.” Minhyun says. “I am not gonna be always here, sir.”

 

Seongwoo does not know why that makes him a little sad.


	5. Chapter 5

It takes a little more than two weeks, but Seongwoo gets used to having Minhyun around. Granted, Minhyun is very conscious to not be in Seongwoo’s way but it is difficult to not notice when you have someone constantly around you and watching your every move, and especially when that someone looks like Hwang Minhyun. But as they go through the motion, Seongwoo gets used to Minhyun waking him up in the morning (and by extension, he gets used to the doorbell ringing at 8:30 on the dot in the mornings), and doing torturing laps and boxing jabs in the gym every week (ok, he lies. He is never going to get used to this one) and even Jaehwan gets used to Minhyun just staying in the living room while they are at home (or outside the door when they have friends over - which Seongwoo feels bad about, but Minhyun repeatedly insists that it is ok and standard).

 

And Minhyun also suggests Seongwoo joins him in those weird meditation exercises because he thinks Seongwoo spaces out a lot (which is true) and cannot focus enough to be aware his surroundings (which is also true). And to his own credit, Seongwoo did try once, but he got so bored after a couple of minutes that he just starts picking on the small skin peel on his thumb and ends up making it bleed so yeah, not his thing. He will just take up knitting or something.

 

The bad side of having a personal bodyguard, however, is having no privacy.

 

And also, when you are pretty sure you have a (tiny) crush on your personal bodyguard, but Seongwoo is pretty sure that is his own personal hell-making, and not a common theme. He is not entirely surprised though because he would have to be blind and very dangerously straight to not be attracted to someone that looks like Hwang Minhyun, and then Minhyun has the nerve to go and be considerate, funny (sometimes, but not when he tries to be), dependable, and looks soul crushingly good in a pair of runner shorts, so really Seongwoo never stood a chance.

 

But going back to the privacy thing, Minhyun is very respectful of Seongwoo’s space and privacy; there is no doubt about that. But sometimes, when a guy is just angry and wants to punch something or yell at the sky because the world is just full of assholes, it is difficult to do that with a bodyguard around.

 

“I am going for a drive.” Seongwoo says, fist clenching his car keys. He just got off the phone with Hyun Woo and you know what, fuck Hyun Woo. Seongwoo does not care if he is a senior. Fuck him and his lies. “I need to clear my head for a while.”

 

Minhyun looks up from the book he is reading in Seongwoo’s living room. He has been bringing a book or two lately, usually at nights when Seongwoo is staying in. Seongwoo guesses even a NIS agent gets bored having nothing to do but stands guard.

 

“I don’t think you are in any condition to drive.” Minhyun comments. “Did something happen?”

 

“I am fine.” Seongwoo grits out.“Fucking peachy.”

 

“I will drive.” Minhyun stands up and holds out his hand. “Give me the keys.”

 

“No, look, I’ll just drive around the campus, alright? I won’t go far.” Seongwoo says, frustrated. “I kind of want to be alone right now.”

 

“I am sorry sir.” Minhyun shakes his head. “I cannot let you do that. I will, however, not ask you any question and just drives wherever you want to go. Please give me the car keys.”

 

Seongwoo grunts but shoves the keys into Minhyun’s palms because he is still clear headed enough to know that Minhyun is right. He probably will speed or crash into something when his head is mostly filled with anger.

 

Minhyun, true to his words, does not ask any question apart from where Seongwoo wants to go, but Seongwoo just asks him to drive around, maybe a bit out of the city where there is less traffic so Seongwoo has less noise and ambience to calm himself down.

 

Hyun Woo really did get him good, lying to him after all this time and suddenly dropping a bomb on him like this at the last minute.

 

Fuck. People suck.

 

“I know I said I wouldn’t ask any question,” Minhyun says from the driver seat. “But has anything bad happen? Is there something I should know from a safety perspective?”

 

“If you are talking about somebody else’s safety because I am planning that somebody’s murder in my head right now, yeah.” Seongwoo grits out. “Hey, you are a spy. Do you know what is the most painful way to kill a person?”

 

“I am not a spy, sir.” Minhyun reminds him. “Should I be taking any precautions for the next days? Are you going to be misusing your gym practices into a fight?”

 

“If only,” Seongwoo grunts and shoves his back into the car seat, trying to sink into the seat as much as possible.

 

“I..” Seongwoo starts and then stops to wonder if he should just tell Minhyun because he surely cannot talk to anyone else about this. Probably Jaehwan but he would not get it. “I had a publisher.”

 

“Like a literary publisher?” Minhyun asks.

 

“Yeah, for my poems. I got the contact through my TA last semester. That guy says the publishing house loves my work and would like to have a deal with me to publish a first collection of sorts.”

 

“That..” Minhyun says. “..sounds amazing actually.”

 

“Yeah,” Seongwoo scoffs. “Right up until I have to sign the deal. My one condition is that I got to use a pseudonym because I want people to read my poems, not the First Son’s. And he said they agreed, until I got the contract and read it over. And you know what the worst thing is?”

 

“What?”

 

“He didn’t even tell me. Hyun Woo… this guy, my contact, he just emailed me the contract and told me to sign it. If I didn’t read over the contract terms myself, I wouldn’t have even notice that the publishing house claims the right to publish my work under the name they choose.”

 

“That’s not very professional of him.”

 

“No shit.” Seongwoo scoffs. “So, I called him to ask what the fuck was up with those terms, and that I am not signing the contract like that and then he just set off, told me he hooked me up with a publisher in the first place because he knows a poem collections from the First Son will probably sell. Then, he has the nerves to give me some backhanded compliments like _oh your work is pretty fine but you know, you need a selling point_. He could have just come out and said it is not good enough.”

 

“That’s not true.” Minhyun says placatingly.

 

“You don’t even know what kind of dogshit I wrote.” Seongwoo mumbles and rolls down the window. He vaguely notices that they are heading towards Incheon, which is nice. The weather is clear tonight and the air is just fresh enough here for Seongwoo to calm down a little.

 

“No, I haven’t seen any of your work, but your grades are the highest in your poetry classes, and I don’t think any respectable publisher is going to be thinking about publishing, as you call it, a pile of dogshit just because the writer behind it is an important person.”

 

“Well, maybe it is a not so respectable publishing house after all.” Seongwoo mumbles. “It is already difficult enough for me to approach any publisher because I can only send in my works under a pseudonym and I have feeling they are throwing most of the submissions from newbies into the trash pile.”

 

“I thought there are student submissions to publishers via your school. I have seen the posters around campus.” Minhyun says.

 

“There are, but I obviously have to send in with my real name.”

 

“And what is so wrong with that?” Minhyun asks, and Seongwoo blinks at him.

 

“Did you not hear a word I’ve just said? I don’t want people to pick up my work because my mother happens to be the most powerful woman in the country.”

 

“Can I say something frankly?” Minhyun asks. “Something that might seems a little personal than it is appropriate?”

 

“Dude,” Seongwoo says. “I have unloaded too much personal shit on you in like the last 10 minutes, so yeah, go nuts.”

 

“I think,” Minhyun starts slowly, like he is choosing his words very carefully. Seongwoo is suddenly not so sure if he wants to listen to what Minhyun has to say after all. “I think we both know that you are very privileged. Maybe you did not ask for it or do not even want it, but you are. You have the money, the status, and is educated enough and is doing what you love.”

 

“Thanks?” Seongwoo says unsurely. “Is that supposed to make me feel better?”

 

“I am just stating the fact, sir. It is just what it is. You are lucky enough to be someone that has everything, and yes, there are gonna be people who tries to take advantage of it or people who wants to misuse it, or people who expect a lot from you, and I don’t think you can work around it. You are just gonna have to work through it.”

 

“Oh, so, stop complaining is what you are saying.” Seongwoo scoffs.

 

“No, I am not saying that.” Minhyun replies calmly. “I think you have every right to complain or get angry about someone who abuses your trust like that. What I want to say is you have to trust in yourself more so that your first response to people is not about you being the First Son. Believe that there are people who’d like and appreciate you or you work.”

 

“It is easier said than done when being the First Son is the only thing people know me for.” Seongwoo looks out of the window.

 

“Yes, and I am sorry it’d be difficult to change that for all 50 millions people in the country, but maybe you can do it for the people that matter, and the people who cares enough to try and get to know you?”

 

Seongwoo does not ask him if Minhyun is one of those people.

 

“You know why I insist on my name not being on my poems.” Seongwoo asks instead. “Because more than the positive attention that I don’t think I’d deserve, I am afraid of the negative attention.”

 

“Oh.”

 

“People are going to get ready to tear it down with an enthusiasm that is probably unwarranted for a rookie writer. You know how I almost got into the fight at the club the last time? People got in fights at clubs, like all the damn time, but if I get a punch thrown in or thrown at me, that’s gonna be gossips for days and affecting ratings and consequences, and it just … sucks.”

 

“I am sorry.”

 

“It’s fine.” Seongwoo shakes his head. “I know I am like the embodiment of first world problems right now like _oh look at this prince complaining about his tower being too high,_ but …”

 

“I don’t.” Minhyun cuts him off. “I don’t think about you like that. I think your fears are very real.”

 

“I’d have pegged you as one of those fearless warriors just fighting for truth and justice.” Seongwoo says flippantly and Minhyun laughs.

 

“There’s been countless times when I was just scared out of my wits, for my life or for my family or someone I care about.”

 

Right. Seongwoo is talking to a veteran soldier and a NIS agent here.

 

“What did you do then? When you are afraid of something so badly that you feel like you can’t even move?”

 

“You will just have to push through it. There is no other option.” MInhyun answers.

 

“Ergh. Your only option sucks.” Seongwoo groans and lets out a heavy sigh.

 

“I know.” Minhyun scrunches his nose at him, which is cute but unfair because Seongwoo is trying to be pissed off at the world right now. “But life is hardly fair.”

 

“I want to punch something.” Seongwoo says with conviction.

 

“Well, I can do something fun for our gym session tomorrow.” Minhyun smiles. “It’s not the healthiest but sometimes most relieving outlet to just punch something until you are numb.”

 

“I’ll take your words for it.” Seongwoo says. “Where are we?”

 

“Quite close to the airport actually.”

 

“Damn, we really did drive a long way.” Seongwoo murmurs.

 

“Do you want me to turn back?” Minhyun asks. “You do have an 9 am class tomorrow.”

 

“Might as well.” Seongwoo sighs. “I wish you are a bodyguard slash hit man so I can sic you on Hyun Woo.”

 

“I am afraid you are thinking more of a guard dog.” Minhyun deadpans.

 

“Good idea.” Seongwoo muses. “Maybe I’ll raise a dog and trains it to exclusively bite Hyun Woo.”

 

“I … that was not a suggestion, sir.”

 

* * *

 

Seongwoo showers for longer that it is necessary and sits down on his bed, staring at the printed contract and the little leather bound notebook full of his effort and dreams over the past few years. He knows that this is not the end of the world but it is still a pretty fucking big bump and he thinks he is allowed a little sulking and pouting over the next few days.

 

He grabs at the book and flips through it. There are more scratched out lines than actual lines and Seongwoo knows it’s better to do the editing and re-editing on a computer but he is attached to this book because he wrote down his very first shitty and rhymeless poem on this very book when he was in eighth grade and thought cutting lyrics here and there from Nell songs would make a great poem.

 

He was planning on getting all of his finished poems typed out so that he can send them over to the publishers, but he guesses it is kind of pointless now. Nobody is going to be reading his poems anyway in any near future.

 

Or maybe not.

 

Minhyun answers the door in a thin cotton shirt and sweatpants and Seongwoo internally curses at himself for not checking the time before knocking on Minhyun’s door.

 

“Something happens?” Minhyun looks very adorably sleepy and confused for a whole of 0.50 seconds before he is snapped back into the poised trained agent. “Let me get my gun.”

 

“No, no,” Seongwoo grabs at the end of his shirt because the only other option is Minhyun’s biceps and while he definitely wants to, he probably should not. “Everything’s fine. Just … here.”

 

Minhyun blinks down at the notebook Seongwoo is shoving towards him.

 

“Isn’t this..” he asks slowly. “... your poem book?”

 

“Yes, and my very first collection with an audience of zero, so I am making it to one right now.”

 

“You want me to read it?” Minhyun blinks.

 

“If you want to,” Seongwoo says and feels a little stupid. God, what was he even thinking. “Nevermind, it’s a bad idea.”

 

“I will,” Minhyun grabs at the book and says. “I will read it. I am a slow reader so it might take me some times to go through but, I .., thank you for trusting me with this.”

 

“Well,” Seongwoo says and shuffles his feet awkwardly. “I thought if anyone is to be objective of my work even after knowing me, it’d be you.”

 

“Oh,” Minhyun replies. “I think you might not be quite right, but I will try.”

 

“Wait, is that a good thing or a bad thing?” Seongwoo blinks and Minhyun smiles at him before closing the door.

 

“Good night, sir.”


	6. Chapter 6

“Let’s go on a trip.” Woojin says. He has been hanging out at Seongwoo’s while Jihoon is at the library because apparently, they need to be apart for each of them to actually focus and work. 

 

Seongwoo does not think it works anyway because all Woojin has done in the past thirty minutes he’s been here under the guise of studying is just munching on Seongwoo’s snacks and playing on his phone and talking to Seongwoo about the new choreography he is making. Seongwoo is guilty of indulging him on the last point but it has been quite a while since he has danced or choreographed. He misses it.

 

“Don’t you have four midterms coming up in the next week?” Seongwoo reminds him, and Woojin makes the most pathetic noise possible, running his hand through the stack of loose and chicken scratched papers he had brought with him.

 

“I am talking after midterms but, you guys might as well attend my funeral then.”

 

Seongwoo smirks without mercy. The best thing about doing a master in Theatre? No written examinations - not that his recitals and papers are not stressful, but Seongwoo truly does not function well within the confined set of an exam.

 

“Jihoon’s grandma has this kind of bungalow slash country house in Masan.” Woojin continues. “He said it’s really beautiful and nice to visit in summer.”

 

“Knowing Jihoon, he probably means it is surrounded by trees and also possibly haunted.” Seongwoo scoffs.

 

“C’mon hyung. Let’s just do a weekend get-away.” Woojin whines. “Jihoon and your musical is in a month so after next week, you guys are going to start practicing, and then we won’t get to hang out as much, and then you’d be getting your degree soon and moving out.”

 

Well, never let it be said that Park Woojin does not know how to guilt trip.

 

“Let me talk to my mom first.” Seongwoo replies. He hates the fact that he sounds like a middle schooler, but it is just what it is. He does not necessarily think his mom is going to say no, but it is better to let his mom or Sungwoon know first before he goes out from Seoul, especially in this increased security situation. 

 

Speaking of security, he hears the front door opened over Woojin’s excited yapping as Minhyun comes in carrying a paper bag. He went out earlier to get some lunch since Seongwoo is staying in on this very beautiful but scotching Saturday so that he can finish his paper even before Woojin decided to come and freeload. 

 

“What about you?” Seongwoo asks as he takes out two sets of burgers from the bag. “Where is your lunch?”

 

“I have eaten, sir.” Minhyun answers simply. 

 

“Why do you never eat with me?” Seongwoo off-handedly comments but he realises that it is actually true. Apart from the first day when Seongwoo sat down with Minhyun for breakfast and lunch, Minhyun has never been with him for any meal. 

 

Minhyun just shrugs. “I usually eat very quickly. I can be a little more distracted when I am eating.”

 

“That’s sad.” Woojin comments. Of course, for him, eating is probably world’s best treasured activity. “But isn’t it boring to just stand there and watch Seongwoo hyung eat?”

 

“You’d think,” Minhyun smiles, and oh, Seongwoo does not like this smile. “But he ate an expired tuna can the other day, and only realised it half way through.”

 

Ok, not his proudest moment, but these things happen, ok? He is just human, a very clumsy and distracted human, but still. 

 

“I bet half of the time you are protecting him from himself.” Woojin grins, and Minhyun does not reply probably out of courtesy but Seongwoo can see the  _ smile _ on the bastard’s face.

 

“Gentle reminder that one of you is on my payroll, and another is eating the burger I bought with my money.”

 

“I am not on your payroll, sir.” Minhyun simply says.

 

“Yeah, I have no defense.” Woojin says and bites at his burger until half of it disappears into his mouth. 

 

“I’ll be outside the door if you need me.” Minhyun says, and turns to leave, but Seongwoo stops him.

 

“Dude, just stay inside. It’s just Woojin, plus, it’s hot as hell out there.”

 

“I’d be fine.” Minhyun says. “I don’t want to intrude.”

 

“There’s nothing to intrude, hyung.” Woojin says. “Can I call you hyung? I am calling you hyung. We are just shooting the shit. Stay.”

 

“You are supposed to be studying.” Seongwoo reminds him but Woojin pulls a Blergh face, and whatever. Seongwoo gives up. It is not like he has any real power on his juniors anyway.

 

“We are talking about doing a weekend overnight trip.” Woojin says with a mouthful of fries.

 

“I see.” Minhyun nods. “Have you talked to the President or the Chief of Staff?”

 

“He literally brought it up ten minutes ago.” Seongwoo replies. “I’ll talk to my mom.”

 

“Where are you planning on going?”

 

“Masan, apparently.”

 

“Let me know the place when you are sure.” Minhyun nods. “I’ll get someone to go and check ahead first.”

 

“Cool,” Woojin exclaims. “A presidential check out.”

 

“Can you check if it is haunted too?” Seongwoo asks. “Just to be sure?”

 

“Not our area of expertise, sir.”

 

* * *

 

Seongwoo can count the number of the times he has seen his mother cook a complete meal on one hand. It is not a particularly great loss because mom is average when it comes to cooking. (It is so like her though that even in the areas that she does not excel at, she is not bad at them. She is just average). His aunt used to stay with them before his mom took office and she was a far better cook than mom so he is more used to his aunt’s cooking.

 

So, he is a little surprised when mom said she wants to cook for their weekly dinner. 

 

“I’ve been wanting to try out this kitchen!” Mom exclaims as she chops up a few tofus unevenly. 

 

“Mom, you’ve been here for nine months.” Seongwoo laughs. He is supposed to be helping, but he can barely peel a garlic so mom asks him to just stand there. Her literal words.  _ “Just stand there.” _

 

“Well, being president is busier that I have imagined.” Mom raised an eyebrow. She looks like Seongwoo a lot - she always says she inherited all of her father’s manly features, which do not look particularly great on her, but looks amazing on her son. Seongwoo likes her face though - it is a reliable face, the one that you want to look up in times of difficulty. 

 

Or he is probably being biased because it is his mother.

 

“Sweetie, can you pass me the soy sauce?” Mom says, pointing at the terrifyingly multiple assorts of condiment bottles on the first shelf of a 5-level cupboard. How does the staff even get the things from the topmost shelf? “And don’t hurt yourself.”

 

“Ha ha.” Seongwoo laughs dryly but picks up the bottle that is labeled as the soy sauce and passes it to her. “What’s up though? Why the sudden cooking?”

 

“I have a gap in my schedule this evening.” His mom says and opens the pot she has boiling on the stove. “Wanted to do something less stressful for a change. I’m sorry your weekly meal here is not going to taste as good though.”

 

“Still better than the ramen I would have cooked by myself.” Seongwoo shrugs. 

 

It takes her a good hour and a half to finish cooking, so they finally get to eat only after 9 in the evening. And she has made enough to feed probably the entire staff.

 

“Maybe I should give some of this to Sungwoon tomorrow.” Mom frowns, looking down into the steaming pot in her hand. 

 

“He eats?” Seongwoo scoffs. “I’d assume he’d just absorb the fear of the people around him to sustain him or something.”

 

Mom gives him an unappreciative look. “He’s a nice boy.”

 

“To you.” Seongwoo pouts.

 

Sungwoon has been with them since he was 19 and Seongwoo was still in high school. He started off as an intern for Seongwoo’s mom, who was still working in Public Procurement Service back then. And he impressed enough people around him that he was hired right off the college, but Seongwoo’s mom somehow snatched him out all of the potential bosses, and Sungwoon has been with them since then, through his mom’s campaigns and failures, and successes as well, of course. 

 

“How is your schoolwork?” Mom asks as she finally sits down after fretting about side dishes and cutleries.

 

“School is school.” Seongwoo shrugs. “It’s fine. Surprisingly not as stressful as my undergrad degree.”

 

“You know how surprised I was when you said you want to go back to school.” Seongwoo would take offense at his mom’s words, but it is true - he was very dramatic and vocal about how much he hates school when he was getting his degree in Applied Music. “But I am glad you are having fun.”

 

“Ok, having  _ fun  _ is definitely too much.” Seongwoo replies, and sips on the beef stew. It doesn't taste that bad, actually. “Let’s just say I am passing by.”

 

“And how’s your new bodyguard?”

 

“Minhyun?” Seongwoo mumbles. “He’s good, I think. I mean no one has actually tried to kill me yet so I wouldn’t know… sorry.” He pipes down at the look from his mother. “He’s a good agent, but he won’t stop calling me sir.”

 

“Protocol.” Mom shrugs. “You will get used to it as you get older anyway.”

 

“Ergh.” Seongwoo groans. 

 

“I’m just relieved,” mom says. “That you are not demanding him to stop the way you did with Mr. Jeong back then.”

 

“Ok, Mr. Jeong was much scarier, and more rigid.” Seongwoo continues. “He scared the students  _ even Jihoon _ . Minhyun is fine. He blends in, probably because he’s in our age range.”

 

“Oh, I haven’t seen Jihoon for a while.” Mom exclaims. She likes Jihoon, much to the fear of dismay of Seongwoo. Of course, it is not like she had met with his friends a lot of the times but she did a lot of campus visit for her campaign when she was running for president, and from a few times that Seongwoo went with his squad to support her, she had been taken with Jihoon, who to Seongwoo’s credit, had dialed his boy-next-door charm to the max. 

 

Jihoon would make such a good actor one day. 

 

“How’s he? How is everyone actually? I hope they don’t find your agent too intrusive?”

 

“They are fine. I think Jaehwan likes him better than me.” Seongwoo waves his hand and says. “Mostly because he’s always lending Jaehwan spare coins to do his laundry.” That reminds him. Seongwoo probably should check with Sungwoon if Minhyun had claimed any of the throw away money he had spent for Seongwoo.

 

“That’s good.” Mom nods. “One of the reasons I let you stay out of Blue House is so that you don’t stay too far from your friends. You were always such a social kid.”

 

It is one of Seongwoo’s reasons too. First Son’s friends or not - every visitor requires a lengthy process to sign in into Blue House, and considering the distance between the House and their campus as well, Seongwoo might as well be just cut off from his friends.

 

“Thanks, mom.” Seongwoo mumbles. He knows that a lot of people surprisingly wants him to reside in the Blue House, from security department to the PR department, but mom lets him do whatever he wants, as always, and he sometimes has to consciously remind himself to not take any of it for granted.

 

“Speaking of social,” Seongwoo says. “Can I go for a short overnight trip next weekend? We are visiting Jihoon’s grandma place in Masan.”

 

Mom’s face does not potrary anything but she seems to be considering. “Don’t you two have a musical coming up? You and Jihoon.”

 

“We do, but it is still a month away, and it will just be for a weekend. Minhyun is coming as well, I mean, of course he is, so we will be safe.”

 

“August 11 and 12?” Mom says, looking through her phone. “That’s the Preliminary Summit for the Reunification Talk.”

 

“Oh,” Seongwoo says, a little disappointed. He guesses Woojin really got to him with the idea of a trip. He hasn’t gone out of Seoul in so long. “Am I supposed to be present?”

 

“No, no.” Mom shakes her head. “You don’t have the security clearance.”

 

Seongwoo scoffs. “Thanks.”

 

“If you can make it on Friday night for the casual meet and greet dinner with the ambassadors, I don’t see why not.” Mom says.

 

“Really?” 

 

“Yeah. Sungwoon was actually talking about getting you to stay in the House because some journalists might try and corner you about the summit, so it might not be that bad of an idea to be away for a while.”

 

“Yes!” Seongwoo fist bumps. 

 

“But,” his mom interrupts. “I want Mr. Hwang to be with you every step of the way. Also ask him to work out a tighter reporting frame for the trip with Sungwoon later. We are just having a preliminary summit, but you can never be too careful.”

 

“Have there been any more threat?” Seongwoo inquires. He does not the exact details of these threats that his mom has been receiving, because again, he does not have enough security clearance to even know who is threatening his mom’s life - government is funny like that sometimes.

 

“Nothing to worry about.” Mom waves a hand, but Seongwoo highly doubts it. Even when he came in earlier this evening, he noticed that there is double the security at the Residence. 

 

“Not to use your own words against you, but you can never be too careful.” Seongwoo says and mom laughs, looking amused. “And if you say one more joke about the irony of me telling someone to be careful, mom, I swear .. “

 

“I didn’t say anything!” Mom laughs. 


	7. Chapter 7

Minhyun picks him up at the Residence. He gets an evening off whenever Seongwoo visits the Blue House for dinner, but today is the only day he actually took off. Mostly, Minhyun just hangs around the Residence with the agents he know, trading intel or practicing karate chops or whatever NIS agents do with their time. But he notifies Seongwoo earlier that he’d be going out, and picking up Seongwoo after his dinner, and he reaches not a minute late, in a casual shirt and ripped jeans, because he likes making Seongwoo suffer.

 

“Is that your supper?” Minhyun points at the huge container in Seongwoo’s hand and asks.

 

“No, maybe tomorrow lunch or dinner.” Seongwoo looks down at it and says. “Actually, I can eat just this stew for like next 3 days and not ran out of it. Mom made way too much.”

 

“The President cooks?” Minhyun asks, a little surprise tinting his tone as they got into Seongwoo’s car.

 

“Not often,” Seongwoo shrugs. “Have you eaten?”

 

“I haven’t actually.” Minhyun casually answers. “I’ll grab something quick when we reach.”

 

“Dude, it’s like 11.” Seongwoo exclaims.

 

“I’ve just lost track of time.” Minhyun shrugs and starts the car. Seongwoo wonders where he had been. Probably with his girlfriend (or boyfriend, Seongwoo doesn’t want to think that because he doesn’t want to hope) - it is hard to imagine someone like Minhyun to be single. And then, Seongwoo starts feeling a little bad because it must be hard for Minhyun’s girlfriend given that he is with Seongwoo for all his waking hours and barely get 6 hours off a week.

 

“Did you do something fun?” Seongwoo asks.

 

“Yeah. Went to a movie.”

 

Right. Definitely a date then.

 

“You could have gotten something to eat before coming back to fetch me.” Seongwoo says. “It’s not like I can’t wait half an hour more.”

 

“No problem, sir. I was not very hungry.”

 

“Still,” Seongwoo mumbles. “Your friend or friends might want to hang out more, you know, since you are always working.”

 

“I went alone.” Minhyun shrugs. “It’s a Tuesday night so not a lot of my friends want to go out.”

 

Oh. Seongwoo does not know which is sadder - the fact that Minhyun might have gone on an imaginary date with an imaginary girlfriend, or Minhyun watching a movie alone on a Tuesday night. Seongwoo decides on the latter.

 

“I am sorry. It must be hard doing social things when you are working here.” Seongwoo says.

 

“Why are you sorry?”

 

“Because..” Seongwoo starts. “You are working for me, and I’m not sure if you notice, but I am the kind of person who needs to be surrounded by friends most of the times. I can’t imagine working 7 days a week without any time to meet up with my friends or family.”

 

“It is fine, sir.” Minhyun smiles gently. “They understand. My line of job requires my full attention when I am on an assignment.”

 

“But still,” Seongwoo mumbles.

 

“I am fine.” Minhyun repeats. “Think of it as you having a deadline and having to focus on it for all your waking hours.”

 

“Except yours last for like 6 months, not 2 days.”

 

“Yeah well,” Minhyun shrugs. “Comes with the job.”

 

“Come eat supper.” Seongwoo blurts out. “Dinner whatever. I don’t know when’s the last time you’ve eaten.”

 

“No, it is not necess…”

 

“Dude, it is fine. My mom gives me enough food to last like three days, and I am gonna get bored it by like Thursday, so you would be helping me to not waste this, really.” Seongwoo insists. “Plus, it is made by the President. Don’t tell me you don’t at least want to be able to taste the President’s cooking.”

 

“Well, can’t say I am not intrigued.” Minhyun laughs. “But I don’t want to impose.”

 

“Do you want me to call my mom and ask for her Presidential permission to eat her food?”

 

“No. Don’t do that.” Minhyun hurriedly says. “Fine. Alright. Thank you for the food. I’m sure I’ll love it.”

 

“Tone down your expectations, pal.” Seongwoo scoffs. “She really isn’t that good of a cook.”

 

* * *

 

“It is not the best thing you’ve ever eaten, I know.” Seongwoo says as Minhyun takes a bite out of the freshly microwaved beef stew and instant rice.

 

“It tastes nice.” Minhyun answers. It feels a little strange to be seeing Minhyun here, actually sitting down and eating at Seongwoo’s dining table, looking every bit like he belongs. “Reminds me of my sister’s cooking actually. She likes to put a lot of scallion as well.”

 

“You have a sister?” Seongwoo asks. He feels like everytime he speaks to Minhyun, he learns a new fact about the guy, which does not feel as exciting as it sounds because it just means Seongwoo does not know him at all despite him being with Seongwoo for nearly two months.

 

“Yes, an elder one.” Minhyun nods. “She’s a teacher.”

 

Well, somebody is in the sharing mood today. That’s nice.

 

“That’s … quite normal.”

 

“I am a normal person.” Minhyun laughs.

 

“Who can probably snap my neck in two seconds.”

 

“That is not possible, sir. I mean, I can probably snap your neck, but not in two seconds.”

 

“Yes, thank you. Feeling very assured now.” Seongwoo scoffs. “You know, it is actually really boring to watch you eat. I don’t know how you do it.”

 

“I get paid to do it.”

 

“Fair enough,” Seongwoo shrugs. “I am gonna go get some beer. I’d ask but I assume you won’t drink?”

 

“No.” Minhyun shakes his head. “Water is fine for me. Thanks.”

 

Seongwoo gives him an ok sign and grabs the water bottle from the fridge along with his beer.

 

Despite saying that he is not hungry, Minhyun is already three quarters through the bowl of stew that Sengwoo has gotten him, and his rice is almost gone.

 

“Do you want another one?” Seongwoo asks.

 

“No, this is just right for my daily carbohydrate intake.” Minhyun says and Seongwoo groans.

 

“I am kidding,” Minhyun laughs. “I am just almost full and I don’t sleep that well on a very filled stomach, that’s all.”

 

“You’ve got jokes, huh?” Seongwoo scoffs and takes a sip out of his beer. “Funny.”

 

Minhyun just smiles.

 

“I finished reading your poems, by the way.” Minhyun says after a stretch of silence, and Seongwoo tenses a little.

 

“Is it a good thing or a bad thing that it took you two weeks to finish it?” Seongwoo says with a small laugh. He’s not sure what he was thinking when he gave his poems to Minhyun, but what is done is done, and he does not particularly regret it. What he does feel is a little vulnerable, because that book contains some of his works that he is not even sure he wants to publish due to them being too personal or just straight up trash.

 

“I told you I am a slow reader, sir.” Minhyun continues. “It really is not a reflection of your work, and you know I do not have a lot of chances to read.”

 

“Right.” Seongwoo nods. “So, the verdict? Am I gonna be the next Emily Dickinson?”

 

“I don’t think you have enough rhyme in your work for that, sir.” Minhyun says lightly and oh god, is Minhyun going to talk _poetry_ to Seongwoo? Please, God, he is too weak for this. “Your work actually remind me of Murakami and Richard Siken, which is strange because their proses are very different.”

 

Seongwoo is right. He definitely is not strong enough for this.

 

“Murakami is not a poet.” He blankly says instead.

 

“Yes, but he is who I am reminded of when I read your words.” Minhyun easily replies. “There is kind of an absurd but humorous undertones to your poems but there is also something very dark just .. lingering around each line. I guess that’s where the Richard Siken reminder comes in. You … do not like that comparison?”

 

Minhyun must have seen that little stricken look on Seongwoo’s face.

 

“No, no.” Seongwoo says vigorously. “Dude, are you kidding me? Any literature student would kill to get themselves compared with Murakami or Richard Siken. And I am not even a literature student. I take electives.”

 

“Well, if you want to get another Master, I don’t think Literature would be a bad choice for you.” Minhyun says, and who is this guy even?

 

Of course, Seongwoo knows Minhyun reads and he is pretty sure he had seen Minhyun read Murakami before, but most of Minhyun’s books are in Japanese and he does not recognize them unless it is something really famous.

 

“I am just surprised that you talk Literature.”

 

Minhyun gives him a smile that Seongwoo would go out on a limb, and call _bashful._

 

“I mean,” Seongwoo scrambles his words so it does not sound like he was underestimating Minhyun’s intelligence or knowledge. “I know you read a lot, but you know, it was almost like a dissection, the way you phrased your words.”

 

“I wanted to be a writer.” Minhyun says, and what. “When I was younger. Of course, it was not a dream that is set in stone, but I thought it’d be nice to be a writer.”

 

“But you did not study Literature?” Seongwoo asks.

 

“No.” Minhyun shakes his head. “I actually have good scores in both Science and Arts, and my dad wants me to take the science track. I did take in and still have good results because I don’t want to disappoint them, but turns out I don’t like the STEM field that much to spend my entire life working in it. But by then, it is too late for me to switch track, and I was not also very sure that I would be a good writer after all.”

 

“And then, you joined the army?”

 

“And then I joined the army.” Minhyun nods. “And I actually like it. It’s funny because I have to use my scientific knowledge more in this line of job, you know. Norwegian Wood does not help you when you have to defuse a bomb. Electrical engineering does.”

 

“Do you .. regret it?” Seongwoo asks. “Not being a writer. Not studying what you wanted to study.”

 

“I don’t think I’d have been a good writer.”

 

“But you didn’t even try!”

 

Minhyun sighs. “You’re right. I didn’t, but I  don’t have any regret choosing this path. Being an agent is .. dangerous and a lot of red-tape and restrictions  but there is also this sense of satisfaction and accomplishment after every mission, every assignment, like I did something that matter, you know. It’s a nice feeling, and I haven’t ever looked back.”

 

Seongwoo wonders what kind of satisfaction and accomplishment Minhyun can get from babysitting Seongwoo day in and day out.

 

“Did you hate it when you first get assigned to me?” He blurts out and Minhyun looks up at him, surprised.

 

“Sir.”

 

“I mean, you would have, right? I don’t know what your previous assignments were, but given that they are all redacted, I assume they are probably some James-Bond 007 things, and yet, three years later and you are here walking me home from campus and campus from home.”

 

“It is not like that.”

 

Of course, it’d be like that. Seongwoo remembers back to their first encounter where Minhyun feels like this uptight grouchy agent, but it makes sense that Minhyun would feel at least a little bitter that his skills and experience is being wasted on a job like this - Sungwoon probably tried to get the best agent from NIS to do the most boring job possible.

 

“I mean, it’s ok if you feel like that.” Seongwoo reassures him. Yes, he does feel horrible for Minhyun, but at the end of the day, it is not something none of them has any control over. “I’d also be terribly bored if, say, I am hired to act as a walk-by in an infomercial, which is something that did happen by the way. You can probably still find the clips on youtube.”

 

“I am not bored,” Minhyun says. “And I do not hate this job, sir.”

 

Probably not because Minhyun is a professional, but Seongwoo does not want to keep talking about it - he already regrets bringing it up - because it is just going to make him feel even worse.

 

“I hope it’s because you get to at least stare at my beautiful face day in and day out.”

 

Minhyun blinks at him because shaking his head in amusement. “That must be it, sir.”

 

“C’mon. You can tell me. Am I the most handsome person you’ve ever had to work for?” Seongwoo grins.

 

“Well, the Transportation Minister comes pretty close.” Minhyun winks. Liar. The Transportation Minister is like 60 and looks like a Dodo bird.

 

“I will take this great compliment to heart.” Seongwoo says seriously, finishing his beer. “But don’t worry. It is only for 6 months. Afterwards, you can go back to, I don’t know what your regular job is like, so I am just going to assume something like COD.”

 

“Sir,” Minhyun sighs. “You always say I am a terrible liar.”

 

“That’s because you are.”

 

“So,” Minhyun says, turning his face so that he is fully facing Seongwoo. “Tell me. Do I look like I am lying when I say I do not hate this job and I do not hate being around you?”

 

He does not.

 

Seongwoo is starting to think that that might be a problem.


	8. Chapter 8

“Jihoon, I am going to marry you just for this house!” Woojin exclaims as soon as he exits the car and steps onto the slightly muddy ground full of dried leaves.

 

Jihoon sighs dramatically. “I always knew he only liked me for my money.”

 

“It’s a nice house.” Seongwoo comments as he watches Woojin runs with his arms flailing towards the two-storey Colonial era style house that stands to face them. It looks elegant and peaceful - also a little haunted but Seongwoo is not going to say that out loud.

 

Jaehwan whistles next to him before following Jihoon and Woojin into the house, and Seongwoo whips his head around to see Minhyun climbing out of the car with both of his and Seongwoo’s bags.

 

“Here,” Seongwoo extends a hand and takes his bag. “Hope the car ride wasn’t too traumatizing for you.”

 

Being in close contact with the two demonic boyfriends and Jaehwan with his guitar is never a wonderful time for anyone involved, and Seongwoo pities Minhyun for having not only to endure that human tornadoes that are his friends, but also for having to drive all the way from Seoul to Masan for them.

 

“It was fine.” Minhyun shakes his head, and says. “Although I have to say I am gonna have so many new ideas for torture at our annual NIS brainstorm sessions.”

 

“You know when you say shits like that with a straight face, I can’t tell if you are joking or not, right?” Seongwoo mutters flatly, but Minhyun just laughs at him and opens the front door for him.

 

The place is not the most modernised, there isn’t even a router and the television in the living room is a 12-inch TV that Seongwoo hasn’t seen since his elementary school age.

 

“Yeah, grandma is looking to redo this place.” Jihoon comments as Woojin and Jaehwan fusses over the VCR player. “There are two bedrooms - me and Woojin are gonna take the better one, obviously.”

 

Woojin high fives him.

 

“And all the hyungs can take the one next to the kitchen, but it might be a little tight for three people.”

 

“I am good with staying here.” Minhyun pats at the couch that he is putting his bag on.

 

“Are you sure?” Seongwoo asks, and glares at Jihoon. “Can you two not cuddle for one night and share the bigger bedroom with us?”

 

“I said better, not bigger.” Jihoon shrugs. “The beds are the same size. Someone got to squeeze in with two other people, and hey hyung, if you want to be sandwiched between me and Woojin, all you gotta do is ask.”

 

“This is fine.” Minhyun says in  a tone that Seongwoo has come to learn as _final._ “It’s only for one night.”

 

“That’s settled then.” Jihoon clasped his hands and says. Seongwoo bets if it is Woojin who has to sleep on a couch that is ¾ the length of his body, Jihoon would be raising riots.

 

But then, Minhyun to Seongwoo is not the same as Woojin to Jihoon is. So, Seongwoo just nods and brings his bag into his assigned bedroom. The room is beautiful, despite being a little small. It faces the stream out back and the breeze that graces Seongwoo when he opens the window is fresh and cool unlike the polluted wind of Seoul. Seongwoo notices that there is not really a fence or gate around the property and wonders how much land Jihoon’s family owns around here.

 

“Hyung,” Jaehwan says as he comes in and throws his bag onto the bed. “Jihoon says the toilet is an outhouse.”

 

“What the hell.”

 

“Yeah,” Jaehwan wrinkles his nose. “This really is an authentic ancient house. It’s out the back door, to the right.”

 

“We’ll just get close to nature like that I guess.” Seongwoo laughs and takes out his sunscreen so he does not burn to death when he goes swimming later. They had made plan to swim in the stream that is flowing in parallel to the land the minute they had spotted it from the car.

 

Apart from the ancient squatting wooden outhouse and kind of creepy 80s decoration, the place is beautiful; quiet apart from the birds and cicadas and the flow of the water, and also cooler than Seoul or even Masan city area because of the immense trees around them.

 

Woojin is busy taking about two hundred photos of Jihoon doing various poses around the stream in his speedo, so Seongwoo follows Jaehwan first into the water, shivering a little when his bare legs dip into the cool water.

 

“Are you sure you don’t want to come in?” He yells to Minhyun who actually looks more relaxed than Seongwoo has ever seen him. He is lounging on the bank in his sports attire, a book in hand. He is not wearing his suit, but Seongwoo does not understand why he is in his workout clothes if all he is doing is sitting and reading.

 

“I am good.” Minhyun replies back. “Enjoy.”

 

“Are you any good at swimming?” Seongwoo asks. “Because I am about to teach this one.” He grips at Jaehwan’s bare shoulder. “So, if the both of us go under, it’s up to you.”

 

“I’ll try my best, sir.” Minhyun laughs.

 

“Are you not weirded out that he keeps calling you sir?” Jaehwan asks as Seongwoo pulls him into the stream where the water reaches their chest level.

 

“I am, but he won’t call me anything else.” Seongwoo scoffs. “Actually, he did offer to call me Mr. Ong and that’s even worse.”

 

“Kinky.” Jaehwan guffaws. “I bet you like whatever he calls you though.”

 

“Shut up.”

 

Jaehwan, unsurprisingly, does not. “Dude, have you seen him? From one hot-blooded gay man to another…”

 

“You are bi.” Seongwoo reminds him.

 

“From one hot-blooded half gay man to another,” Jaehwan sticks his tongue out. “It gets all like tingly inside when he calls you sir, doesn’t it?”

 

“Oh my god!” Seongwoo grunts.

 

“Maybe you can ask him to call you master..”

 

Seongwoo dunks him.

 

* * *

 

“Are you sure you don't want to jump in?” Seongwoo asks as he wraps the towel he brings around his soaked body. He does not realize the river bank is actually more than a little inclined. Fuck. He is already out of breath from having to teach Jaehwan how to swim, which spectacularly failed, by the way, so Jaehwan is now just sitting on one of the shallower parts, throwing a beach ball around with Jihoon.

 

“Are you alright?” Minhyun raises an eyebrow, probably surprised by the fact that Seongwoo is out of breath after a 30 minute swimming. “Do you need water? Maybe some oxygen tank?”

 

“Ha ha.” Seongwoo says dryly and sits down next to Minhyun on the ground. “I’ll let you know that my stamina has actually gone up.”

 

“I know.” Minhyun laughs. “I am the one doing cardio with you every week at the gym, remember?”

 

Right. Of course, Seongwoo’s eternal humiliation at their weekly gym session when he just pants and gasps for air like a fish on land everytime Minhyun raises the speed on the treadmill.

 

“What are you reading?”

 

Minhyun turns the book cover towards him, and Seongwoo blinks at the familiar characters.

 

“You read Chinese too?”

 

“Not very well. I am relearning.” Minhyun shows the pen in his hand. It seems like he has been underlining the words he do not understand. Minhyun is such a Minhyun. Seongwoo sometimes does not understand how he lives like this.

 

“How many languages do you actually speak?” Seongwoo asks. “I know you read Japanese and English. And now Chinese.”

 

“Mainly those.” Minhyun answers. “A tiny bit of Spanish. Enough to converse, I guess.”

 

Seongwoo bets Minhyun is double hot when he is speaking Spanish, the smooth words rolling down his slick tongue.

 

He roughly runs the towel through his head to stop thinking about Minhyun’s mouth and tongue, and asks. “What’s the book about?”

 

“The biography of Chairman Mao.”

 

Of course.

 

“Stop looking like that.” Minhyun laughs.

 

“Like what?”

 

“Like you think I am the most ridiculous person in the world.”

 

“You are the most ridiculous person in the world.” Seongwoo laughs. “Who even read about Communism as a leisurely read?”

 

“It’s not about Communism. It’s about Chairman Mao.” Minhyun shakes his head. “And I am not doing it for leisure. I wanted to brush up on my Chinese. This is what I brought to read for pleasure.”

 

“William C. Williams, hah?” Seongwoo exclaims, looking at the thin book that Minhyun is showing him titled _‘William Carlos Williams : Selected Collection’._ “I would not have taken you for an imagist guy.”

 

“I am not.” Minhyun shrugs. “I mean I don’t have anything for or against Imagism, actually, not against any poetry movement mostly because I don't know them all. I tend to like anything that speak to me, I guess.”

 

“So, what’s your favorite?” Seongwoo takes the book into his hand and flips through. “Don’t tell me _This is Just to Say_ ”

 

“What’s wrong with _This is Just to Say_?”

 

“It’s just a cliche.”

 

“So what? Cliches can be beautiful.” Minhyun shrugs. “It is simple. The poem. I did not understand why it is even a poem in the first place, but over time, it just stays with you. The simplicity in it is attractive. I think I like it the most. How sometimes the most mundane things in our life can be the most beautiful.”

 

“Wow,” Seongwoo says softly. “And I thought I was supposed to be the poetic one in this relationship.”

 

Wait. Shit. Backtrack.

 

Minhyun just stares at him for a while before looking away. “You can still be. Don’t worry.”

 

Oh.

 

They sit in the comfortable silence for a while, Minhyun going back to his Chinese book, and Seongwoo flipping through the poems, pausing once in a while to read the ones he hasn’t thought about in a while, until Jihoon calls at them, saying he is hungry and to go back.

 

The sun is starting to set anyway so Seongwoo nods and picks himself up, taking the hand Minhyun is offering for support. Minhyun’s hand is warm, unlike Seongwoo, who normally runs a lower temperature and who has just swam. Minhyun squeezes his hand for a brief ghostly moment, and then he is a perfectly respectable distance away, waiting for Seongwoo to walk ahead so he can follow.

 


	9. Chapter 9

Woojin cooks for them, making simple fried rice and stir-fries. Jihoon also brings out the electric grill they had brought to grill meat.

He also brings out the worryingly large number of soju bottles.

“Dude, what the hell.” Seongwoo exclaims. “How are we going to finish 10 bottles between us?”

“There’s five of us.” Jihoon shrugs. “2 for one person for two days. Sounds reasonable enough to me.”

“Oh, I am not drinking.” Minhyun interjects from where he is helping Woojin chops the carrots.

“Cool. Two more for us to share then.” Jihoon grins and Seongwoo rolls his eyes.

“You can drink, you know.” Seongwoo tells Minhyun. “This can be your vacation as well.”

“I don’t drink.” Minhyun smiles. “Not just on the job.”

“Wait. Really?” Jihoon turns to him and asks like Minhyun not drinking is the most offensive thing he can be.

“I am very bad with alcohol.” Minhyun answers and neatly piles the little carrot sticks he had chopped up. “Even a beer is enough to knock me out.”

“Well, good to know you are not good at everything.” Seongwoo laughs and pops a piece of meat from the grill into his mouth even though Jihoon attempts to slap at his hand. 

“You’d be surprised at the things I am not good at, sir.” Minhyun smiles and passes over the carrots to Woojin, who carelessly tosses them into the pan he is moving over the gas stove.

 

* * *

 

 

Jaehwan brings cards so they play Poker for the night since the TV only has two channels and the internet is spotty as best out here, until everyone gets buzzed enough to start yelling over ambiguous cheating and changing hands. They decided to switch to just simple drinking games after that.

 

And as usual, Seongwoo loses spectacularly in most of them because a lot of them involves addition and multiplications, and seriously, which genius invented drinking games that involves math?

 

He is barely conscious by the time he loses another round in Cham Cham Cham and decides to knock off. He is going in and out of the darkness, but someone is carrying him onto the bed ; he just hopes it is Minhyun and not Jaehwan because one, Jaehwan is even weaker than Seongwoo and he’ll probably break his spine attempting to carry Seongwoo, and two, Minhyun is good. Better than good even. He is the best of the good.

 

Seongwoo also thinks Minhyun smells very (very) nice.

 

“There’s water on the table.” There is a voice next to his ear, and Seongwoo groans. He does not want to make a mess in Jihoon’s home because he is very scared of Jihoon.

 

“Wipeitoff.” He grumbles and tries to get up when there is no responses.

 

“What are you doing?” Someone shoves him back down onto the mattress, and Seongwoo opens his eyes to see Minhyun through a cloud. 

 

“There’s water on the table.” Seongwoo mumbles. “Wipe it off so it doesn’t get wet.”

 

Minhyun giggles, at least Seongwoo thinks he is giggling. It is hard to say when there is buzzing around his ears, except the buzzing is coming from inside his ears and god, he hopes he does not have flies inside his ears. That would suck.

 

“Go to sleep. I’ll check up on you later.”

 

Sleep. Sleep sounds good. Maybe if he sleeps, the world would stop being a giant roller coaster. Seongwoo hates roller coaster.

 

He’d totally go on one if Minhyun comes and holds his hand though.

 

* * *

 

 

Seongwoo wakes up with a dried throat and a spinning head. He blinks his eyes for more than a few times, trying to get used to the darkness. He remembers the light switches are all the way over at the entrance, and there is no light coming in through the open window because the trees are too dense and there is no moon.

Seongwoo groans, reaching around for his phone, but only comes in contact with someone’s head, whose grunt is definitely Kim Jaehwan’s. Seongwoo swallows his spit, the dryness of his throat even gets itchier, and tries to sit up.

There is a water bottle on the nightstand. Right. Water on the table.

Seongwoo scoffs and drowns all of it.

Which, in hindsight, was a bad idea because now everything, probably including his dinner, is threatening to come back up. 

He sends out a silent internal curse, slaps a hand across his mouth and runs out of his room. He passes by a sleeping Minhyun on the couch, but does not have the time to stop because his stomach is fighting to escape from his chest cavity.

He is never going to fall for Jihoon’s tricks, and drink over his limit again. Ever. And he knows that he said this every time he got drunk, but this time, it is for real.

He wipes his disgusting mouth after he pukes a good amount, and heads towards the outhouse. Might as well pee since he is already out here. At least, he has tomorrow to nurse the hangover before going back to Seoul. He’ll probably just laze around near the stream, and sleep it off. As far as prospective hangover days go, it would not be a bad one.

He hopes he pukes and pees out a good amount of alcohol from his system, but no luck. He is still a little dizzy and not in total control of his limbs yet, so Seongwoo just finishes up his business and heads back towards.

It takes him a good amount of time to realize that something is very wrong. He is not the best at keeping times but he is pretty sure it should not take him this long to get back to the house. And more importantly, when he tries to look around, he does not see the direct path panning from the house to the outhouse, but he is instead standing amidst trees.

Fuck. He is lost.

Ok. Seongwoo does not think he is in that big of a trouble because this place is not actually a dense forest. It is just a slightly larger park wedged between a highway and a nearby district. He definitely won’t be wandering around unfound. 

However, he cannot see any source of light - there isn’t even any star, and he cannot find any path that seems familiar. He can vaguely hear water running though, so he must not be very far away from the stream. It’s ok. It’s gonna be ok. He is just going to follow the sound of the water and then he would be able to spot the house, and make his way back. It is going to be ok.

It takes him five / ten minutes (really, he is bad at keeping time) to consider the possibility that he is fucked.  He can still hear the water but the stream is nowhere to be found, and in fact, he is starting to feel like the sound of water is coming from all directions, which does not make sense. There is no wild animal in the area, Jihoon has guaranteed and Minhyun also confirmed after he did a preliminary check on the house (god, Minhyun is going to  be so mad at him), but every snap of the twigs and every night bird chirp sends his heart into racing. Seongwoo is manly enough to admit that he is  _ apprehensive  _ of the supernatural - not saying he believes in ghosts or somethings, but you never know what kind of  _ things  _ go bumping in the night in this kind of place.

He is sweating and thirsty, and also incredibly tired from both physical and mental exhaustion. At least, he feels like he is no longer drunk, but drunk or not, he is probably not getting out of here on his own.

“HELLO!” He yells into the trees and there is a faint echo coming back. Fuck. “HEY. HELP. IS ANYONE AROUND?”

He feels like this is pretty dumb because if there is, say a serial killer lurking by because with Seongwoo’s shit luck, why the fuck not, he would just be inviting them to an open house of one (1) victim right here. But then, he is out of options apart from just sitting here and waiting until the sun comes up so he has better visibility.

It takes another stretch of uncountable time for the panic to truly sink in. Seongwoo has had a lot of anxiety before, but not to the point of this, the point where the ground gives out under his leg and Seongwoo barely catches himself before he is on the ground.

“I am gonna be ok.” He mutters to calm himself down but it is difficult to hear himself when his heart is attempting to pound out of his ears. He tries to put his head between his knees although he is not sure if this position is for a panic attack or an earthquake. “It’s fine. I’ll find a way back.”

The sun is coming up soon. He does not know what time it is, but it has to come up soon and Seongwoo will make it back and laugh it off. He is going to be …

“HEY!”

Seongwoo thinks he screams or scrambles back because his back touches something hard but his heart is pounding so loudly and his vision is starting to get blurry and he cannot see or hear anything but the droning around him, muting his senses and just pulling him into this darkness … deep inviting abyss.

“Hey. Hey. Seongwoo.” There are hands on his shoulders, he thinks. He thinks he grabs at them, trying to anchor himself. “Breathe with me.  In and out. You are ok. You are safe. Breathe.”

Ok. Breathing sounds difficult, but he can do it. In and out. In. Out. Heart jumps. In.  _ Seongwoo, breathe.  _ Out.

“Minhyun?” Seongwoo mumbles once his vision clears up and his ears do not feel like they have been stuffed with cotton balls. And then he promptly throws up again.


	10. Chapter 10

“What is it?” Seongwoo asks, making sure he wipes his dirty hand on his jeans before taking the small ring-size thing that Minhyun is handing to him, saying it’d help with his heart rate. It looks like some kind of a pager.

 

“A tally counter.” Minhyun says, zipping up his belt bag. He is a regular boy scout, alright, taking  out some wet tissues and a small bottle of water from it after Seongwoo has finished throwing up again. “My mom used those at her store to count the merchandise, but I find it helps with focusing. Just click and breathe in sync.” 

 

Seongwoo clicks on the small metallic button and breathes in with it.  _ One _ .

 

His heart hasn’t totally calmed down yet but it is better. He is not at least on the ground, shaking himself back and forth.  _ Two. Three. _

 

“How’d you find me?”

 

“I didn’t see you in your bed so I went out and track your traces.”

 

“Really?” Seongwoo asks, impressed as Minhyun guides them with a flashlight through the trees.

 

“Actually, I heard you shouting and came running in the general direction of it.”

 

Seongwoo glares at him, and clicks.  _ Twenty-two. Twenty-three. _

 

“Did you call me Seongwoo?” Seongwoo asks, remembering a distinct vague voice. “Earlier.”

 

“Familiarity helps when you are having an anxiety attack.” Minhyun easily replies.

 

“I was not having an attack.” Seongwoo mumbles. “Just a little… break down.”

 

“Well,” Minhyun turns back and smiles at him. “Better not make a habit out of it. Sir.”

 

Seongwoo rolls his eyes and looks around. To him, the trees still look the same. “Where are we?”

 

“Not that far from the house actually. A little closer to the highway than to the stream.”

 

Oh, maybe that’s why Minhyun was able to hear Seongwoo. And sure enough, the silhouette of the house comes against the dark sky comes into his sight as he follows Minhyun through a right turn. 

 

It feels kind of dumb now, for Seongwoo to have been embarrassing like this, when he was barely a kilometer or two away.

 

“Can we keep this between ourselves?” Seongwoo asks Minhyun. “Not really looking forward to the glorious shit talk I am gonna get from the kids.”

 

“Of course,” Minhyun nods. “It’s nothing to be embarrassed about though. You are unfamiliar with the area, and it is a wooden terrain. Plus you were also drunk.”

 

“Still would not stop Jihoon from laughing in my face.”

 

“Probably not,” Minhyun agrees easily. “They are good friends though, you know. They worry about you.”

 

“They do?” Seongwoo gives an unbelieved laugh.

 

“Yes, they do.” Minhyun says as they get closer to the house, and Seongwoo’s heart is not finally beating like a drum. “Jihoon and Woojin came to me when I first started.”

 

“For … what?” Seongwoo furrows his brow.

 

“I think it was while you were in a class. They saw me and came to ask me if they should be mindful of anything or if there is anything they should be doing since you were in a position that needs more security.”

 

“Oh.” Seongwoo did not know that.

 

“And Jaehwan, well, I think him being suspicious about the lunch lady being a North spy was a bit far-fetched, but he tends to look out for you too.”

 

“Well, I guess they are afraid their lives will be even more boring without me.” Seongwoo laughs, flustered.

 

Minhyun opens the front door for him so Seongwoo steps in, heading towards the kitchen to grab some water. 

 

“Do you want some juice?” He asks when Minhyun passes by the kitchen, holding up the half empty orange juice carton.

 

“I .. alright.” Minhyun nods. “I am just gonna go and shower quickly.”

 

“Right.” Seongwoo grimaces, remembering that he did throw up on Minhyun.

 

The clock in the living room is ticking 15 past 3. Seongwoo wonders how long he was out there - knowing himself, it probably was only about ten minutes or something. Seongwoo shakes his head and grabs his phone he found lying abandoned on the coffee table. Never going anywhere without his phone again.

 

Minhyun walks back in while Seongwoo was about to finish his own glass of juice. He smells like standard soap but Seongwoo feels like he cannot get enough of the smell.

 

“Thanks,” Seongwoo hands Minhyun a disposable cup filled with juice, and says.

 

“I was just …”

 

“I swear to god, I will throw this juice in your face if you say you were just doing your job.” Seongwoo cuts in, and Minhyun returns an amused look. “I know it is your job, but can you at least let me thank you?”

 

“You are welcome, sir.” Minhyun finally says and sits down next to him, laying the small towel on his wet hair. He looks like a strangely handsome Japanese ramen chef. “Are you not going back to sleep?”

 

“I don’t feel sleepy anymore.” Seongwoo replies. “I don’t even feel drunk anymore. I think I either sweated or puked all of the alcohol.”

 

“Shame,” Minhyun says and pulls his bare legs peeking out of his board shorts onto the couch. “At least, you won’t have a hangover tomorrow.”

 

“Yeah, not crying about that one.” Seongwoo shakes his head, and his eyes get caught on something. “What is ..” Seongwoo points at the long vertical scar running across Minhyun’s calf. “.. that?”

 

“A scar.”

 

“Thank you, Captain Obvious.” Seongwoo rolls his eyes. “I mean, how did you get it? It’s …” He barely restrains himself from touching it. “... so long.”

 

It is more visible because Minhyun somehow does not have any leg hair. Seongwoo wonders if he waxes. Truth be told, Seongwoo wouldn’t be too surprised if he does.

 

“Cut myself open on glass.” Minhyun shrugs. 

 

“Were you like tarzaning your way into a glass window or something?” Seongwoo asks frivolously but from the way Minhyun goes strangely silent … holy shit.

 

“Holy shit, you actually did, didn’t you?”

 

“It is not anything fancy.” Minhyun laughs. “Part of a rescue op and all the exits were blocked.”

 

“Fuck. That’s badass.” Seongwoo mutters. “Tell Woojin about it and he’ll like worship you forever. He’s been wanting to do one of those stunts for so long.”

 

“It does not feel as badass,” Minhyun runs a finger along his scar, and Seongwoo cannot tear his eye away from it.  Minhyun’s finger looks like they would be suited more to hold a pen or a brush than a gun - an artist’s hand, if you will.

 

“You said you wanted to write.” Seongwoo says. He knows he is bringing it up out of the blue, but he hasn’t been able to stop thinking about it, about Minhyun, lately. “What did you want to write about?”

 

Minhyun looks a little lost. “I don’t know. I’ve never really thought about it.”

 

“Really?”

 

“Yes,” Minhyun nods. “It was a childhood dream, you know. I think I was mainly reading manga and my sister’s romance novels when she was not around. Maybe I’d be a romance writer. Who knows? I could have been the next Nicholas Sparks.” 

 

“You don’t strike me as a romantic type.” Seongwoo says and then immediately regrets it. “Sorry, that was a little out of line. It is just I’ve never heard you mention a significant other, but I guess you don’t really need to, huh?”

 

Minhyun leans forward and puts his cup onto the table. “I don’t have one, if that’s what you are asking.”

 

Seongwoo does not know what he is asking.

 

“It is not because I am not a romantic type.” Minhyun winks at him. “It is just a little difficult to keep a relationship in this line of work.”

 

“Plenty of the agents in mom’s security details are married.” Seongwoo tells him.

 

“I know.” Minhyun nods. “A lot of my colleagues are also either married or dating. I think they are lucky. To find someone who they think is worth trying for.”

 

“You haven’t found yours yet?”

 

Minhyun shrugs. “No I haven't, but I haven't been looking. At least, I know it is not going to be from the pool of girls my parents are setting me up with or the already very limit single people at my work.”

 

Seongwoo laughs. “And you even got stuck with just me for six months. Sorry.”

 

“You are not a burden.” Minhyun says and Seongwoo looks up at him. “I don’t know why you keep thinking yourself as something I have to bear with, but it is not like that. I will admit that I was not fully happy to take on this job.”

 

“I knew it.” Seongwoo mumbles.

 

“But the Chief of Staff hand picked me because he knew I can do this better than anyone and I am not gonna prove him wrong. Sure, it maybe not as thrilling to not have people shooting at me every turn of the day, but you are never a burden to me. I genuinely like being around you and it is an honour to me to work for you. I want you to understand that.”

 

Seongwoo stares at him, and Minhyun does not look away until Seongwoo nods with a soft ok.

 

“I think …” Seongwoo says, and stands up. “... I am gonna try and catch some sleep.”

 

“Ok,” Minhyun nods, but grips Seongwoo’s wrist when he tries to walk away. “Here, keep this.”

 

Seongwoo looks down to see the small tally counter he has put on the table before. Minhyun is pressing it into his palm and folding his fingers over it. “If you feel scared or anxious, use this to focus. And if you need anything, call for me. I’ll be right there.”

 

Seongwoo stares down at Minhyun’s hand over his, and then up at Minhyun, who is looking up at him. The lights are still off in the living room, but the kitchen’s light is on so a soft glow is illuminating the left side of his face.

 

Seongwoo grips the cold tally counter tight and leans down.

 

Minhyun does not punch him in the face, but he does not kiss him back as well. Seongwoo pulls back when he realizes and flushes. 

 

“I am sorry. I …”

 

“Sir.” Minhyun simply says and that is it, isn’t it? The  _ line  _ between client and him that Minhyun has always put so much emphasis on.

 

“I am sorry.” Seongwoo dry swallows and says through his teeth. He is a big boy - he can do this. “It was inappropriate and I should not have done that.”

 

“It is not …” Minhyun says. “You know it can’t happen.”

 

“Right.” Seongwoo laughs, even though he is finding zero humour in the situation. “Of course. I am sorry. Good night, Minhyun. I will see you in the morning.”

 

* * *

 

It would be a lie to say Seongwoo has woken up, because he never got  to sleep well. He keeped getting jolted awake randomly - sometimes because Jaehwan kicked and sometimes because of the pure mortification and humiliation that ran through his brain. 

 

He does not know what he was thinking (the answer obviously is that he was not thinking at all). He is attracted to Minhyun - Seongwoo is not that dumb to not know that. Minhyun is handsome and has the body of a god; Seongwoo gets the physical attraction, but here is the kicker. He thinks he actually likes Minhyun properly. The kind that makes him want to be around Minhyun and wants to make him happy and smiling. He cannot even blame on the lack of dating he has done since mom took office on this, because he does not remember feeling like this for anyone at all.  

 

Seongwoo is not clueless. He knows that he cannot date anyone unless it is a girl (and even then, it is a risk) as long as mom holds office. She is apologetic for it, Seongwoo knows, but it is what it is, and Seongwoo does not feel like being the first sacrificial martyr to challenge the century-deep bias of this country. He can wait, and he was never one who wants to be in a relationship.

 

But Minhyun - strange, boring, rigid, beautiful, kind Minhyun. He comes over and knocks down Seongwoo’s house of cards with a swish of his ridiculous trench coat.

 

Seongwoo feels a little resentful towards him for that.

 

“Get up, losers!” Someone bangs on the door and Seongwoo pulls his head up to see Woojin hitting the bedroom door with an empty pan, looking like an evil gremlin. “I am making breakfast, something extremely greasy so you two better get up and help.”

 

“No, kill me instead.” Jaehwan groans next to him, but eventually gets up after a series of threats from Woojin.

 

“Hyung, you are not getting up?” Jaehwan asks, leaning over Seongwoo to grab his toiletry bag. 

 

“Five minutes.” Seongwoo mumbles. He is going to sort things out with Minhyun today, this morning in fact, but he has no idea where to start or how to even face Minhyun.

 

“Ok,” Jaehwan just mutters and leaves. Seongwoo pulls the thin blanket around him tighter, and closes his eyes. The living room gets immediately noisy with the voices from Jaehwan and the two Parks so Seongwoo sighs and pulls the blanket over his head, shoving it further into his pillow. 

 

He thinks he must have actually fallen back asleep because he wakes up to someone shaking his legs. 

 

“Sir. Seongwoo. Please. You gotta get up.”

 

Seongwoo opens his eyes and sees Minhyun hovering over him against the sun. He wonders if he is dreaming but Minhyun smells too familiar and too close to be a hallucination.

 

“What is it?”

 

“We have to go.” Minhyun’s face is grim, more serious than Seongwoo has ever seen him, and Seongwoo immediately sits up.

 

“Is everything alright?”

 

“There has been ... “ Minhyun says slowly and Seongwoo notices that he is holding both of Seongwoo’s hands. “... an assassination attempt at the summit.”


	11. Chapter 11

“Which channel?” Woojin’s hands are shaking. It is weird how Seongwoo is just focused on that one thing - Woojin’s trembling hands on the old small remote.

 

“Any one!” Jihoon almost yells. Seongwoo wishes he is not yelling because it is noisy and makes his head hurt more. He tries to speak just that but his mouth is numb, the same as the rest of his body. Minhyun is running around him, picking up this and that, and Jaehwan is next to Seongwoo, saying something so low that Seongwoo does not actually catch it.

 

The TV turns on and there is a grim looking reporter wearing too much makeup standing next to a screen showing the commotion at the Presidential service. People are running around, and there are way too many soldiers in uniform and oh, that is Ms. Kim pulling out her gun and running out of the camera frame. And then …

 

And then there is his mom. She went down like a flower that has been cut, gracelessly. Seongwoo barely gets to see her shocked face for a split second before people gathered around her and she disappeared, probably pulled out to somewhere. Sungwoon went with them - Sungwoon whose white shirt is soaked in blood, his mom’s blood, and who looks the worst that Seongwoo has ever seen him.

 

Seongwoo kind of want to laugh. Sungwoon would have hated seeing himself like this on television.

 

“Turn it off.” Minhyun’s sharp voice cuts through and Seongwoo blinks.

 

“Are we going now?” he mumbles; he is not sure if the words are coming out but they must have because Minhyun nods.

 

“Let’s move now. We can make it back to Seoul before noon. Jihoon, the car …”

 

“Go, hyung.” Jihoon says, grabbing the remote out of Woojin’s hand and shutting the TV down. “I’ll call my grandma to pick us up. Don’t worry.”

 

Minhyun grabs Seongwoo’s hand and tags a little and Seongwoo nods aimlessly, following Minhyun, dazed.

 

“Hyung,” Jaehwan comes with them all the way out. “She’ll be ok, but you have to be strong, ok?”

 

“I am not.” Seongwoo half laughs, half cries.

 

“You are.” Jaehwan squeezes his hand that Minhyun is not holding. “I know you are. Good luck, hyung. We will come see you soon.”

 

* * *

 

 _Two hundred and seventy-two._ The weather is far too nice for a day like this. _Two hundred and seventy-three._

 

His mom is allergic to penicillin, and Seongwoo cannot reach Sungwoon. _Two hundred and seventy-five._

 

He hopes Sungwoon remembers. He will ; he has always been good at these kinds of things.

 

The cold metal of the tally counter presses into Seongwoo’s palm and it hurts a little. _Two hundred and eighty._ He does not want mom to be in a lot of pain. She is just like him - cannot stand pain in any capacity.

 

“Seongwoo…” A hand lands on his thigh and Seongwoo turns around to see Minhyun handing him a paper bag whose smell just makes Seongwoo wants to throw up. “You have to eat something.”

 

“I am not hungry.” Seongwoo mumbles. “Can you please just drive?”

 

“We have to fill the gas.” Minhyun says but Seongwoo knows that  - he does not need to explain. Seongwoo is not a child even if he is as scared as one right now.

 

“Please.” Seongwoo closes his eyes and feels them wet. _Two hundred and ninety-four._ “Just drive.”

 

“Ok.” Minhyun softly says and his hand squeezes Seongwoo’s thigh. “It will be ok.”

 

Seongwoo doubts it.

 

_Three hundred._

 

* * *

 

“Are we not going to the hospital?” Seongwoo asks as the car turns into the street next to the Seoul National Hospital.

 

“We have to go through the basement.” Minhyun answers. “Too many reporters camping out front.”

 

“Right.” Seongwoo nods as the car dives into the parking slope and takes a couple of turns before ending up in front of an elevator.

 

Seongwoo gets out of the car before Minhyun does, and heads towards the elevator. There are three security guards in suits and a couple of soldiers armed in rifles standing in front of it. Seongwoo vaguely remembers them from the House.

 

“Which floor is it?” He asks, and one of the guards lead him inside the lift.

 

“Eight, sir. May God be with you.”

 

If God can help now, Seongwoo will pray until his mouth bleeds.

 

The eighth floor is a flurry of doctors and nurses rushing around, and yelling. Nobody pays him any particular attention, but Minhyun pulls him into a room. The sign on the door reads ‘Private Waiting Room’ and it is even more heavily guarded than the elevator in the basement.

 

Sungwoon is inside, sitting on a chair, hands clasped in between his knees. His shirt is even bloodier than Seongwoo remembers seeing on TV, and his mop of a brown hair is almost touching his knees but he looks up when he hears the door opened.

 

“Seongwoo, I..”

 

“You were there!” Seongwoo does not know where this sudden rage comes from, but he lunches forward, pulling Sungwoon up by his shirt. Sungwoon comes easily and Seongwoo realises how much smaller Sungwoon is than him despite him feeling like larger than life most of the time. “How could you let this happen?!”

 

“Seongwoo!” Minhyun’s hands are on his biceps but Seongwoo does not budge.

 

“You promised, hyung!” Seongwoo yells and Sungwoon blinks up at him. “You promised me you’d take care of her!”

 

“I’m sorry.” Sungwoon says in a voice Seongwoo has never heard before - broken and scared. It’s too wrong. His hyung does not get scared. Not like that. “Seongwoo, I am so sorry.”

 

Seongwoo’s hands slipped from Sungwoon’s shoulders to his arm, and Sungwoon’s face gets distorted in discomfort and pain. Seongwoo looks down and Sungwoon is bleeding, not just the blood from his mom. He has several cuts on his forearm.

 

“You are bleeding.” Seongwoo notes lamely.

 

“I fall down and got cut.” Sungwoon says. “It’s nothing. Come on. Sit down.”

 

“You should go and get it treated.” Seongwoo says. “And get changed. There is a nurse outside.”

 

“Don’t worry about me.”

 

“Hyung, please.” Seongwoo sighs. He feels like he is on the verge of breaking down into tears but the worry and the anxiety is stopping it. It is almost ridiculous how much he just wants to sit down and cries, but he cannot. “I don’t want to sit and face my mom’s blood.”

 

“I .. yeah, of course. I’ll go change into something. Agent Hwang, you got him, right?”

 

“Yes, sir.” Minhyun says and Sungwoon disappears out of the room. Seongwoo slumps down into the chair that Sungwoon vacated while Minhyun stands next to him.

 

“How’s her condition?” Minhyun asks one of the guards.

 

That should have been the first thing Seongwoo did instead of picking a useless fight with someone who does not have anything to do with this. Seongwoo is too bad at this. He is not prepared, or has it together enough to handle something like this.

 

“She’s been in surgery for the past five hours, sir.” The guard responds. Five whole goddamn hours. “Take it as a good thing, sir. That means she’s fighting for her life out there.”

 

Seongwoo does not want her to be in a position where she has to fight for her life. She is supposed to be just here, scolding Seongwoo because he somehow got lost in a forest while trying to pee and making sure he is taking those nasty herbal vitamins that she swears by.

 

She is not supposed to be lying down in a surgical room two doors away, fighting for her goddamn life.

 

Sungwoon comes back into the room in a shirt that is too large for him and they sit there side by side for a while, Sungwoon absently patting Seongwoo’s knee until some NIS agents come to take him for witness statement. Minhyun has left sometimes back as well and Seongwoo remembers that he probably hasn’t eaten either.

 

Minhyun comes back in after a while, a streaming mug in his hand.

 

He quietly kneels down in front of Seongwoo, passing the warm mug into Seongwoo’s hands and encompassing them with his own.

 

“It’s Chamomile tea. Drink it.”

 

“I am not hungry.”

 

“Seongwoo, please.” Minhyun softly says. “It’ll calm your nerves and you haven’t eaten anything for the whole day. Just drink a little.”

 

Seongwoo glances down at the tea before taking a sip, and it burns through Seongwoo’s mouth.

 

“Are you ok?” Minhyun’s hand is suddenly on Seongwoo’s cheek, his thumb running at the under jaw of the side where Seongwoo is sure he winced.

 

Seongwoo nods. “Hot.”

 

“Take your time drinking it.” His hands leave Seongwoo and Seongwoo loses the relative calmness he’s had for a brief minute. “I’ll be right here.”


	12. Chapter 12

Seongwoo wakes up, which is strange because he does not remember falling asleep in the first place. His mouth does not feel clean and there is an unpleasant aftertaste lingering in his throat.

 

“Seongwoo, hey.” Right. The reason for him waking up. Sungwoon is in front of him, shaking his shoulders. “She’s out of surgery.”

 

“Shit!” Seongwoo shoots out of the chair so fast that he almost sends Sungwoon go flying. “How is she? Is she ok? Is she in a lot of pain? Can I see her?”

 

Sungwoon puts a hand on Seongwoo’s arm. “Hey, it’s alright. She’s alright. Breathe. The doctors said the worst is over but she has to be put in the ICU for a couple of days for monitoring. You can go see her, but she is probably unconscious.”

 

“I want to.” Seongwoo swallows his tears. “I want to see her.”

 

“I know.” Sungwoon rubs his hand up and down Seongwoo’s arm, and leads him outside. “They say she is … it is a bit intense, you know, all the tubes and machines. You might want to prepare yourself a little.”

 

“But she is alive, right?” Seongwoo asks and the fact that he has to ask this question in the first place makes him want to break down into pieces. “Breathing?”

 

“Yeah, yes.” Sungwoon nods. “You know how stubborn she is. She won’t leave you.”

 

“Ok,” Seongwoo nods and follows Sungwoon up a floor through the lift, and down a corridor until they are in front of the closed off ICU area.

 

“Go on,” Sungwoon nudges him as one of the nurses open the door for him.

 

“What about you?” Seongwoo blinks.

 

“Family only for now.” Sungwoon smiles up at him.

 

“What?! That is such bullshit..”

 

“Hey, hey.” Sungwoon interjects him. “It’s ok. She can’t handle too many people visiting her now. You go and make sure she is alright for me, yeah?”

 

“I am sorry, hyung.”

 

“Don’t be. And don’t cry in front of your mom. She hates it.”

 

Seongwoo tries. He really did, but the floodgate opens as soon as he sees mom, lying on a white bed frame, hooked up with so many tubes and pipes that he does not even know where those ends and where she begins. She is wearing hospital pyjamas, the ones with little smiling cartoon bears on it, and they look ominous to him like they are laughing at him breaking down into tears next to his unconscious mother.

 

He wants to say something like _hang on_ or _i’ll be here_ or _you can do this,_ but the only thing that comes out of his mouth are broken sobs and he is so glad the nurse let him go in by himself. He wants to hold her or touch her, to be sure that she is still here but she looks as fragile as a flower that barely survives a hurricane and Seongwoo couldn’t bring himself to touch her.

 

She makes a low grunt, and Seongwoo immediately collects himself, rushing towards the head of the bed.

 

Her eyes are open. They don’t look clear or conscious, but they are open, and they blink for a few times before closing back. Seongwoo hits the panic button and two nurses come running in.

 

“She blinks.” Seongwoo says in a rush. “And then she .. I don’t know .. fainted? Again. Is anything happening to her? Oh god.”

 

“Her vitals are normal.” One of the nurses say, loud enough to cover Seongwoo’s mumblings and he breathes out, thankful. “It’s good that she is responding to you, sir. But she’ll be slipping in and out of consciousness for a while. Dr. Lee is outside, and will brief you on her full condition.”

 

“Ok.” Seongwoo nods and wipes his face with the back of his hand. “Ok. Please take care of her well.”

 

* * *

 

Sungwoon is not outside when Seongwoo gets out of the ICU, after being briefed by Dr. Lee. He keeps saying how lucky his mom is that the bullet miss the heart by a good distance, but to be honest, Seongwoo has been feeling a little short of luck lately. One of the guards informs him that Sungwoon has left to meet with an NIS agent and Seongwoo nods, exhausted. He can’t imagine the pressure Sungwoon must be under right now, from having seen mom getting shot in person to being coherent enough to give statements (and knowing him, probably arranging manhunts himself) to having to help run a country - Seongwoo has heard him on phone with the Vice President in the waiting room earlier.

 

He notes to apologize to Sungwoon later for his childish outburst, and decides to take the stairs back to the waiting room. Minhyun was not around when he wakes up and Seongwoo does not know where else to go, so he is just going to head back for now.

 

He stops himself before opening the Emergency Door towards the staircase because there are noises coming from there, one of them familiar.

 

“You said you’ve had it under control!”

 

“I did! We had them, hyung. We really did for the past four days. I pinned down the location, and was ready to storm, but there gotta be some leak. They ghosted yesterday, but shit, I didn’t think they’d strike this soon.”

 

“Well, guess what, Daniel, they did. They fucking shot the president in front of my eyes!”

 

“Hyung …”

 

“I can’t… I can’t let anything happen to her. Do you understand?” Sungwoon’s voice is breaking and Seongwoo does not think he has ever heard Sungwoon cries like this. “How am I going to face Seongwoo if anything happens to her? How am I going to live with myself?”

 

“I know,” the voice that replies is a stranger’s, soft and raspy. “I am sorry, baby. I really am, but not everything is your responsibility.”

 

Seongwoo leaves the doorway, and heads towards the lift. He knows Sungwoon is dating; it is difficult not to notice the signs, but he never asks because mom didn’t want him to pry and Sungwoon has a PhD in deflecting and changing subjects, but he does not imagine that Sungwoon is dating someone much closer than Seongwoo would have thought.

 

Minhyun is in the waiting room when Seongwoo steps in.

 

“Hey,” he immediately crosses over to Seongwoo and lays a hand on his shoulder. “How is she?”

 

Seongwoo wonders if this skinship lately comes from pity.

 

“Sleeping,” Seongwoo answers. It sounds much nicer than unconscious. “The doctor said they’ll have to keep her in the ICU for the next 72 hours and then move her to a regular room. The surgery will take some weeks to heal, and then some more months for physical therapy.”

 

“That’s good.” Minhyun nods. “That’s great news. You did well.”

 

“Did you drug me?”

 

“What .. I ..”

 

“My anxiety was so bad I’m pretty sure I won’t just fall asleep. What’d you put in the tea?” Seongwoo narrows his eyes.

 

Minhyun sighs. “I am sorry. It’s just that you were going out of your mind and I don’t want you to collapse before you can see your mom.”

 

“I was being a little asshole, right?” Seongwoo smiles. He is surprised that this is the first time he had smiled today, and even more surprised that he means it. “I am sorry. I need to apologize to Sungwoon hyung as well.”

 

“He’ll understand.” Minhyun says placatingly. “So, what’s next? Are you staying here overnight? I don’t think they will let you go back to the dorms, I am sorry.”

 

“It’s fine. I’ll probably stay here.” Seongwoo shakes his head. “Maybe get a shower or something. I smell like a skunk.”

 

“I will go see what I can do.” Minhyun says and leaves. Seongwoo kind of wants to ask him to stay but he is trying to not act on a whim if he can help it.

 

Sungwoon comes back after a while. The tip of his nose is red, and everyone can probably tell that their Chief of Staff has been crying, but no one says anything. And neither does Seongwoo.

 

“I talked to Dr. Lee.” Sungwoon says.

 

“Yeah, me too.” Seongwoo nods.

 

“Ok, alright. I am gonna send Guanlin down to the Residence to grab some of her stuff. Maybe you should go and take a rest.”

 

“No, no.” Seongwoo shakes his head. “I’ll go. I know where all her stuff is.”

 

“Are you sure?” Sungwoon asks, concerned.

 

“I’m fine, hyung.”

 

“Ok.” Sungwoon nods. “I’ll ask Minhyun to drive you. Where is he?”

 

“He went out for a while. I told him I wanted to shower here.”

 

“You wouldn’t like the showers here.” Sungwoon smiles. “They have that nonadjustable shower heads that you hate. Go home and shower.”

 

“I am sorry, hyung.” Seongwoo blurts out. “For taking it out on you. You’ve probably had it worse than me, but I came in, yelling at you like a spoiled brat.”

 

“Seongwoo, hey,” Sungwoon cuts in. “You were worried about your mom. I understand.”

 

“Maybe you do but I still am in the wrong.” Seongwoo nods. “She is not … I know she depends on you a lot, but it is not on you that this happened. And I am sorry I made it sound like it is.”

 

Sungwoon smiles, reaching up to twirl Seongwoo’s front hair. He taught Seongwoo how to do that with a curling iron when Seongwoo was still in high school.

 

“You grow up a lot, Ong Seongwoo.”

 

“Hyung, please.” Seongwoo shakes his head and laughs. “I am only a year younger than you.”

 

Sungwoon nods and pats Seongwoo in the arm. “I’ll ask them to prepare you a room, alright? But only for tonight and maybe tomorrow. You need to move back into the Residence afterwards, at least for a while, until the situation is under control.”

 

“Why can’t I just stay here?” Seongwoo pouts.

 

“You can visit her every day, but hospitals have visiting hours for a reason.” Sungwoon says. “Plus, NIS has safety concerns so they might work on moving her back to the Residence as soon as we get the green light from the dcotors. She can recuperate there.”

 

“That’s good.” Seongwoo nods. Mom has always hated hospitals.

 

Someone knocks on the door and Seongwoo looks up to see a tall guy in plain clothes. “Sir, the HQ is requesting your presence. The VP is already in the situation room.”

 

“Is it the shooter?” Seongwoo asks in a rush. “Did you find them?”

 

“I..” the guy says. “I am sorry, sir, but you don’t have the clearance.”

 

“She is my mother!” Seongwoo yells in disbelief.

 

“Seongwoo, hey, calm down.” Sungwoon pushes a hand on his chest and says. “I am sorry but we cannot let any detail out right now, not because we don’t trust you but it is extremely sensitive and uncertain. You understand, right? I will be there in a second, Agent Kang. Are we doing live video conference?”

 

“Yes, sir.” Agent Kang nods. He does not look that much older (maybe even younger) than Seongwoo. Seongwoo wonders how many college age agents NIS is recruiting. “They are ready for you at Room 702.”

 

“Copy that.” Sungwoon nods.

 

“Daniel?”

 

“Hyung! Minhyun hyung!” Agent Kang, Daniel apparently, replies; Seongwoo did think that voice was familiar. “You are not in the field? Oh right, the assignment. I’ve heard.”

 

Seongwoo does not need to ask to know what _the assignment_ is.

 

“Agent Hwang.” Sungwoon cuts in. “You are here, good. Please drive Seongwoo to the Residence so he can pick up a few personal things for the President. Take one of the bullet proof vehicles, and can you also brief the head of staff at the Residence on the situation? I need you to straighten out the security details on the Residence with the head of Residence security as well.”

 

“Sure, sir.” Minhyun nods. “Seong.. Mr. Ong, are you ready to go?”

 

“Yeah.” Seongwoo nods. “Hyung. I’ll see you later?”

 

Daniel says something in lowered tone, low enough for Seongwoo to not hear. He wonders if it is another security clearance thing as well. Minhyun briefly nods at him before leading Seongwoo towards the lift.

 

“You know Agent Kang?” Seongwoo asks as they step into the lift.

 

“Yes. He was recruited two months after me. We stuck together because we were rookies, and we used to go onto a lot of field missions together.”

 

“I see.” Seongwoo nods, although he does not. More and more, he is starting to realise that there is just a whole side of Minhyun that Seongwoo just would not be able to see.


	13. Chapter 13

"Eat something first." Minhyun gets into Seongwoo's way after he leaves mom's bedroom, her clothes and personal items shoved into one of his bags. "The staff made you some toast."

 

"I am not .."

 

"You haven't eaten anything the whole day." Minhyun cuts in before Seongwoo can protest. "Maybe you don't think you are hungry, but your body needs the food."

 

Seongwoo sighs. He does not think he can keep any food down, but he is also feeling extremely weak and tired right now.

 

"What about you?" Seongwoo asks as he follows Minhyun into the dining room. "Let's eat together. Tell the staff to set one more plate."

 

Surprisingly enough, Minhyun does not object, so Seongwoo finds himself eating cheese toast and warm milk in the Blue House's dining room with Minhyun sitting next to him.

 

"Jaehwan called." Minhyun says after a stretch of silence. "They got back to Seoul about two hours back. Jihoon's uncle picked them up."

 

"That's good." Seongwoo nods and swallows the toast, which he is sure is very delicious, but its taste does not register to him because his entire body is still numb. He feels a little bit more awake and alert after a shower, but it still feels like he is walking in someone else's dream, dazed and confused.

 

"He'll drop by at the Residence maybe tomorrow." Minhyun continues. "Let him know if you need anything from the dorm."

 

"Ok." Seongwoo nods again. "I'm finished."

 

"We can go." Minhyun easily answers even though he is still only half way through his toast.

 

"Finish your food. It's fine." Seongwoo shakes his head. "Hey, do you know what's going on with the shooter? I mean, you are probably gonna play that clearance card in my face again, but ..."

 

"I don't either." Minhyun interrupts. "It's on a need-to-know basis, and I am on a completely different assignment."

 

"Well, maybe you'll be in the need-to-know circle if the shooter comes after me later." Seongwoo scoffs and says flippantly.

 

"Don't."

 

Minhyun's tone is stern enough that Seongwoo looks up from where he is playing with the coaster. 

 

"Don't joke about that."

 

Well, fat chance because bad humour is how Seongwoo copes with a lot of things. 

 

"Will you avenge me?" Seongwoo smiles and flicks the coaster towards Minhyun. Minhyun easily stops it with his index finger. 

 

"I will not let it happen in the first place."

 

It is sweet, Seongwoo thinks, but his mom has 20 Minhyuns around her before she got shot in the chest, so forgive him if he is not feeling over confident at this point.

 

"I mean it." Minhyun repeats as if he can read the doubt on Seongwoo's face, and reaches over to squeeze Seongwoo's hand briefly. "I won't let anything happen to you."

 

* * *

 

 

Mom is still  _asleep_ when he gets back to a hospital and with Sungwoon still being in the call with the Blue House situation room, Seongwoo decides to call it an early night, even though the clock is ticking past 1 AM right now.

 

God, just barely 24 hours ago, he was drunk and lost and having an anxiety attack in a forest somewhere in Masan. How time changes.

 

Someone knocks on the door, and an agent comes in on Seongwoo's answering 'yes?'

 

"Hello, sir." He says, showing his badge to Sungwoon. "I'm Agent Han. I'll be your guard for tonight. I'll just be outside the door, so let me know if you need ..."

 

"Agent Han?" Seongwoo tilts his head to see Minhyun standing in the doorway behind Agent Han. "It's ok. I am taking the shift. You can check in with Mr. Jeong later."

 

"Agent Hwang." Agent Han's brows furrows. "I thought HQ wants you to log off a bit since you have been active for quite a while."

 

"I am good." Minhyun smiles and steps inside until he is standing next to Seongwoo. "I am the First Son's primary security detail, anyway."

 

Agent Han shrugs. "Your call, sir. Have a good night, Mr. Ong."

 

Seongwoo nods after him dumbly as Agent Han turns to leave before turning to Minhyun. "You should rest. Even your bosses think you should rest."

 

"I am fine." Minhyun says. "There are also six rotational guards on this floor for tonight and twenty more downstairs, so we are pretty secure."

 

"All the more reason for you to rest. You didn't even get to sleep that much last night because I ... well, you know." Seongwoo flushes, suddenly remembering why he was feeling like his world was crashing down before his world actually came crashing down. Thinking back though, he is not even that distraught over that one kiss anymore because perspective is a wonderful thing. It also helps that he has mostly forgotten amidst everything that happened today. He hopes Minhyun does too. It makes Seongwoo a little sad, but he hopes Minhyun forgets too.

 

"I'm good." Minhyun says and takes seat in the lone sofa in the room. Seongwoo feels a little bit skittish that they gave him a private hospital room for the night like a hotel, but NIS quoted security reasons and the hospital is not letting any one stay around his mom in ICU for more than a couple of minutes due to immunity concerns, so he does not have a lot of choices. "I'll get someone to change shift with me if I am too tired."

 

"You have to admit you are tired first." Seongwoo mutters to himself and climbs into the single bed. "Shit, forgot my eye mask."

 

"We'll turn off the light." Minhyun says and gets up from the sofa.

 

"Oh, so you can see in the dark now, too?" Seongwoo scoffs and Minhyun just gives him a slight wink before turning off the lights. 

 

It is not completely dark because the hospital is surrounded by skyscrapers whose lights are still shining in through the blinds, and Seongwoo can hear the hushes and shuffling of feet outside his door. The bed is comfortable, but it feels strange and it is a little creepy to have a figure sitting in the corner of your eye.

 

"Can you like," Seong mutters. "...move to the left a little bit? I keep seeing you from the corner of my eyes, and get scared."

 

"Thank you." Minhyun laughs but moves so he is sitting out of Seongwoo's sight. "Very glad to know that I am scary."

 

"You are scary." Seongwoo mumbles. "Sometimes. Mostly you are just a big old fluffy cat."

 

"I think I prefer being scary."

 

"That's exactly what a cat would say."

 

Minhyun laughs ; Seongwoo did not see it, but he can hear it. They settle into the comfortable silence - well, not total silence, but more of a subdued quietness, for a while before Seongwoo speaks out again.

 

"Hey. Minhyun. I am sorry."

 

"For what?"

 

"Last night. Before I went to bed."

 

Minhyun sighs. "You said that already. Multiple times."

 

"I know," Seongwoo says. "I just want to reiterate because the more I think about it, the more I feel shitty. I shouldn't have done that. It was unprofessional, actually, no, I don't work  _for_ you or  _with_ you, more like I made you unprofessional, but that isn't right either. I abused my power? Do I actually have any power over you?"

 

"I know what you mean." Minhyun interjects and Seongwoo lets out a grateful sign of relief because for a moment there, he was drowning in his own word vomit. "No, you do not abuse your power over me, and it was not affecting anybody's professionalism. It was just ... a momentary lapse in judgement."

 

That somehow sounds even worse to Seongwoo because then, it sounds like it is wrong. It might be a mistake, but it did not feel wrong to Seongwoo. Oxymorons are Seongwoo's best friends. 

 

"It implies that I possess judgement in the first place, so..." Seongwoo goes for a jovial tone because again, self-deprecating humour in the times of desperation? Nailed it. "Let's just call it me projecting my unwarranted feelings onto you. I am sorry. Again."

 

Minhyun is quiet for a while before he softly replies an "Apology accepted."

 

"Ok," Seongwoo says to nobody in particular. "Ok. Glad we have that sorted out."

 

"I am sorry too." Minhyun continues on.

 

"For what?"

 

"That I am not in a position to reciprocate."

 

Oh. 

 

Well, Seongwoo is not that much of a stranger to rejection anyway, but as far as those things tend to go, this one is on the slightly less harsh side. Doesn't mean it stings any less but he is not going to cry over it. 

 

At least, not tonight because his tear ducts have probably dried out.

 

Maybe tomorrow.

 

* * *

 

"Good morning, sir." 

 

Seongwoo hears the voice before he even opens his eyes. God, he is tired down to his bones and his entire body feels weighed down. He opens one eye to see the agent from last night, Mr. Han, hovering next to the door. "If you are awake, I can arrange for breakfast."

 

"Just.." Seongwoo rubs his eyes. "Coffee is fine. Thanks."

 

Agent Han nods and opens the door to talk to whoever is outside the door. Seongwoo stretches his limbs and tries to crack his neck to no avail. God, Woojin's alien ability to crack and pop his bones at will would really come in handy right now. 

 

"Where's Minhyun?" Seongwoo asks once Agent Han closes the door and turns to face him. "Agent Hwang, I mean."

 

"We changed shifts during early morning." Agent Han said and Seongwoo feels a little bit disappointed even though he knows Minhyun needs rest too. He should have said goodbye or anything, but knowing himself, Seongwoo was probably sleeping like the death. 

 

The coffee is black so Seongwoo only takes a few sips and just finishes the apple Agent Han brought along for breakfast. It is not anyone's fault, of course, that none of them knows Seongwoo's coffee preferences like Minhyun does, and he does feel like a spoiled brat, complaining about coffee while these staff are probably 10 times busier and doing far more important jobs than him, but having Minhyun around for these past few months had been just too good to Seongwoo, he guesses.

 

"Thank you," he says sincerely to Agent Han when he escorts Seongwoo up to see mom because he is not raised to be a spoiled brat (and also he is feeling a little guilty about thinking how Minhyun is a better personal body guard).

 

Mom apparently was conscious for a little while, enough for the doctors to do reflex tests and come out with positive results. Dr. Lee sounds hopeful, but she looks the same to Seongwoo - weak and vulnerable, two things Seongwoo is not used to associating with his mother. He helps the special nurse cleans her hands and feet - the only place she is allowed be cleaned for now because he does not want to feel too useless.

 

But then the extended family arrived and he was busier than he imagined being today - all the aunts and uncles and distant cousins that he does not see outside of holidays fill up an entire room. NIS wanted to screen all of them before letting them meet him or see the President through the clear glass panel of the ICU; it makes some of them grumpy but at least Seongwoo is glad that he didn't have to do that yesterday. But sadly, family affairs is not something a staff can help out - even someone as powerful as Sungwoon wouldn't be able to help, not that Seongwoo has seen even the shadow of the guy this whole morning, so Seongwoo grits his teeth and goes through the very nice but repetitive pitiful sentiments, and blocks all the probing questions and gossips with a straightforward "I don't have the security clearance and knows no more than you do about the assassination."

 

Maybe it was pretty smart of NIS to not grant him a clearance level barely above a civilian level when it comes to national security, because by the time the forth distant relative who he hasn't seen in two years asks if it was Donal Trump who planned this, he was very close to saying yes.

 

It was already past noon when people start leaving one by one until he is left with a few of the closer relatives, who plan to stick around until evening because Dr. Lee is optimistic enough to have 10 minute visiting slot for non immediate family members if mom is stable until evening. Since he is close enough with the two aunts that remain, Seongwoo decides he does not need to entertain them, and leaves them in the waiting room to get some air.

 

"Should I arrange lunch, sir?" Agent Han asks, and oh, he is still here.

 

Where the hell is Minhyun?

 

"I'll eat in the cafeteria. No need for them to make me separate lunch." Seongwoo tells him, and Agent Han nods.

 

"By the way, sir, the Blue House Residence called that a friend of yours is visiting. About ten minutes back."

 

Shit. Probably Jaehwan. Seongwoo almost forgets.

 

"Alright. Forget the cafeteria thing." Seongwoo says. "I'll eat at the Residence. Can you drive me back?"

 

"Sure, sir."

 

"Hey, erhm, did you hear anything from Agent Hwang? He's been MIA for a while."

 

"He was here, sir." Damn it. "But he got pulled into a meeting."

 

It almost feels like Minhyun is avoiding him (Seongwoo doubts it though because he does not think Minhyun is that kind of person) after last night, but they did clear things up, didn't they? Seongwoo is not that needy to say he misses Minhyun, but things are just a little bit better when he is around.

 

"Ok. Have you seen Sungwoon hyung also?"

 

"Chief of Staff?" Agent Han asks. "No, sir. I haven't."

 

Damn it, everyone is ghosting Seongwoo today.

 

* * *

 

 

"Dude, that was the most aggressive pat down I've ever experienced." Jaehwan complains as he follows Seongwoo into his room at the Residence. "And I've been patted down for a whole twenty minutes by TSA at LAX once." 

 

"Can't exactly blame them." Seongwoo shrugs. Even Seongwoo's belongings - mostly clothes and cosmetics - that Jaehwan brought over had been seized by the Residence security team until they had gone through each and every item.

 

"How are you holding up, hyung?" Jaehwan asks. "The news say the situation has improved this morning."

 

"It is." Seongwoo nods. "The doctors think she will be fully conscious by tomorrow."

 

"That's great! Oh damn, dude, how can you stay in that coffin of a room at the dorms when your room here looks like this?"

 

"It's too big." Seongwoo says and jumps onto the bed. He won't complain about this bed though - it is probably made of feathers shred by a fairytale swam or something. Seongwoo sinks into it every time. He would totally take this to his dorm if it wasn't half the size of his dorm room. "I've lost way too many things in it."

 

Jaehwan sits down next to him, whistling and bouncing a little. "I am glad your mom is ok. Everyone is panicking, you know. Even Jihoon does not come back with us to Seoul."

 

"Huh?" Seongwoo exclaims. "Why?"

 

"His grandma thinks it is too dangerous for now. Hell, even my mom wants to like stay out of city for a while. Woojin's parents are asking him to come down to Busan for a while too." Jaehwan says. "Our president got shot on live TV, hyung. People are scared. And there is nothing on who is the shooter and if he is caught or if it is dangerous out there."

 

"Well, if you are asking me," Seongwoo sighs. "I don't have the security clearance to know that or tell you that."

 

"You are the First Son." 

 

"Yeah," Seongwoo scoffs. "Go figure."

 

"Jisung hyung is talking about cancelling the musical."

 

"What? No!" Seongwoo exclaims. "Dude, we've worked so hard for this. Hell, Jisung hyung worked even harder like he spent the last six months on this musical only."

 

"Yes, but you will have to drop out, no?" Jaehwan asks. The upcoming musical had gone from the top to the rock bottom of Seongwoo's priority list within two days, so he has not thought about it yet, but Jaehwan is right. There is no way he can give his 100% to the musical at this point of time, and Jisung's precious brainchild deserves a lead actor who can fully practice and deliver.

 

"Jinyoung is a perfectly capable understudy." Seongwoo says even though every word pains him. Jinyoung is indeed good, but he is way too young and does not have enough stage experience to lead a 40-minute musical. 

 

"That's what Jihoon said too." Jaehwan replies. "He said he's coming back to Seoul as soon as his grandma stops panicking, and then he is going to train Jinyoung from the ground up until he is perfect."

 

"Let's not scare a 20-year old into leaving the theatre world for good." Seongwoo shakes his head. "But, I will talk to Jisung hyung later. He can't cancel it. We've already sold a good amount of tickets."

 

"You know half of those are sold to the people in Jihoon's Overwatch GC, right?" 

 

"So? Audiende is audience." Seongwoo shrugs. "Hey, you want to have lunch here? I don't know what they are making but I can ask if you want ..."

 

"Nice." Jaehwan takes his hand and high fives it by himself before Seongwoo can finish.

 

Well, it is nice to know that some things are still constant like how Kim Jaehwan is still a fucking dweeb.


	14. Chapter 14

Jaehwan leaves after lunch, and Seongwoo plans on returning to the hospital, but Agent Han informs him that the Chief of Staff is back at office, and wants to see him so Seongwoo heads towards the Blue House accompanied by Agent Han and two more security details. The security is insanely tight around here - they didn't even give back Seongwoo's hairspray because  _further investigation is needed._ It wasn't even that good of a hairspray.

 

Sungwoon is pacing back and forth in front of a white board filled with words that look like gibberish to Seongwoo when he gets to the Chief of Staff office. He stops though, once he spots Seongwoo and motions Seongwoo to follow him into his private office.

 

"Hey. Sorry I haven't been around." Sungwoon asks once they are in the office and he locks the door. "How are you?"

 

"Dealing." Seongwoo shrugs. "Have you got a chance to see mom yet?"

 

"I will drop by evening before the visiting hours are over." Sungwoon smiles and points at the couch. "Sit."

 

Seongwoo does not like this.

 

"We need you to do a press statement."

 

Seongwoo really does not like this.

 

"Hyung, no!"

 

"Seongwoo." Sungwoon sighs. "Please."

 

"I don't like doing public speeches!" Seongwoo reminds him. It is ironic, he knows, because he is training to be a profession actor on stage and yet he breaks out into bucket of sweats and twitches in bundled nerves every time he has to talk as Ong Seongwoo and not as someone else he is pretending to be, in front of an audience.

 

"I know that. I would not ask if it is not necessary." Sungwoon says. "The President is doing better. She might even be out of ICU by Wednesday and we need to let people know that."

 

"So? That's what the press secretary is for!" Seongwoo argues. "Or get the VP to do it. It'll give more gravitas. The VP is a very intimidating dude."

 

"It has to come from a personal perspective so we can provoke a little more sympathy and reassurance." Sungwoon sighs. "Look. The approval ratings have been going down since last night ..."

 

"The ratings are what you are worried about, seriously?" Seongwoo almost yells. "It's already a miracle if she heals without any complication. Who gives a fuck about the next election?!"

 

"Approval ratings are not about the next election!" Sungwoon replies sternly. "It is about how much confidence a country has in its president, and right now, it isn't much. I know that it is not her fault getting shot, but people are scared, Seongwoo. We have to give some reassurance to the mass, and also remind them that end of the day, she is just a woman doing her best. And all of that will come off better if you are up there on that stage instead of that opportunist asshole of a VP. He's already going around giving interviews on things he should not be saying."

 

Seongwoo sighs. See, this is why he hates politics. Nothing is what it seems, and everything has at least three different sides and four more hidden agendas. 

 

But he kind of understands. Jihoon having to stay in Masan, and Jaehwan leaving the Residence earlier to spend the nights at his parents'. He might be clouded by the fact that the President is his mother first before the leader of a country so he does not really think about how frightened and uncertain everyone else might be feeling.

 

Seongwoo recedes. "Is it a very long speech?"

 

"No, no." Sungwoon shakes his head fervently. "5 minutes top. 4 if you don't breathe. Hang on. Guanlin, can you bring Mr. Ong's speech inside? Thanks."

 

"Urgh. I hate when you call me Mr. Ong."

 

"I don't like it too, pal." Sungwoon says. "But formalities. Thanks for doing this, Seongwoo. Really."

 

"Well, anything for the nation, right?" Seongwoo laughs and thanks Guanlin who comes in and hands him a piece of paper. The speech, as promised, is short enough to only last a couple of minutes, so small miracles.

 

"When am I supposed to do this?"

 

"In half an hour."

 

"What the fuck." Seongwoo exclaims. "Hyung, how am I going to memorise all this in the next 30 minutes?"

 

"You don't. There is a teleprompter." Sungwoon easily replies. "Guanlin, can you take Mr. Ong to hair and make up and maybe get the Press Secretary to brief him a little bit? I'll come down to the Press room before it starts to check in, alright?"

 

"What would you have done in 30 minutes if I said no?" Seongwoo grumbles and Sungwoon raises an eyebrow. "Right. Of course, you knew you can make me do it."

 

"I am very confident in my persuasive power, yes." Sungwoon nods. "Hey, Guanlin, do you know who Naver is sending?"

 

"I can check, sir. It is probably Lee Jinwoo journalist."

 

"Fuck him. He wrote that bullshit fear mongering article this morning. Check, and if it is Lee Jinwoo, tell Naver to send someone else or no one. And make sure to tell the Press Secretary to remind all journalist that no question or hollering is allowed at the First Son."

 

"Noted, sir." Guanlin nods. "Anything else?"

 

"Yeah, tell whoever is still in the situation room that when I asked for hourly update, I meant hourly update, not when their pesky selves feel like it, and if I have to call them first to get an update, they will also get a fire lit under their hairy asses."

 

"Word for word, sir?"

 

"Maybe paraphrase it a little."

 

"Well," Seongwoo says as he gets up from his seat. "Nice to see you are back to your charming self. Can I go now?"

 

"Yeah," Sungwoon waves him off. "I'll see you later. Good luck."

 

* * *

 

Getting his hair and make up done by three people at the same time is not an unfamiliar thing, but having hit with things to do and not to and how to talk ( _neither too loud nor too soft; emotional but stable; sad but hopeful_ \- Jesus, even his Emotional Expression class finals aren't this hard) by a very flustered and exhausted press secretary is. But still, Seongwoo takes all the advice he can get because he is scared out of his fucking shit.

 

30 minutes pass by in a snap, and soon, Seongwoo is dressed in a suit that feels far too expensive for someone who is sweating profusely, and is peeking into the press room where all the journalists who seem like they can't wait to chew his flesh and spit his bones out are seated.

 

"Where is the Chief of Staff?" He turns and asks Guanlin because he really could use some moral encouragement right now, even if it is from Sungwoon.

 

"He's tied up, sir." Guanlin answers without even looking up. "He says he wishes you all the best."

 

"Tell him I hope he grows even shorter."

 

"I would not, sir." Guanlin answers. "I value my life."

 

Seongwoo grumbles but the press secretary pats him on the hand before going out first to quickly introduce and announce his statement and oh god, this is it. It is fine. Really. Only about 50 million people will be watching him. But then, people overseas would probably be also interested in the First Son's first address on the condition of the South Korean president, and holy shit, that is way too many 50 millions.

 

He is truly sorry to the make up artists for ruining their hard work by destroying half of the make up on his forehead with his sweat.

 

"Hey," A familiar voice says and Seongwoo turns to see a very welcome face. 

 

"Shit, Minhyun! Where were you?" Seongwoo blurts out and tenses up when he hears commotion from the press room. "Fuck, do I need to go? Is that my cue?"

 

"Not yet, sir." Guanlin leisurely answers.

 

"Hey," Minhyun says again and grabs the tissue one of the staff is approaching Seongwoo with. "I'll do it. Thanks. Hey, Seongwoo, you will do great, alright? No need to be scared."

 

Seongwoo vaguely registers the fact that Minhyun is dabbing the sweat off of Seongwoo's face over the pounding of his own heart. 

 

"Just ... breathe, and maybe pretend you are just acting, in front of these people. It'll just be a monologue. You've done a monologue so many times before."

 

"No, no." Seongwoo shakes his head. "I don't want to come across as fake. I need to do this at least for my mom."

 

"Ok," Minhyun nods and the hand on Seongwoo's forehead stops. "Ok. There is a clock in the room. If things get too intense, focus on its ticking, like you did with my tally counter, and breathe. And I am here, ok? There is nothing to be afraid of."

 

Seongwoo would like to object that there are a lot of things to be afraid of right now, but he can be a little bit braver knowing that Minhyun is at least here, and that he is doing this for mom, and also reluctantly, for Sungwoon. Fuck. He has worn nude colour tights on stage and _danced_. This should be a piece of cake.

 

"That's the cue, sir." Gunalin says. "You will be up in 3..."

 

"I am right here."

 

"...2, 1. Go."

 

* * *

 

"I should not have fucking stuttered."

 

"Hey," Minhyun turns to him and says. "It was barely noticeable, and if anything, that makes you look human."

 

"Well," Seongwoo looks down at the messages from Sungwoon on his phone, and some others that kept coming in from his various group chats. "Chief of Staff says it is getting good traction, so I guess."

 

"See." Minhyun smiles. "I told you you'd do great."

 

"Where were you earlier?" Seongwoo asks, and he wishes his tone did not come out as accusatory as it was.

 

Minhyun's pace slows down a little. They are walking back to the Residence through the garden path so Seongwoo can shower again and take off all this make up and hairspray before heading to the hospital. The garden is bare, a lot of the trees have succumbed to the heat of the sun and it is quite a shame because other times, it is a very beautiful garden, and Minhyun would have loved it. Minhyun loves nature - his phone background is even a forest scenery, which for most people, Seongwoo would have attributed to a boring personality, but with Minhyun, he knows that it is because Minhyun truly loves looking at it.

 

"I visited my parents and my sister."

 

Well. Shit. Now, Seongwoo really wishes his tone did not come out accusatory. Some days, he is going to have to stop spinning the world around himself. 

 

"Of course." He quickly says. "They'd be worried. How are they?"

 

"Well, they weren't particularly worried about me." Minhyun laughs softly. "I don't mean they do not care. They just ... had gone through a lot of more intense stuff, and they knew I was out of town and safe. They were just more worried about what is going to happen to the country. But we talked, and I told them I'd make sure that they are safe."

 

"That's good." Seongwoo nods. "I hope you did get some sleep though."

 

"I did." Minhyun smiles. "That's why I was MIA. I'm sorry. I was also possibly in a food coma. My mom makes the most amazing cold noodles. I will ask her to make you some time."

 

"That'd be nice." Seongwoo smiles and kicks a stray pebble off the path. "And no need to be sorry. I am just glad you were not avoiding me."

 

"I am not avoiding you." Minhyun says and Seongwoo has heard that tone of Minhyun's voice enough to sport the discomfort.

 

"You are lying." He turns to Minhyun and says. "Holy shit. Were you really avoiding me?"

 

"No, I..." Minhyun says. "Well, I am here, aren't I? I wasn't avoiding you. I just needed a little time to gather myself, and you are in the safest place in the city."

 

"Why would you need to gather yourself?" Seongwoo narrows his eyes.

 

"Seongwoo, you.." Minhyun laughs, almost disbelieved. "Never mind."

 

"No." Seongwoo stops in his track. "What is it?"

 

Minhyun runs his fingers through his hair, and his always perfectly coiled hair gets messed up. Seongwoo likes him like this better. 

 

"You basically confessed to me last night."

 

"I ..." Seongwoo blinks. "I did? Wait. I DID?"

 

"You said you were projecting your feelings. And I assume by feelings, you don't mean a brotherly bond. Unless, you did for some strange reason." Minhyun says.

 

Shit. He really did. Didn't he? And then Minhyun said he cannot reciprocate Seongwoo's feelings and right, there is that pinching sharp pain in his chest cavity again. He remembers now.

 

"Oh god," Seongwoo whines. "Why do I keep fucking things up?"

 

"You did not."

 

"No, don't be nice to me just because." Seongwoo shakes his head. "I wanted to apologise for kissing you out of the blue and then I somehow went and told you that I actually really fucking like you."

 

"You didn't..." Minhyun replies, unsure. "Until now. You just talked about your feelings. For me."

 

Fuck him side-way with a cactus. 

 

"Well, call me a medical wonder because my mouth apparently is disconnected from my brain." Seongwoo sighs and says. "How about we forget this conversation, and the one from last night ever happened? I don't want to put this kind of burden on you, and if I somehow fuck up again, which I'll probably do in like next ten minutes, just tell me to shut the fuck up and not make you uncomfortable."

 

"Seongwoo, I am not uncomfortable."

 

"Look, man. It's fine. It probably is not the best feeling in the world to have to keep rejecting some dude who honestly just sticks his foot in his mouth 24 times a day." Seongwoo sighs.

 

Minhyun blinks. "When did I reject you?"

 

Seongwoo blinks back. "Erm. Last night? You said you don't reciprocate my feelings."

 

"No..." Minhyun says slowly. "I specifically said I am not in a position to reciprocate your feelings."

 

"That's the same damn thing!"

 

"It really is not, Seongwoo." Minhyun says, and Seongwoo kind of wants to shake him by the shoulder and just ask him to use simple elementary-grade words. Maybe a chart or a pictionary so Seongwoo can understand him a little easier. "I work for you. I am responsible for your safety above all, and I cannot cross the lines that will impact my job. I can't ... afford to be emotionally involved."

 

"Are ..." Seongwoo blinks. "Are you? Emotionally involved?"

 

"It won't be a good idea for me to answer that."

 

"Fuck. Minhyun!" Seongwoo yells, frustrated. "What does it even mean? I don't have enough brain capacity for this right now."

 

"It means, I don't think we are in a position right now to be whatever we could have been under different circumstances. You are still reeling from the president's situation, and my job just gets a lot more serious because there is very real danger present, and I don't want to risk your safety because of us. I cannot tell you what you should do, but for me, I want to do this job for you, effectively and without anything that might screw up my judgement."

 

"I ... " Seongwoo starts, and completely loses his trains of thoughts because, Minhyun is right in one thing. This is not the time or place Seongwoo has the luxury to think about his crush. He has been emotionally drained over the past two days, and while he wants to yell at Minhyun for being a confusing and infuriating bastard, Seongwoo is not going to make the same mistake of letting his emotions over run his mind again. "I cannot deal with this right now."

 

"It is fine." Minhyun says and nudges him until Seongwoo starts walking again. "You need to take this time to focus on yourself, and I will be here. I am sorry that I can't do anything more than that, but I will be here."

 

"And if the circumstances are different?" Seongwoo asks. "If let's say, this is all a dream, and mom somehow manages to reunify the North and the South in two months and there is peace all across the country, will you do something else?"

 

"Yes," Minhyun says resolutely. "I will withdraw from this assignment."

 

"I don't mean career-wise!" Seongwoo flusters.

 

"No, you don't get it, Seongwoo." Minhyun answers. "I do not get involved with colleagues or people I work for. If, well, if the world is perfect, I want to start anew with you."

 

"Oh," Seongwoo says and then he starts laughing because it is a ridiculous situation, and there is not really anything else he can do but laugh at it. "We are screwed, aren't we?"

 

"Depends on how you look at it." Minhyun replies. "Nothing has to change."

 

Oh, but everything has.

 


	15. Chapter 15

Seongwoo thinks when push comes to shove, he can be a mature, grown-up man instead of the walking disaster mode that he usually defaults to.

 

Over the next seven days that mom has to spend in the hospital (she regained complete consciousness after three days; tears were shed and hugs were abound), Seongwoo busies himself with handling the relatives, dodging the reporters to personally go and inform Jisung that he will be dropping out from the musical even though all the production crew can basically guess that and to encourage Jinyoung a little, finishing up his papers for the courses he can handle so that he does not have waste another year on the same class, and saying 'No comment' to any press who manage to catch him off guard and before Minhyun drags them away by their collars.

 

He does not talk to Minhyun about anything personal and anything that might consider to be  _crossing the line._ No, he is not acting petty or doing it out of spite, but he is handling things he never thought he would have to do (it is very possible that he had been a very naive dude until last week). It gets a little easier after the doctors deemed that mom has recovered enough to be moved back to the Blue House residence with a live-in doctor, and two special nurses. His days are mostly taken up spending time with her, mostly to make sure that she is not sneaking in too many documents to read over and approve (there is no way he can stop her, so he just makes sure she is not over exerting herself), and other than that, to help her with the physical therapy and the recovering process.

 

It is not a very emotionally pleasant exercise to keep seeing the person you love in pain and suffering, no matter how strong his mom tries to act in front of him, so Seongwoo thinks nobody can blame him if at times, he just lays his head down in the crook of Minhyun's neck in the middle of quietness that surrounds his large and bare bedroom at the Residence. At least, Seongwoo knows Minhyun does not because he'd wrap an arm around Seongwoo, and do that half-squeezing, half-rubbing thing he does with his hand on Seongwoo's shoulder, and Seongwoo can feel a little bit at peace. They don't talk a lot these days, but Minhyun is a steady solid presence next to him that is very much need for Seongwoo, and Seongwoo has never been particularly good with his words unless he is writing them down (and editing them a thousands times)

 

On the bright side though, he gets a higher security clearance level, mostly because he complains about having to go out of the room all the times when the NIS head agents (and sometimes Sungwoon) come over to update mom and get approvals on the next proceedings. Sure, he is not granted anything higher than a Blue House intern, but at least he knows a little bit more than public. For now, the shooter has been pinpointed to an extremist North group, although the North Korean government is rigorously denying their involvement. And surprisingly, NIS seems to agree that it is the work of a lone organization without a government form of backing. There has also been carefully leaked information so that the public does not panic but not too much so that the assassins can get wind of it and ghost.

 

Something that Seongwoo knows but the public is not aware of is that NIS had tracked most of the group to Beijing, and there are talks about Chinese government getting involved, and even Seongwoo knows that while Chinese government does not have the authority to grant asylum to a group who has been declared as international terrorists, and one who actually shot a fucking President, the Chinese can make it a lot harder for them to get to the terrorists once there has been some kind of backdoor deals made.

 

Seongwoo is also aware there is some kind of guerrilla mission going on  - not that anyone tells him in details; he just pieces some conversation and some information from here and there together. One thing he knows for sure, though, is Kang Daniel is involved, either heading the mission himself or just as part of the squad.

 

If Seongwoo has not heard Kang Daniel and Sungwoon on that fateful day, he would have never once thought that Daniel is Sungwoon's secret beau. Gotta hand it to them though, because they are the epitomes of professionalism and neutrality when it comes to their public interaction. Seongwoo does not think he has heard the two of them exchange more than four complete sentence at one time. And every time Seongwoo sees Daniel around, he just wants to turn to Minhyun and asks him why he can't be like them? He knows that both he and Minhyun has different and very logical reasons, but at his most selfish hours,  Seongwoo just wants to be happy. And he wants Minhyun to be happy.

 

* * *

 

"Agent Kang." Seongwoo nods politely when he sees Daniel coming out of the Blue House. Minhyun has an NIS briefing this morning, and Seongwoo is just dropping by at Sungwoon's office with some of the melons that his aunt has air flown for mom. Apparently, being the First Son does not dissolve you from being the mom's errand boy. Go figure.

 

"Mr. Ong. Sir." Daniel nods. He has the kind of face that changes with an expression. Like right now, he looks stern and serious and Seongwoo would not doubt that he can probably kick Seongwoo's ass in a flat second, but then, he has also seen Daniel looking like a personable and downright jovial young man in front of his mom, and according to some of the staff (who Seongwoo totally does not gossip with), he can also smile like a little kid and makes everyone around coo over him.

 

Well, right now though. He is not smiling. He looks annoyed at best, and angry at most to be honest.

 

"Is everything fine?" Seongwoo asks, despite the chance that Daniel might not tell him, because well, firstly he is curious, and secondly he wants to know.

 

"I was in a meeting with Agent Hwang, sir." Daniel says. Daniel and Minhyun get along well, more than well, actually. There is a kind of camaraderie and history whenever they talk to each other, an ease that Seongwoo irrationally envies.

 

"Did you guys have a fight or something?" Seongwoo asks.

 

"No, sir." Daniel shakes his head. "Are you heading somewhere?"

 

"Just walking back. Minhyun hasn't come out of the briefing yet?"

 

"No, sir. Department heads still want to talk to him."

 

Seongwoo kind of worries that Minhyun might be in trouble, but Minhyun has been ... well, Minhyun for the past few weeks. The perfect quintessential NIS agent, so he buries his useless worries.

 

"I will walk you back, sir." Daniel says. "I am not sure how much longer Agent Hwang will take."

 

"Erm, ok." Seongwoo nods and lets Daniel open the door for him.

 

They walk in awkward silence before Seongwoo decides to break it and ask Daniel how he knew Minhyun, if they had worked together before.

 

"We were recruited together, sir. I mean, he was from the Marines and I was from Air Force, but we joined NIS in the same batch. And we went on a lot of missions together because we get along and can support each other well."

 

"You seem mad at him now though." Seongwoo says. "Just before, when you say his name. It's like you want to put a curse word in front of his name if you could."

 

Daniel does not say anything but stares at him.

 

"What?"

 

"Nothing. Just .." Daniel shakes his head. "Agent Hwang says you are good at reading people and knowing them. I guess he is right."

 

"He ... did?" Seongwoo mutters.

 

"He talks about you if that's what you are asking." Daniel says and Seongwoo wants to ask him what he thinks Seongwoo is asking him.

 

"Can I know what this morning briefing is about?" Seongwoo asks instead.

 

"We .." Daniel starts. "I think you are aware of the Beijing mission. Pretty difficult to miss for anyone who's constantly been in the Blue House these days."

 

"I do." Seongwoo admits. "But hey, to your guys' credit, I know shit other than something is gonna go down in Beijing, and you are gonna go after those sons of bitches."

 

"We are, sir, but we need good resources, not a lot but good resources, because we can't afford a fanfare. And Agent Hwang is not only familiar with the language, but he has been on several missions to Beijing. He knows the terrain well and has a lot of local contacts."

 

Oh.

 

They want Minhyun to join them.

 

"Did he say no?" Seongwoo asks. Daniel does not answer.

 

"Did he say why?"

 

"I think we both know why." Daniel adds in. "Sir."

 

And that is actual bullshit, because what does Daniel want Seongwoo to say? That he is the reason Minhyun is refusing an assignment? That he is somehow responsible for Minhyun's decisions? No, fuck that. Minhyun is an adult and they are not in any position for Seongwoo to have any effect over what he does or not. 

 

"Agent Hwang is," Daniels says. ".. he is a lot more sensitive than he lets on, and sometimes that does not work out well for him because he has a very clear idea of who he wants to be and when he cannot live up to that, it is only him that gets hurt."

 

"What is the point of this conversation, Daniel?" Seongwoo asks, not caring the formality or official titles. Daniel is younger than him anyway. "Whatever you are implicating about me and Minhyun, it is not a thing so I am sorry your best friend will not join your superhero squad, but I don't know what you want me to do about it."

 

"I don't think you can do anything about it, sir." Daniel says and stops. Seongwoo realises that they actually had walked all the way back to the Residence. "I don't care if he never goes on another mission again. I just want him to be happy and I want, well, I hope you can give him a chance at that."

 

"Well," Seongwoo laughs. "He has to want that chance first."

 

* * *

 

"NIS has done with the background check on the crew and the audience for the musical on the 30th, sir." Minhyun says, later that evening. They are in Seongwoo's room, well, Seongwoo has been in the room all evening; Minhyun just comes in to talk to him. "We'll have to do a location check on the day itself but I don't see any issue with you attending."

 

"That's good." Seongwoo nods. He might have to drop out from his musical, but damn if he is not going to show up to give all his support. But then again, there are security concerns and shits so he compromised and told NIS that they can go ahead with _non-intrusive_ checks as long as he can attend it. "Is that all?"

 

"Yeah," Minhyun nods. "That's all."

 

"Ok. Is that a new book?"

 

Minhyun raises the book he is holding in his hand. "Yes. I figure since you are now increasing the physical therapy sessions with the President to two hours, I'll get some reading in."

 

"Chinese again, is it?" Seongwoo laughs dryly. "That's good. You should brush up on your Mandarin. Or is it Cantonese? I don't know which one Beijing use."

 

"Seongwoo.." Minhyun says. He only calls him Seongwoo when he wants to be taken seriously, which is ironic because Seongwoo can barely focus on anything every time his name rolls off of Minhyun's tongue. "Do you know?"

 

"Do you want to take up the mission, Minhyun?"

 

"I .. no, I declined."

 

"You are still a terrible liar." Seongwoo shakes his head. "I want you to go. No, that does not come out right. Of course, I don't want you to go and face someone who is insane enough to shoot my mom, but I want you to take it if you want it."

 

"I don't." Minhyun answers. "That's why I said no."

 

"Minhyun, look, do me a favor and cut the bullshit, alright?" Seongwoo sighs, tired. "You are not happy here. Don't give me that look. You are not. I am not saying you are being tortured and your soul is being crushed every day here, but you know that you are being under utilised. Hell, the closest I have ever seen you to geeking out is when you are talking strategies with Daniel. There is literally zero job satisfaction for you here."

 

"You are here." Minhyun says and really, what exactly is he expecting Seongwoo to respond?

 

"Yes, and every single day, both of us are living in utter bliss with you standing exactly ten feet behind me and moping like a drowned puppy. I have never been happier." Seongwoo rolls his eyes. "I don't want to be the kind of person who ties you down, Minhyun."

 

"You are not," Minhyun crosses the distance between and sits down next to him on the bed. "It is my decision to make."

 

"So, make it for yourself. I want you to be happy, Minhyun. Really. I am not saying you can't be here, but I know that you want to. I know that you understand your teammates need you and that this is what you were always meant to do. I don't want you to waste your skills and time watching me read my mom books every day. There is an entire agency that can take care of my safety and welfare, so I want you to go and be brilliant where you can."

 

"Maybe.." Minhyun breathes out. "Maybe I am selfish and I don't want to leave you."

 

"You are not leaving me because you are going to go kick some butt and come back to me." Seongwoo says decisively. "In prime condition because I have standards and you are barely reaching them."

 

That is such a lie it is even incredible Seongwoo can say it without breaking into laughter.

 

"You .. you are the exact one thing I don't want to happen to me, you know?" Minhyun says and what the fuck.

 

"Wow, thanks asshole. I take back everything I said about wanting you to be happy. Suffer."

 

"No," Minhyun shakes his head, and reaches until his hand lies on to of Seongwoo's knee. "I just mean that it is scary. I have seen a lot agents, older, younger, leaving their missions and giving up their life and years worth of training because of one singular person and that was the scariest thing to me. I thought it'd be a nightmare, to let someone have that much power over you."

 

If Minhyun keeps saying shits like this, Seongwoo is going to smoother him with his pillows until he just stops talking!

 

"I am sorry I am very desirable for you." Seongwoo flusters out after a while because yes, he is trying to be a mature person but using defensive humour in times of emotions is easier. "I will try to look uglier but I can't undo God's works."

 

"Oh my god," Minhyun's hand leaves his leg and Seongwoo wants to ask him to _put it back_. "You are so ridiculous. I mean, outrageous. I don't know why I like you."

 

Seongwoo blinks. "If the first time you are actually saying those words is in a negative context, I swear to god, Hwang Minhyun, I will .."

 

"I like you." Minhyun says over him. "I really, ridiculously, like you."

 

"God," Seongwoo grunts out. "Can you just like shut up and kiss me or something before I die of heart failure here?"

 

Minhyun laughs but does as he is told. Well, he has always been good at following orders.


	16. Chapter 16

"Agent Hwang resigned today." Sungwoon says during breakfast.

 

One of the good things (or the bad depending on the day) about Seongwoo moving into the Blue House Residence and his mom being home bound for a while is the regular meals that they can have together because her special nurses are very strict about eating the exact required amount of nutrition at the same exact appropriate time declared. Plus, she is now able to sit for a good fifteen minutes without hurting herself so it feels more like a regular family meal whenever they eat.

 

Sungwoon sometimes drops by during breakfast when he has to update mom on anything that happened over night and needs her attention because apparently, nobody in that office ever sleep, or when he is not off somewhere terrorizing some poor ambassador or minister.

 

"Seongwoo's agent?" Mom asks. "What is the reason? Isn't he one of the new NIS ups and comings?"

 

If this was not his mother that is sitting across him, Seongwoo would have made a very lewd innuendo about how up and coming Minhyun can be.

 

"NIS wanted him for Operation Opera."

 

Operation Opera because is going down in Beijing, really? The government really is not a place for creativity to thrive, huh?

 

“But even NIS cannot pull someone from PSS rotation by veto, so he resigned first and NIS immediately assigned him."

 

Well, that was fast. Of course, Seongwoo knows the timetable is pretty tight, but it hasn't even been 24 hours since Minhyun has left the Residence to take care of administrative matters.

 

"You don't look that surprised, Seongwoo." Mom says and Seongwoo shrugs.

 

"He told me beforehand. I mean, he is my bodyguard, of course, he'd tell me first."

 

Mom nods. "He sounds like a great agent. If NIS assigned him immediately, they must have been waiting on their toes for him."

 

In a way, Seongwoo is proud because fuck yeah, his (probably and hopefully) boyfriend is James Bond, but the reality that Minhyun is going to be away soon, going to an unknown place for an unknown amount of time, and most frighteningly, he is going to be facing something dangerous, not Seongwoo-eating-questionable-food dangerous, but real, life-threatening spy-movie kind of danger.

 

Minhyun has survived this long in NIS doing exactly this kind of things, so maybe Seongwoo is over reacting and being a drama queen, but it is difficult to shake off this kind of fear, and Seongwoo suddenly loses his appetite.

 

Luckily for him, mom makes a small noise, her telltale sign that she is starting to feel the ache in her bones from having to sit too long, so Seongwoo does not have much time to dwell onto his fear, and helps mom get up and do some simple movements that the doctors say will help with the pain overtime.

 

Only Sungwoon finishes his entire breakfast spread before the staff comes and cleans it away, and Seongwoo helps mom back into her room, taking away half of the papers from the binder Sungwoon has brought for her to sign. She can take a look at them after lunch later.

 

Sungwoon is still in the Residence talking on the phone when Seongwoo gently closes the door to mom's room behind him.

 

"Those papers are for the President to sign." Sungwoon says as he hangs up the phone.

 

"These are too much to do at one go." Seongwoo shrugs and puts them in the safe in the lounge. "Hey, an idea. Maybe you can just sign as her."

 

Sungwoon glares at him. "Yes, going to jail for treason is on my bucket list."

 

Seongwoo laughs. "She'll get those signed by end of day, alright?"

 

"Fine." Sungwoon sighs. "Ask Guanlin to come pick them up once she's done."

 

Seongwoo nods and shoves his hands into his pajamas pockets. "So? Who am I getting? In place of Minhyun."

 

"I don't know, actually." Sungwoon replies. "NIS has taken over all security aspects so they will be taking this up as well."

 

Damn. Sungwoon might be a hardass to deal with, but at least Seongwoo knows how to deal with this hardass. NIS is a whole other story, primarily because Seongwoo is scared of like half of them.

 

"Do you  have any preference or request?" Sungwoon asks. "I can tell them to take it into consideration."

 

"Not really," Seongwoo pouts and tickles his toe with the carpet lining. "I think Agent Han is good? He fills in for Minhyun sometimes and he is nice."

 

"I think Agent Han is shift-based, so not sure how it is going to work out. But I'll let them know for what it's worth." Sungwoon replies. Right. Agent Han once told Seongwoo about his very adorable toddler son (because apparently the toddler and Seongwoo has the same taste in cereals and Seongwoo is not sure if that is something he can be proud of), and Seongwoo does not think family men are going to be lining up to work as a live-in bodyguard, even in this political climate.

 

"Thanks, hyung."

 

"It is a good choice, you know." Sungwoon continues. "For Minhyun. The team really needs him and he has been out of field for a while. It'll be good for him."

 

Seongwoo scoffs. "Does Agent Kang tell you that?"

 

The only features on Sungwoon's face that betray his neutral expression and show a hint of surprise are his eyes.

 

"I am not as dumb as you think I am, hyung." Seongwoo grunts. "I have eyes." And ears that got lucky and eavesdropped into a private conversation, but Seongwoo is not about to tell him that. He is trying to prove a point here.

 

"I never thought you are dumb." Sungwoon shakes his head. "A little bit naive and trusting, but not dumb."

 

"Well, nobody can be as suspicious and defensive as you, ok? It is exhausting." Seongwoo complains. "Anyway, introduce me to him in a personal capacity sometimes. I mean, I didn't grow up under your thumb all these years to not exact revenge and bully your boyfriend now."

 

"You don't listen to me enough for me to have you under any of my digit." Sungwoon rolls his eyes, but he does not refute anything. "And yeah sure, why not? We can do a double date with you and Minhyun."

 

"What the hell!"

 

"What?" Sungwoon smirks. "What was that line you were saying about having eyes again?"

 

"We are not ... well, I don't want to say we are not a thing, but I don't know what we are."

 

Sungwoon grabs his bag. "Well, if you want to figure that out, do it fast. They leave in three days."

 

* * *

 

"Sir, your car is ready." The front gate calls and Seongwoo gives them a rushed affirmative before running back to his wardrobe to get his pants on. That's the downside of having a hugeass bedroom because the distance between the landline and the wardrobe literally takes him twenty steps to cross.

 

He is running late. The musical is starting at 6 and it is already 5:35. Even without considering the Seoul evening traffic, he is not going to make it in time. Seongwoo barely remembers to pocket his wallet and phone before he finishes dressing and goes running out of his room, straight towards the black tinted car parked there waiting for him.

 

Agent Han is not available this evening, and he said two of the other agents in Seongwoo's personal rotation (yes, he has a personal security rotation details now involving of 5 freaking agents because NIS is a dick) will accompany him. Seongwoo wonders if he can persuade the both of them to break the speed limit in the name of the First Son not getting murdered by Park Jihoon.

 

"Sorry." He pants once he climbs into the back seat. "So sorry. I .. can we .. holy shit. Minhyun? What the hell are you doing here?"

 

Minhyun is there, in flesh and blood, sitting in the driver seat with his ridiculous RayBans and a ridiculous form-fitting leather jacket like he is the reincarnation of James Dean.

 

It is just unfortunate that Seongwoo agrees.

 

"I asked a favor to your agents to give me their shift. But, to be honest, that was not the reaction I was expecting." Minhyun turns half way and smiles, and god, Seongwoo misses that stupid asshole so much even if it has only been two days. Seongwoo is not sure how he is going to deal when Minhyun actually leaves.

 

"I miss you very, very much, but can you drive and talk?" Seongwoo insists. "I am like dead late."

 

"So demanding." Minhyun shakes his head in amusement but starts the car and once he gets out of the Blue House and gets onto the road, Seongwoo climbs over the gear panel into the front seat.

 

"What are you doing?!" Minhyun squeaks as Seongwoo butts into his shoulder and almost falls head down into the seat.

 

"This is better." Seongwoo grunts as he somehow gets into the passenger seat without miming himself, and grabs the seat belt.

 

"I could have stopped the car for you to come sit here like a normal person, you know?"

 

"I told you I am late. We don't have time for that." Seongwoo says, distracted with the belt. "Hey, do you like me enough to break the speed limit and like just Fast and Furious to the theater?"

 

"No." Minhyun answers, and Seongwoo pouts.

 

Minhyun sighs before taking out a siren from the glove box and putting it onto the roof of the car, the siren coming alive with an annoying and flashing noise through the traffic.

 

"You are the best." Seongwoo grins at him.

 

"I am already regretting it."

 

* * *

 

"I'm sorry I didn't call." Minhyun says. The siren is still noisy but not too much that they cannot talk over it.

 

"You couldn't even if you wanted to." Seongwoo shrugs. "Didn't you leave your phone at home?"

 

"Oh, right. You called, didn't you?" Minhyun asks. The assigned agents of Operation Opera, whose name gets more ridiculous the more Seongwoo thinks about it, have been in some deep dark super secret ninja training, apparently. Minhyun’s sister told him that when Seongwoo called Minhyun after two whole hours because he has zero patience, and she answered the phone. Seongwoo was not particularly mad that Minhyun did not tell him firsthand, because he imagined things would be rushed and hurried for Minhyun to be assigned to a mission this close to the launch date.

 

And to be perfectly honest, he is not sure which is better - for him to not see Minhyun until he gets back, safe and sound, or for him to say goodbye before Minhyun has to go. He was preferring the first option, choosing to go to the musical and probably getting drunk as fuck at the cast thank-you party that Jisung was nice enough to invite him to.

 

But now that Minhyun is here, Seongwoo is glad it didn't pan through.

 

"How's the training?" Seongwoo asks. Minhyun looks thinner, more toned and Seongwoo is willing to bet anything that if he takes off his jacket, there are going to be bruises. "Brutal?"

 

"I am a little out of practice." Minhyun shrugs. "But it is good to catch up and get back into shape."

 

Yeah, if Minhyun was not in shape before, Seongwoo does not want to know what he is.

 

"We don't have that much training window, so it was a little more intense, hence cutting off the outside world access." Minhyun continues. "I heard you want to go back to school."

 

"Aww ... you ask around your NIS agents about little old me?" Seongwoo flutters his eyelashes and Minhyun just shakes his head. "Anyway, yeah. I mean, mom is recovering pretty well so I think I can catch some end of the summer classes. NIS is still very firm against me moving back into the dorm, but they didn't refuse me outright so that's something."

 

"You want to move back?" Minhyun asks.

 

"Duh." Seongwoo answers. "I mean, don't get me wrong. I don't want to leave mom by herself for the time being so I won't move until she is well enough to get back into office, but after that, absolutely."

 

"Well, I hope this mission succeeds so at least the results from the threat analysis will be in your favor." Minhyun smiles.

 

"So, my fate is in your hand?" Seongwoo laughs. "Well, I hope the 48 hours long super intensive ninja warrior training pays off. How come they let you off today though?"

 

"Protocol." Minhyun shrugs. "Agents are given a day off right before the actual mission, for morale. And to spend times with family and friends."

 

"Am I stealing you away from your family?" Seongwoo blinks.

 

Minhyun laughs. "No, don't worry. I spent the entire day at home. I even made cookies with my nephew, which really strengthened my patience like no other training."

 

"That's good." Seongwoo nods. "I am glad you come to see me."

 

"There's nowhere else I'd be."

 

* * *

 

 

They are late, but not disastrously late. The play is only at Act I Scene II, and Jinyoung is up there, doing his first song routine. His eyes spark up and he almost smiles at Seongwoo once Seongwoo takes his seat in the front row with Minhyun. After this, Seongwoo is going to have to talk to Jinyoung about not breaking the character unless the roof is on fire.

 

They did great; Jihoon shines on the stage as he always does and Jinyoung does not forget his line or choreography, so that is a win in Seongwoo's book, especially considering Jinyoung's age and experience.

 

"They did great, didn't they?" Sengwoo turns to Minhyun as the curtain closes and the audience starts clapping - he is pretty sure the idiot that is wolf-whistling and chanting Jihoon's name is Woojin. "I mean, if the musical is already this good without even having _me_ as a lead, imagine one with me. It'd like break all the records."

 

Minhyun laughs but he looks sincerely happy so Seongwoo does not mind it. "You'll do great, Seongwoo. One day, that's gonna be you bowing on the stage, and I will clap twice as harder."

 

The next musical Seongwoo can realistically be cast in will be in about six or seven months. But he does not know if Minhyun will be back by then.

 

Seongwoo does not voice it though because this should be a night for celebration, not being emo.

 

"I am gonna go say hi to the cast in the backstage."

 

"Ok," Minhyun nods and puts a gentle hand on Seongwoo's waist, a solid presence right besides him, reliable and grounded.

 

Seongwoo is going to miss him so much.


	17. Chapter 17

The backstage is noisy and busy and full of people. Seongwoo is not even able to reach to Jisung who is drowning in people around him, and the bouquets that they are giving to him.

 

"Really glad I didn't bring flowers." Seongwoo mouths to Minhyun.

 

"You forget, didn't you?" Minhyun raises an eyebrow, and Seongwoo does not grace him with an answer.

 

Yes, he forgot. Sue him.

 

He eventually gets to talk to almost everyone, including a very hyper Jinyoung who won't stop going  _hyung hyung hyung hyung hyung that was so fun hyung i am so happy hyung did i do well hyung_. Seongwoo gets tired even listening to him. He gets to pull apart the two Parks momentarily to congratulate Jihoon and to tell Woojin to let his boyfriend breathe, which he is sure has no effect whatsoever. He even gets to congratulate Jisung after the crowd around him dies down, and to tell him personally that Seongwoo won't be able to make it to the after party.

 

It is not that Seongwoo does not want to spend the night with his theatre people, eating grilled meats and drowning questionable drinks, but he only really has Minhyun for the night, and he wants to be selfish a little.

 

* * *

 

 

"Are you sure you don't want to join them?" Minhyun asks once they walk out into the night. There are some security personnel that Seongwoo can see (he is getting better at spotting these people lately), but they leave him alone probably because they trust Minhyun enough to leave Seongwoo in his hand.

 

"Nah." Seongwoo shakes his head and climbs into the car. "Not feeling like it."

 

He can of course, say that he just wants to spend tonight with Minhyun, and just Minhyun but that sounds childishly clingy and needy even to his own ears.

 

"So, back to the Residence?" Minhyun asks. He looks disappointed, and Seongwoo thinks maybe Seongwoo is not the only one being uselessly needy.

 

"We can go back." Seongwoo agrees because he does not know where else to go. He can go to his previous dorm since he knows Jaehwan will be out at the after party tonight, but the dorm walls are already thin enough as it is (NOT that he is planning to do anything noisy; just, very minimum privacy). "Unless you know somewhere quiet that we can hang out. When do you have to leave?"

 

"I need to report to HQ by 3."

 

"In the morning?"

 

Minhyun nods.

 

Fuck. That gives him barely 6 hours before Minhyun has to leave.

 

"We can go to my place if you don't mind." Minhyun turns to him and asks.

 

"I don't mind ..." Seongwoo answers. "But will your family not be disturbed? It's quite late."

 

Minhyun laughs. "No, dummy. I mean my apartment that I live."

 

"You have an apartment of your own?" Seongwoo blinks in surprise.

 

"Where do you think I stay in between missions?" Minhyun scoffs, starting the car. 

 

"Your parents' house, actually. You've never mentioned." Seongwoo answers. Now that the idea has been planted into his head, Seongwoo really wants to see Minhyun's place - the one place where he is himself, not the efficient and skilled NIS agent, not the filial son, just Minhyun. "We can go."

 

"The place is a little messy because I have too many things going on lately." Minhyun says sheepishly. "Sorry about that."

 

"Minhyun!" Seongwoo laughs. "Have you not seen my place and the tornado that blew through it regularly for the past three months? I can handle a little messy."

 

* * *

 

 

"Tell me again where the  _mess_ is?" Seongwoo blinks, hands on his hips and standing in the doorway of Minhyun's small but pristine studio apartment. Unless Minhyun is talking about the books that are not stuck on each other in perfect symmetry on the book shelf - who even has a book shelf and have books on it ??? - Seongwoo, for the life of him, cannot figure what exactly is messy about Minhyun's place.

 

There is no kitchen, but Seongwoo already knows Minhyun cannot cook and apart from the small room that serves as a bathroom / toilet, everything else in one place, spanning across an apartment that is not more in size than Seongwoo's own dorm room, but looks miles better because firstly, Minhyun does his bed and secondly, everything is in its place. It feels like a small model room out of an Ikea pamphlet ; Seongwoo likes to think his room gives it more characters even if socks on dining table are not exactly hygienic.

 

"It is very dusty." Minhyun fusses and crosses over to where he has his Roomba charged. "Hang on. I'll get it cleaned .."

 

"Minhyun!" Seongwoo cuts him off. "There is only about 5 hours left for me to have you here, and if you make me share that 5 hours with a fucking robot vacuum, I am going to never forgive you."

 

Minhyun laughs, loud and boisterous, but he also stops fussing around with his Roomba and turns to Seongwoo, opening his arms. "Well. Come here then."

 

Seongwoo thinks it speaks a lot to how strong Minhyun is when Seongwoo literally tries to throw his body into Minhyun's arms, and all that does is make Minhyun stumbles back a little before he steadies both of them, his hands firm around Seongwoo's waist.

 

"Hello." Minhyun blinks, face centimetres away from Seongwoo's. His eyelashes are ridiculously long and his mouth look like a little pebble that Seongwoo wants to bite so Seongwoo just does that, laughing to himself when Minhyun yelps before his hands move to Seongwoo's face and he kisses him for real. 

 

Seongwoo does not want to lie and say he does not think about it, when Minhyun's hands are under his shirt and Seongwoo's very own hand is dangerously and temptingly close to the first button of Minhyun's jeans, but Seongwoo does not want their first time to be rushed and short. Plus, he does not have any supply on him because obviously, he was not expecting to be here when the evening started.

 

"Stop thinking so loud." Minhyun whispers into his lips and Seongwoo laughs.

 

"I think the normal consensus was that I rarely think."

 

"You do." Minhyun says and presses his index fingers in between Seongwoo's eyebrows. "There is a little line here, that comes out whenever you are over your head."

 

Seongwoo furrows and unfurrows his eyebrows just to make sure.

 

"What are you thinking about?" Minhyun takes his finger off and whispers.

 

"About how I don't have condoms." Seongwoo says because well, they do say honesty is the best policy.

 

Minhyun bursts out laughing. "God, you are a menace."

 

"I assume that means you don't have any here as well?"

 

"No," Minhyun shakes his head. "I never bring anyone home."

 

"Oh," Seongwoo says and leans in until his lips are resting on top of Minhyun. "What an honour for me then."

 

* * *

 

They did not do anything except making out, and talking about this book that Minhyun is reading in between to catch their breaths a little. Seongwoo does not get what is so exciting about a book on French Revolution, but Minhyun is very enthusiastic about it, so Seongwoo just listens in content and drinks his face in, memorising every single dot and line. Minhyun's place is just like him, simple and nothing much going on at a glance, but there is an elegance and quirkiness that lies underneath that simplicity - like the mismatched coloured cushion throws Minhyun has on his beds or the small little glass figurines of worldwide landmarks parked neatly next to each other in front of the TV. Seongwoo wishes he has had more time, to familiarise himself more with this place, to familiarise himself more with Minhyun, but time is a ruthless dictator, and soon, the shrilling sound of Minhyun's alarm breaks through the silence.

 

Minhyun's fingers that are playing around in Seongwoo's hair stills and Seongwoo makes a low noise in his throat. He can hear Minhyun's heart beats like this, with his head just lying on top of Minhyun's chest and Seongwoo tries to listen hard if there is any change, but it is as calm as ever. Well, Minhyun has always been the kind of person who has everything, including his own emotions, together.

 

"You gotta go, don't you?" Seongwoo asks, rising up from where he is lying. "Won't want to be late for your first day back."

 

Minhyun smiles softly but gets up as well, flattening his hair.

 

Seongwoo grabs his phone from the nightstand and gets up, straightening out his clothes. Minhyun pushes himself to the edge of the bed, pulling the nightstand drawer open. 

 

"Here." Minhyun takes something from the drawer and hands it to him so Seongwoo takes it before even realising what it is.

 

"People tend to give things like rings in this kind of situation, Minhyun." Seongwoo laughs down at the small metallic tally counter in his hand. "But thank you. I hope it'll be useful when I have to count how many papers I will have to write to catch up with the rest of my batch."

 

"It is for you to help with focus." Minhyun smiles and stands up, reaching for his coat sprawled across the sofa. "You are a person with a lot of thoughts, Seongwoo, and sometimes, you can't catch up with all those."

 

"That's a nice way to say I am usually in over my head." 

 

"I didn't say that." Minhyun smiles. "Whenever you get too stressed out or start panicking, try to breathe and if you have this on your person, use it to calm down."

 

"Don't be overbearing like this." Seongwoo says, and pockets the little device anyway. "I've survived all my life without you."

 

"I know." Minhyun says quickly. "I am sorry if I am being too much. Just ... I worry."

 

"Minhyun," Seongwoo laughs, and he is not sure if it comes out as sadly as he feels. "Between the two of us, who is travelling miles away on a national security mission? I mean, I know I am accident prone, but not really the same scale here, pal."

 

"I am sorry." Minhyun says again.

 

"Don't be." Seongwoo smiles and reaches for him until Minhyun comes easily into his arm, and hooks his chin over Seongwoo's shoulder.

 

"I guess old habits die hard, huh?" Seongwoo whispers. "I will be fine so go kick some ass. Get the person who is responsible for my mom, and come back to me in one piece. If you are even slightly hurt, I am going to kill you. Do you understand?"

 

"Yes, sir." Minhyun whispers back.

 

* * *

 

 

The drive back is silent, and short because Minhyun stays depressingly close to the Blue House. He is dropping Seongwoo first back at the Residence before heading over to the NIS HQ at the city square to get in and gear up.

 

Seongwoo tries to think of any thing to say, something that sounds romantic or encouraging or sweet or flirty, but anything he can think of does not seem to entirely convey how he feels right now because how do you put pride and sadness and worry and fear and happiness all in one sentence without reciting cliche love phrases from Hall Mark cards, and Minhyun is also turning into the drive way of the Residence, so Seongwoo is running out of time to say anything.

 

"Minhyun." He blurts out anyway because he is going to regret if he does not say anything. Minhyun's hand on the gear stick stills and he turns to look at Seongwoo. "I ... I am ... I"

 

"Hey," Minhyun says softly and one of his hands reaches over to one of Seongwoo's own that he has been twisting on his pants with. "I know. Alright? I know."


	18. Chapter 18

Seongwoo wakes up with a headache, and it stays with him throughout the day. His entire body seems like something is weighing his bones down, and he is distracted and unfocused, finally getting kicked out of mom's room as a result when he tries to make her tea and burn his hand. So now, he has a headache, joint ache, and a bandage on his hand. How very dignified of him.

 

See. The thing is Seongwoo understands long distance relationships in theory; it is just a little more difficult in reality, and is it even a long distance relationship when he does not know how long the distance between him and his relationship person is. Plus, you know, they always says you have to communicate and stay connected to each other for a long distance relationship to work, and well, good fucking luck with that because Minhyun has probably gone completely off the grid, and Seongwoo does not know a single thing about what Minhyun is doing after he dropped Seongwoo off last night. He does not even know how Minhyun is getting to Beijing, a plane or a jet or a helicopter or an underground tunnel that they have to dig up with a spoon, so he has no idea when Minhyun will land or if they are even going to Beijing in first place.

 

Seongwoo is a naturally curious person and it is driving him nuts because now it involves his boyfriend and Seongwoo can't just sit tight on his hands.

 

He has no idea how Sungwoon does it all the time.

 

Maybe he overrides every authority at NIS with like the power of his glares alone until someone caves in and tells him where Daniel is.

 

He has been banned from entering the President's room by the President himself because his mom probably knows that Seongwoo is having one of those days where he is a walking danger to anyone around, so Seongwoo just stations in front of the TV in the lounge, and mindlessly goes through all of Mudo reruns because his bedroom is too big and lonely and depressing.

 

"You look like you lost your pet turtle." Seongwoo cranes his neck to see Sungwoon standing next to the couch where he has been lying in various positions for the past .. fuck, it is already 8 in the evening? "Again."

 

"Stop using my worst childhood trauma against me." Seongwoo pouts and gets up, wincing at the stiffness in his neck. "What do you want?"

 

"Well, the President says you might be feeling sad because you had to drop out from the musical yesterday, and is now moping all over the Blue House." Sungwoon says and sits down next to him. "So, I brought a ridiculously expensive whiskey that I am pretty sure was a bribe from the SHC group. We can share."

 

"Should you be taking it if it is a bribe?" Seongwoo blinks.

 

"Well, the SHC representative said it was a present, and I also didn't give her the permit she was aiming for, so yes, why not." Sungwoon shrugs. "Do you want to go into the dining room or?"

 

"No, my room is better.." Seongwoo says. "I'll get the staff to bring some ice and soda. I don't like whiskey that much though."

 

"That's because you have no taste."

 

* * *

 

 

Seongwoo watches Sungwoon drowns his neat whiskey and then winces dramatically, and decides to take a slower approach, which pays off well because it is smoky as hell, and Sungwoon is now coughing. 

 

"Serve you right." He mutters and pushes the water jug towards him. 

 

"How long has it been since we drink together?" Seongwoo muses. He is pretty sure it was before he even started his master because that was before the campaign, and Sungwoon has a little less on his plate back then. 

 

"Pretty long." Sungwoon says. "To be honest, I haven't even been to like a bar or just any place to socially drink in months. It's either at dinners or mostly at my desk when I am staying too late."

 

"Sound healthy." Seongwoo scoffs.

 

"That's rich coming from a guy who sets his own hand on fire."

 

"Nobody would set their own hand on fire if they can help it!" Seongwoo protests. "I was just distracted."

 

"I think the President was correct about you moping, but it is not the musical, is it?"

 

Seongwoo snorts. "Of course not. I have plenty of chances for that later."

 

"You will have plenty of chances to see him again too." Sungwoon says.

 

Seongwoo puts down the glass in his hand onto the floor, and pulls his knees up so he can rest his chin on top of them. "How can I be so sure about that when I don't even know where he is or how he is doing, or hell, if he is even still alive, hyung? It is easier for you to say because you can just walk into NIS and ask where Daniel is."

 

"I can't." Sungwoon says. "I am not allowed access to the daily monitoring of this kind of underground missions. I won't know anything until the mission is successful or something is so royally fucked that they need order from the Blue House."

 

"But, mom does, right? I mean, if she asks for a report, they will give her." Seongwoo says. He has been thinking about it before; he has no idea how to persuade mom, but it is not something entirely impossible.

 

"Seongwoo," Sungwoon sighs. "Don't go down that road. These protocols are in place not to protect just the mission. It is to protect them as well. Trust him to make his way back."

 

"It is not him that I don't trust!" Seongwoo says, frustrated. "How did you do this shit for years? Just let him go and go again?"

 

"It does not get easier with times if that's what you mean." Sungwoon says and throws back another glass. Seongwoo is starting to think that this really is affecting Sungwoon more than he thinks. "Hell, if anything, it gets more and more difficult each times. We've been dating for four years, Seongwoo."

 

That .. that was since before Seongwoo even finishes his Bachelors. Sungwoon really kept it from them all this time, but that is a bone to pick another time.

 

"And," Sungwoon continues. "Do you know how much of that I have spent with him physically next to me? Not more than six months in total, and three of them was because he gets grounded by NIS for disobeying a direct order."

 

"Shit." Seongwoo says. "If you are thinking you are here to help me get over this slump or something, not really helping."

 

"Well," Sungwoon laughs bitterly. "I will let you know when I figure it out for myself first."

 

"Cheers to that." Seongwoo clinks his glass against Sungwoon's. "But, hyung, four years is a significant amount of times. Didn't you .. I mean when it gets very difficult, don't you want to give up?"

 

"I don't want to, but do I think about it sometimes? Yeah." Sungwoon blandly says.

 

"So, why didn't you? Is it because of love, the strongest wonder of them all?" Seongwoo asks, adding some fancy hand sparkles to illustrate his point. 

 

"I don't know." Sungwoon shrugs. "I mean I can talk nice about how much he is worth trying for and how much he means to me to stay and wait for him, but at the end of the day, it all comes down to just me having no other option. Yeah, I am miserable every time I watch him come through the door with a new broken bone or another scar, but anything else is even worse. I don't think I am going to be able to stop being affected by him, and right now, at least, when he comes back, he comes back to me. That is good enough."

 

"All that long winded sentences just to say that you love him." Seongwoo smiles, and shakes his head. "That is so you."

 

"Fuck off." Sungwoon glares. 

 

"Don't worry. I will take your secret to grave and never tell a soul that you are a real boy with a real heart after all." Seongwoo smirks.

 

"Hearts are overrated."

 

"I know, right?" Seongwoo scoffs. "What do they even do except keeping us alive?"

 

"And making us suffer."

 

"I will drink to that."

 

* * *

 

 

Things do get easier because when you just go through the motion day by day by day, it becomes a routine and routines are simple and numbing enough. Seongwoo feels like every day he is applying a paper thin bandage on a wound that is still pretty much open so as times go by, he gets better at not showing it and not noticing it, but he has no doubt that once all the layers of distraction are ripped away, he is still going to be feeling the exact same pain. But going to school (with his still very much ridiculous parade of 5 security details) and attending auditions and being with his friends help to numb the pain a little, and Seongwoo cannot really complain about it.

 

NIS is still against him moving back to the dorm, and mom has just started going back to office (only 8 hours per day, and under strict supervision), so Seongwoo does not want to push. The campus dorms have a vacancy policy of no more than two months, but Woojin "moves in" to register for the room using his student card even though Seongwoo is the one paying rent and Woojin is still living in sin with his boyfriend, so the place is secure for now. Jaehwan, however, has been complaining though because the campus have to give Woojin a key as it is under his name, and Seongwoo has no doubt the two Parks have been misusing it to terrorise him. Well, at least Jaehwan has the whole dorm to his self so he can deal with the demonic pair for a while.

 

Sungwoon catches him one evening when Seongwoo was going over to the office to drop off his mom's coat and doctors-approved heat pads because it is still only early winter, but the temperature has suddenly dropped so much in the evening. 

 

"We have an update."

 

Seongwoo does not need ask what kind of update and his heart already starts drumming out of his ears. "Here. Read through it."

 

Seongwoo greedily grabs the file Sungwoon is handing him and skims through once before reading it from top to bottom again just to make sure he does not skip anything.

 

"Why are you showing me this?" Seongwoo asks immediately afterwards. It seems like this would be the kind of thing he will need security clearance for, and Sungwoon is not the type to go against the rules for  _friendship._

 

"We will be making this report available to public." Sungwoon says. "The President will be delivering the news in an hour and we will send this report out to news outlet afterwards. People can really use this good news, Seongwoo."

 

"They are still not coming back." Seongwoo says, and Sungwoon smiles sadly.

 

"No, they are not, but half the battle is won, and we should take every ounce of victory you can get." 

 

Seongwoo nods because he can understand that, and he really is truly happy that the mission can be considered successful, and the person who is responsible for his mom is now in their government custody.

 

He just wants to be a little bit selfish and wants Minhyun to be back as well.

 

"C'mon. I'll give you his stuff." Sungwoon says. "You can keep it for him."

 

* * *

 

 

Later that night, Seongwoo watches his mother on TV in Minhyun's living room.

 

The place is the exact same as the night they have left. Even one of Minhyun's shoes that were previously arranged in a neat little row but got slanted because Seongwoo bumped into it that night when he was going out is still in the same slanted position, standing out like a sore thumb in the perfectly uniform lines of shoes. Seongwoo knocks it with his toes to put it back into place. Minhyun did say that both his parents and his sister know the access code to his apartment as well, but they barely visit when he is on a mission because they find it difficult, and Seongwoo kind of understands. It is unnerving to say at least, to be standing in the middle of a room full of Minhyun's touches and not even knowing where Minhyun is right now.

 

His mother looks radiant on TV, even if he is very disposable to favouritism right now. She looks like the exact woman Seongwoo remembers to be waiting him at home after school every day, stern and firm, but also understanding and mostly, loving. Her speech is short and the emphasis is on how the National Intelligence Service agents have worked days and nights for months until they were able to apprehend most of the extremist group that terrorised their country five months ago. It is meant to be prideful and celebratory and most of all, reassuring. Minhyun and Daniel were barely a footnote in her speech because when she said "NIS agents are still pursuing the escapees", she does not even mention that it is just Daniel and Minhyun going into the unknown once again to root out the entirety of the people they are hunting down.

 

Seongwoo sighs and grabs at the small packed box that an NIS agent handed to him earlier. According to the agents on the first mission who came back with the criminals (Seongwoo is not saying it is fair for him to be pissed that they get to come back first while Minhyun has to keep digging deeper, but he is pissed), Daniel and Minhyun stayed behind because they are the mission leads and they want to finish it once and for all, but they did take some time to write some letters and postcards for people back home.

 

Sungwoon only got a couple of letters and a little palm size box from Daniel, so Seongwoo does not know why he has this very tightly packed box.

 

The very first thing he sees is a letter addressed to Minhyun's parent and a stack of postcards full of cartoon characters, so Seongwoo assumes those are for his nephew. But underneath all that, wedged right inside the box is a flat leather bound black book that is way too familiar.

 

Even Seongwoo has forgotten. He remembered to ask it back from Minhyun way back then (which honestly feels like a life time ago), but then things happened and he eventually forgot. Hell, he hasn't even written a single sentence in the past six months, let alone a complete poem.

 

The book is the exact same as he has given to Minhyun, all his embarrassing thoughts and feelings inside it on full display. God, he cannot believe he gave this for Minhyun to read before he even had an inkling of intuition that Minhyun likes him. Seongwoo had, perhaps, been whipped for way longer than he thought.

 

There is another book underneath his own, a new book that Seongwoo has not seen before, so Seongwoo picks it out as well in curiosity. It is similar to his own book, not the exact same, but you can't really have much variety on black leather bound A4 books anyway, but it is definitely brand new unlike Seongwoo's own which is almost falling apart at the seam.

 

Seongwoo flips through the new book, but immediately stops because there are words on the very first page.

 

 _Hi Seongwoo_ The first line reads and Seongwoo would be a little bitch if he starts to tear up from two words, one of which is a greeting and another is his own name, but it is not his fault he has feelings.

_I am sorry I never got to return you your book. And when I was leaving KOR, I wanted to have something that reminds me of you, so I brought it along. But now I will probably be hopping from place to place (if you don't already know why, please don't try to find out - my department head might actually punch you for being annoying. He already mentioned that during every update call we have!*), so I don't think it is very safe to bring this along with me. We can't have your first collection lost in some dirty alleyways of some vague country that I shouldn't tell you._

_Also, your original book is already filled to the last two pages, so I get you this new one. I will read everything you've written in this when I get back._

_We are in a cafe, and the coffee is shitty but at least, there is air condition and wifi. We can't use it for communication, of course, but Daniel is over the moon because he can watch football. You would have hated here. It is noisy and humid and the table is unstable, so my handwriting is all wonky. I don't know what else to write to be honest. I just want to explain about your book that I stole or never returned, and now I can't stop writing. Maybe that childhood dream of being a writer was a wrong call after all. I hope you are well. I should have started with this, but there is no space to write it up there now. I hope you are doing well, and taking care of yourself, and not drinking 3 red bulls a day. I am fine too so don't worry too much. I will be back soon._

_I miss you._

_Minhyun_

_* Foot note: You are not annoying to me. Please don't misunderstand. I think it is sweet._

 

His tears taste like salt and the lingering aftertaste of the dust that has built up in Minhyun's room.


	19. After-Credits

Seongwoo moves back to the dorm after new year. NIS has been less of an uptight dick now that the threat level has gone down. He even has managed to get his security detail down to one - who only really checks in during school hours. He knows mom is trying to re-initiate the reunification talks again, so he does not fool himself into thinking he is rid of this, but after all that he has gone through the past year, he cannot say that he is that much against it.

 

Things are ... normal. He goes to school and if all goes well, he will be getting his Master by end of May. He is constantly going to auditions, ones that do not guarantee to hire him once they know he is Ong Seongwoo. He is writing, still without a publisher, but self-publishing is something he is considering once he is properly satisfied with his works. He never really wanted to make money out of poetry; he just wants people to read it and maybe think a little bit about it for ten minutes of their times and he is happy enough. He has taken up a contract position as an Art high school theatre program manager / stage producer, and they are thinking of offering him a full time position once he gets his master. Things are fine.

 

Jaehwan has been signed to a small indie label, something he has been too over excited about that Seongwoo has to sit him down and talk him through so he does not ditch his Applied Music Master for a vague chance at making it. It mainly means the dorm is less noisy though because now Jaehwan has an actual place with proper acoustics to practice and write his music. Seongwoo is happy for him, but these days, they barely see each other and it just feels weird to be reach that stage of growing apart that you know is inevitable anyway.

 

The door bell rings and Seongwoo checks his phone to confirm that it is Tuesday, meaning there is no class or work, and he had taken full advantage of it last night, staying up until 4 in the morning to finish one of his papers.

 

Seongwoo groans, picking himself up and dragging his heavy feet across the floor to open the door.

 

“Do you always open your door to any stranger?” The guy at the other end of threshold says.

 

Seongwoo does not cry, but he thinks it is probably because he stayed up so late and both his eyes and tear ducts are dried.

 

"I do when they are my asshole boyfriend." He chokes out, and Minhyun crosses the threshold, pulling Seongwoo into him a little awkwardly given that one of his arms is in a sling. "When did you get back? You could not even have called?"

 

"Two hours back." Minhyun says into his neck, and Seongwoo winds his hands across Minhyun's back and puts his hands on Minhyun's shoulder. "I had to debrief first and they are still reactivating my mobile."

 

"I told you not to get hurt." Seongwoo mumbles.

 

"It's almost completely healed." Minhyun says and tries to pull apart but Seongwoo holds his grip on Minhyun tight.

 

"C'mon." Minhyun laughs. "Let me at least look at you."

 

"I haven't even washed my face yet." Seongwoo mumbles but Minhyun's good hand is already tracing along Seongwoo's jaw line, his thumb rubbing over Seongwoo's stubble spot.

 

"I miss you." Minhyun says. "Every single day. I am sorry it took me so long to come back."

 

"It's ok." Seongwoo says and leans in until he is resting his forehead against Minhyun's. Minhyun kissed his jaw. The corner of his mouth. "I am ok. You are here."

 

Sungwoon is right. Seongwoo really has no other option anyway because when Minhyun comes back, Seongwoo needs him to come back to him.


End file.
